Dash of Mystery to go with Misery

This is my @stevetonysecretsanta gift for @notevenwinded. Happy New Year!

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The cab driver craned his neck a little to get a better view of the house as they drove up. “Looks like a nice place to spend the holiday,” he said. His tone was admiring. Steve supposed that a cabbie who normally worked in his neighborhood didn’t take a lot of fares to Fifth Avenue mansions. Or maybe it was just the elaborate Christmas decorations that made him sound so impressed.

“There will be some good friends to spend it with. That’s all that matters.” Steve tried to project a little confidence into his tone, but he was pretty sure he failed, significantly. “Anyway, at least I won’t have to sleep on the couch.”

“In a place like this?” the cabbie pulled to a stop in front of the house. “Bet they have an entire guest suite.”

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protect tony stark. with kisses.

it started years ago, informally, as a monthly drink between happy and rhodey; a few months after pepper started at stark industries, she was invited along to join them. years passed before anyone else came around worthy of joining their little club — pepper invited natasha, but she balked at the implication in the group’s title and refused to show up — so they stayed a party of three until tony dragged bruce into his life (bruce drinks tea instead of whiskey, but he always comes). the day rhodey met sam wilson and recognized him as a kindred spirit, he decided it didn’t matter if it was tony specifically who was at the heart of someone’s situation: a man who knows trouble helps his fellows in the same boat, a theory that eventually brings bucky barnes and (finally) natasha on board.

"welcome," says rhodey, every third friday at an undisclosed location, "to this meeting of the ‘why am i friends with this ridiculous asshole’ society." the room nods a weary hello.

THE JOGGING yells sam THE SLEEPWALKING cries pepper PICKING FIGHTS WITH BULLIES growls bucky PICKING FIGHTS WITH HIMSELF snaps rhodey NEVER LISTENS TO MY ADVICE sighs natasha NEVER STOPS GIVING ME BAD ADVICE moans happy bruce takes a long bracing sip of his tea and clears his throat before he grinds out THINKS. I'M. HIS. THERAPIST. there's a long silence and then sam puts a hand on bruce's shoulder THE 'WHY AM I FRIENDS WITH THIS RIDICULOUS ASSHOLE' SOCIETY EVERY THIRD FRIDAY TAKING APPLICATIONS ALL THE TIME.