Farewell, Dresden Files

“Everyone I know goes away in the end

And you could have it all

My empire of dirt

I will let you down

I will make you hurt

If I could start again a million miles away

I would keep myself

I would find a way.”

I never wanted to be here, and yet I am anyway. 

I am walking away from The Dresden Files.

“No more.”

One major spoiler for Battle Ground below. You’ve been warned. 

I know I’m screaming into the void here, but

Can we talk about the lack of HarriKarri content in Peace Talks?

Spoilers for Peace Talks below. Also, a very long rant.

Hey, guys, I’m handling Peace Talks really well. :))))))))))))))))))))

Peace Talks Reactions

Hey, Dresden Fandom. You guys may or may not be knee deep in Peace Talks, but if you are, I welcome you to the below reactions, in handy dandy bullet form. I would love to discuss the book if you’re interested, whether you reblog with comments or shoot me a chat. I just finished the book, so all spoilers are below the Read More tag. 

Woof. Well, at least it was something after six fucking years of waiting.

Comforting Sunday thoughts

The fact that our beautiful avenging angel Karrin Murphy is the literal antithesis of an actual Karen. 

ICYMI, the wonderful Internet has come together to agree that the snotty, white privileged, nasty “I wanna speak to your manager” bitches have all been bestowed the title of Karen. Which, as someone who worked retail for almost 10 years, I can confirm that this horrid woman exists in the tens of thousands and it doesn’t matter what state you live in, she has the same traits every single time.

And I’m just imagining our glorious Karrin Murphy during the 2020 coronavirus climate sensibly shopping in a store while practicing proper social distancing and wearing a mask and being kind to every single retail employee, and she gets up to the counter, and she’s stuck behind a Karen. 

And this Karen is going off on the cashier about the usual Karen shit that any retail worker can corroborate--trying to force them to use an expired coupon, screaming about something being out of stock, insisting she gave them a $20 when in fact she gave them a $10, you know, Karen’s greatest hits--and Karrin is listening to it for about 60 seconds before calmly stepping forward and confronting Karen and asking her to act like a reasonable, sensible human being instead of a raging, bratty toddler.

Karen puffs up her chest and adjusts her Aviators and tells Karrin to fuck off. Karrin tells her that if she doesn’t stop harassing the cashier, she’ll call the cops. Karen sputters that she doesn’t have the nerve. Karrin shows the woman her CPD badge--I mean, honestly, I think she’d still carry her old ID badge just in case there’s an emergency and any authorities need to know she’s a former cop--and holds up her cell phone and says, “Try me.”

Karen huffs and turns around, quickly paying for her crap and stomping away, grumbling about Karrin’s rudeness as she goes. Karrin gets up to the counter and asks the cashier if they’re doing alright. The cashier thanks her graciously for intervening and when Karrin pays for her stuff, the cashier chuckles after seeing her name on her credit card.

“What?” Karrin asks.

“I can’t believe Karrin saved me from a Karen,” the cashier laughs.

Karrin just winks at them. “Life is stranger than fiction.” 

Peace Talks/Battle Ground reactions from one overly emotional dumbass fangirl

Me, seeing Harry Dresden and Karrin Murphy cuddling on the couch, finally canon after fifteen goddamn fucking books of sexual tension:

Me, seeing Harry roll around on the ground locking lips with Lara Raith’s literally thirsty ass:

Me, seeing that my dramatic goth bitch husband Thomas Raith done got himself in trouble yet again:

Me, seeing Marcone’s boring ass show up again:

Me, finding out that the next fucking book is called Battle Ground and it’s dropping in 2020 as well:

Me, finding out that allegedly Jim Butcher said Battle Ground is going to have a similar impact that Changes did for the characters:

We need to talk

About the fact that Trevor and Sypha put out the most insane Harry Dresden/Karrin Murphy vibes that I have ever seen and I am here for it.

I mean, think about it.

Sypha Belnades:

-tiny

-adorable

-short hair

-blue eyes

-too pure for this world 

-CAN MOTHERFUCKING KICK YOUR MOTHERFUCKING ASS WITHOUT HESITATION AND GOD HELP YOU IF YOU INCUR HER WRATH BECAUSE SHE WILL DESTROY YOU WHERE YOU STAND YOU PEASANT

Trevor Belmont:

-tall

-dark, messy hair

-deep voice

-likes cats

-a certified goddamn fucking mess (TM)

-follows the short haired, blue eyed badass around doing everything she tells him to do because he is completely S O F T for her in every single way 

-also he would probably be dead in a ditch somewhere if she hadn’t saved his dumb ass

-absolutely loves to beat the living shit out of bad guys, monsters, and bullies

I mean, look at them:

My fuckin’ heart can’t stand that I get to enjoy not one but two ships that hit all my stupid buttons at once. 

I’m not saying I’m gonna write a Castlevania HarriKarri AU at some point.

But I’m also not-not saying that.

Fuck me, where is Peace Talks already?

HarriKarri Domestic Wishlist

Happy Thanksgiving!

Know what I’m thankful for? 

This fucking OTP that consumes my life and makes me miserable with every waking moment that Peace Talks isn’t out.

Anyway. Here’s some shit I want to happen in future Dresden Files books. Keep in mind half of these I am probably going to dump in the fic trashpile myself someday. 

-A totally graphic, explicit, hot-as-hell sex scene on par with Chapter 14 of Skin Game, but also the immediate aftermath, as I am absolutely sure the first time they have sex, it's going to be phenomenal and they're both going to be like, "wow, holy shit, I can't believe we went this long without doing these things to each other."

-Harry losing his mind the first night he walks into the bedroom and Murphy's waiting for him wearing either nothing at all or some tasteful lingerie, or heaven help him, a slutty Nurse outfit or the like. She doesn't need the help. She does it simply because his reaction would be outstandingly hilarious.

-Bed sleeping position shenanigans, of the "just how exactly do we do this when Harry's almost two feet taller than Karrin" variety. I think most of the time Harry would spoon Murph, or they'd both sleep on their sides facing away from each other, but for the honeymoon period of the relationship, I think they'd cuddle like nobody's business. We already know Harry likes to cuddle from past experiences anyhow, and I think Murph wouldn't mind it. Bonus points if Murphy snores or is a cover-hog or kicks Harry in her sleep and he thinks it's hilarious.

-Harry and Murphy on the couch, quietly reading together, at least until Harry starts playing Footsie with her, because of course he would.

-Kissing each other each time one of them enters or leaves somewhere. Bonus points if Harry just does it without thinking and one of their friends is there and they go, "Oh, right, we haven't told anyone yet."

-Murphy taking Harry to a shooting range to brush up on his marksman skills.

-Murphy taking an interest in Harry's potion and tinkering work in his new lab (wherever that ends up being), watching as he explains the different things he's making and why, and asking intelligent questions that make him even more excited and proud of what he's doing.  

-Harry bringing Murphy along to help him buy a new car. Because he obviously doesn't know what the hell he should be getting considering how old the Blue Beetle probably was before its untimely death.

-Murphy patiently teaching Harry what to do with the money he got after getting diamonds out of Hades' vault and helping him with finances in general, since he probably doesn't know much other than "what do you mean I can't stuff the cash inside my mattress and take it out as needed?"

-Thomas sincerely telling Murphy he's happy they're finally together, of course after he's done incessantly mocking them. I'm pretty sure he's just going to go The Lonely Island route and buy them a cake that says, "CONGRATS ON THE SEX!" Plus, Thomas doing cute shit now that she's basically his sister-in-law, like buying her a Christmas present or a birthday present or even little things he notices that she might need like a new cleaning kit for her guns or new ammo.

-Harry gently introducing Murphy to Maggie, only when they both feel comfortable enough to meet. Then, as time goes on, Murphy becoming "Aunt Karrin" or the equivalent that Maggie will want to use once the early awkwardness is over. Murphy would be one hell of an excellent role model for the kid, and I can see Maggie wanting to talk to her about things that would make her dad paranoid or nervous, and Murphy would be able to take it in stride. Or God help her, once she's old enough to date, asking Murphy dating things because we all know Harry would be like, "I DON'T CARE IF YOU ARE A BOY OR A GIRL OR A WHATEVER IF YOU APPROACH MY CHILD FOR A DATE I WILL LAUNCH YOU INTO THE FUCKING SUN."

-Harry and Murphy deciding on if they're going to have pet names. I feel like they'd both tease each other, but then completely not notice when Harry calls her "hon" or "babe" subconsciously and she does it right back, and Thomas is in the corner dabbing his eyes that he gets to hear it after all these years of fucking waiting.

-Murphy tinkering around the house and Harry swoops by and kisses her and she asks what it was for and he just shrugs and says, "no reason" and goes back to whatever the hell he was doing.

-Murphy stealing Harry's shirts on a consistent basis, but he loves it and complains goodnaturedly but smiles like an idiot every time he sees her walking around in one of them. Bonus points if Thomas comes by and sees it and gives her this shiteating grin and she's just like, "Oh, blow me, vampire."

-Either of them finding out one of them sings in the shower. It's totally Harry. Harry absolutely sings in the shower, but then one day he catches Murphy--who only sings when he's not home--and it is the greatest moment of his entire life.

-Christmas with Harry's family, Thanksgiving with Murphy's family.

-Harry and Murphy being exhausted adults who completely sleep through New Years Eve and wake up the next day like, "oh, right, that was a thing" and then kiss and go right back to sleep.

-Going out somewhere and someone accidentally calls Murphy "Mrs. Dresden" and they both spittake and cough awkwardly and blush as they correct the person.

-S.I. finding out that they're finally dating and revealing the giant fucking pot the entire office had going before she left about when and how they'd hook up. Bonus points if Rawlins wins the biggest bet because we all know he was shipping it from like day one.

-Marion Murphy wholeheartedly adopting Harry and fussing over him like he's her son-in-law and Harry being overwhelmingly shy and embarrassed but grateful for it.

-Murphy trying to explain PTA meetings to Harry and Harry having absolutely none of it, but he still drags himself to them anyway.

-Murphy teaching Harry how to cook. It blows his mind how good she is at it. But he picks up on it surprisingly fast and often makes her dinner.

-Murphy having very quiet, frank words with Mab one time when she visits, and Mab considering her a threat not because she's powerful enough to kill her, but because Murph is so incorruptibly good that Mab knows she'll never be able to completely turn Harry with Murph at his side, and Murph's just like, "bring it, bitch, if you think you've got the juice" and Mab kind of just smiles in admiration even though it kind of means they enter into a personal war over his soul and she's going to try and get Harry away from Murphy by all means necessary.

-Every former acquaintance they know saying, "Thank God, finally. Took you long enough" once they find out the two of them are dating. Bonus points if the first person who says so is Kincaid.

-Harry getting a dumb goofy grin on his face whenever Karrin absentmindedly says "I love you" when she leaves.

-Harry and Murphy playfully arguing who had a crush on who first.

-Murphy getting to know Ebenezar and still being in awe that he's one of the only people on the entire freaking planet whom Harry calls "sir."

-Harry and Murphy sharing little things that they remember about their fathers, and both being sort of uncomfortable but knowing it needs to be said in order to continue healing.

-

Please feel free to add your own! I’d be delighted to read other stuff you guys want to happen for our lovable idiots in future novels.

horsehearted replied to your post:

eyeballsto-entrails replied to your post: So I...

In case you somehow needed further proof that Marsters is just a great guy. Thanks for sharing that. I love him so much, I swear.

So I bought Brief Cases

And it was my first time reading the Bigfoot trilogy and “Curses.”

JFC YOU GUYS THIS JUST MADE MY ALREADY OUTRAGEOUS THIRST FOR HARRY DRESDEN EVEN WORSE.

And I didn’t even think that shit was possible.

I mean, Harry’s genuine concern and gentle guidance of Irwin in the first Bigfoot story? Then the progression of protective worrying when Irwin took ill?? Then Harry helping River Shoulders and Irwin eventually connect as well as helping out Connie to discover what she is and break ties with her shitass father???

And then Harry overtly flirting with Jill at the bar????

HOW WAS THIS NOT SUPPOSED TO MAKE ME LOVE HIM MORE PLEASE EXPLAIN THIS TO ME ALSO SEND HELP.

Harry better be happy he’s fictional. I’d marry his gangly ass in a hot second.

Pray for me, y’all. I still have five stories in the collection left to read. @_@

dustandeloquence replied to your post: This is what happens when you mix my sassy ass...

All kidding aside, I am confident Butcher won’t do that. Not twice. It’s gotten to a point in the series now where there is no Harry without Murphy. Harry survived losing Susan because Susan was a giant trashfire he did actually die after she did and was sort of reborn in a way and he could learn to live without her. Murphy? Nah, bruh. Either she lives until she dies of old age and he learns to cope with it or she and Harry go out in a blaze of glory at the end of the series. Harry would go full Darth Vader if Murphy died the way Susan did. She is far too vital to his mental and emotional health.