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#thanos – @miss-ingno on Tumblr
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Dash of Mystery to go with Misery

@miss-ingno / miss-ingno.tumblr.com

Ao3: missingnowrites | Dreamwidth: miss-ingno | YT: miss-ingno | icon by @squigglysky | Weilan is my One True OTP
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zephror

squirrel girl is canonically more powerful than thanos

if anyone is wondering “how the fuck?”: this was a pretty complicated thing that marvel set up, where they evaluated each hero and villain’s capabilities based on who they defeated, how they defeated them, who they were defeated by, and so on.

except, as it turns out, squirrel girl has defeated a LOT of powerful villains. case in point, her very first appearance has her solo-defeating doctor doom, without the help of iron man (who was nearby). this was also one of the few occasions where doom was defeated and it WASN’T a doombot. this turned squirrel girl into kind of a meme once the story hit the internet for obvious reasons, even though this story was just a one-shot. so then marvel brings her back, and has her defeat three villains in one comic, INCLUDING THANOS. (they even had other characters confirm that it wasn’t a trick, it wasn’t a fake thanos, that was actually thanos and he lost to squirrel girl because she set squirrels on him.)

the result? squirrel girl always wins. if there is an argument about “who would win?”, and squirrel girl is one of the options, then she wins by default because she’s squirrel girl. and this means that squirrel girl has to be the most powerful character in marvel by raw stats, because she always wins. you genuinely can’t beat squirrel girl.

by the by: she’s coming to the mcu soon in the new warriors tv show. that should be entertaining.

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Bugs Bunny could singlehandedly defeat Thanos by dressing up as a TSA agent and setting up a metal detector in the middle of the battlefield saying that all metal objects must be removed if you want to pass on through now stick around for my 2,000 word essay on just how effectively he would convince The Mad Titan to comply

“For shame, doc! Dontcha know we got other folks waiting?”

(Thanos looks behind him and sees dozens of Bugs Bunnies dressed as angry yelling travelers with huge bags of luggage. Thanos rubs his neck guiltily and begins sliding off the gauntlet)

I felt compelled

I don’t think I’ve seen such a finely crafted Looney Toons joke in over two decades. Bravo.

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could thanos just like..,… calm down?? why he wanna be ruler of the universe anyway,, universe ain’t done nothing cool?? wanna know what is cool?? lazer tag,,, why can’t he just calm down..,,,… buy a lazer tag place and earn a steady income w the lazers….. ?

we can’t get the actual reason in the movie, because fox owns Deadpool, but the entire infinity war is because Thanos is in love with Death, who’s in love with Deadpool, so Thanos wants to destroy the universe and kill as many people as possible to win Death’s heart. we’ve been robbed some QUALITY interactions since Deadpool isn’t in this movie and they probs won’t include Death.

ah so basically thanos is an entitled fuckboy that was turned down and went on a killing spree bc he feels like he’s owed a relationship

didn’t think i could have more reasons to hate thanos and YET

that’s exactly what it is.

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