Dash of Mystery to go with Misery

#every year he doesnt have an emmy is a sham

Am I the only one who really wants Holt and Kevin to have a daughter? 

And by that I don’t mean I want him and Kevin to adopt. 

I mean I want it to be an average day at the precinct when Holt walks out of his office with a young woman. They shake hands, bid goodbye and Jake walks over to ask who she is. 

“Who’s that? Someone from city hall?”

And Holt just casually replies. “No that’s my daughter.” 

And everyone in the bullpen just stops, stunned. Because he’s never mentioned it before, ever, even in passing. 

“You have a daughter?” 

“Yes, her name is Claire, she is 24 years of age and studying at Jon Hopkins.” 

Everyone turns to look at Amy who’s frantically flipping through six, thick binders, freaking out because she has not even a footnote on Claire’s existence!

Charles: Amy, how do you not know this?  Doesn’t the captain have photos of his daughter?

Jake: Yeah, I thought you investigated everyone that’s breathed the same air as the captain in an effort to bond with him. 

Amy: I thought she was his notary! 

*cut away*

Holt: Here is your certificate confirming you completed volume one of my mentorship program. 

Amy: Thank you Captain!  So official, it’s even notarized!

Holt: Yes.  Here is a photograph of the notary, Claire. 

Amy: Oh, I saw her in a photo with you and Kevin, I was wondering what your relationship was.  Did she notarize your marriage certificate?

Holt: *looks at watch* Given that it is 30 seconds after official work hours I will permit this single personal question.  Yes she did. 

*cut back*

Jake: You didn’t think it was weird he had a photo of his notary on his phone?  Wait, no.  That’s the sort of thing I wouldn’t have questioned either. 

I love how Ray Holt is portrayed simultaneously as a serious, emotionless captain as well as the most dramatic and petty person on the whole team. I live for his deadpan dramatic-ness and I’ve honestly never seen a character like him before on TV

The first time we see Kevin, he describes Holt as hilarious and the other characters are bewildered by this, but Holt has been a prankster since the beginning of the show. In the very first episode, when he was making Jake carry on with the robot impression, he was pranking him. The hula hoop incident.The fact he got so into the Halloween heists. Winding Jake up is one of his greatest sources of amusement and he loves playing jokes on people.

It’s just that no one recognises them as jokes because his face stays utterly serious throughout.

a concept: jake introducing captain holt to queer eye

a follow up concept: holt IMMEDIATELY nominating jake for queer eye after watching the series

because no amount of gifs could do this scene justice

In which Holt surprises Jake with a visit at the VA, and introduces him to some family… (headcanon that Sam and Ray are related is based on this magnificent fanfic that you all need to read)

more Steve Rogers gifs /// more Jake Peralta gifs /// more Sam Wilson gifs /// more Ray Holt gifs /// all gifs

Your story checks out.