I let the BG3 companions get plushies from Jellycat, what do you think of their choices? (Aka, the Jellycat plushies I think the companions would enjoy most)

"His notes lit up with passion, his words crowns of fire. He spoke of a pact with the devil, and repeated the refrain: "What else have I got to lose? The soul is only an investment for something always yet to come"

𝑨𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝑨𝒏𝒄𝒖𝒏𝒊𝒏🩸

BG3 aesthetics: Astarion | Shadowheart | Gale | Wyll | Karlach | Halsin | Minthara

Found a mod where I can play as Halsin. Meanwhile, encountering Astarion's favorite monster hunter made it hilarious with Astarion's rapid movements and Halsin's straightman stance.

Some of my favorite things about Astarion in no particular order for no particular reason:

These are all things I wish I could tell him in the game, but since I can't, I write fic to tell him instead ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

The Devil You Know & The Pale Elf

"Minsc," Astarion growled, his voice dripping with disdain, "Do you seriously mean to tell me that you came down to the Underdark with not a single health potion on you?"

Minsc smiled. "Why would Minsc need to bring a health potion when he is so strong, my friend?"

Honestly, it bothers me when people insist pairing Astarion with a woman, portraying him as dominant or writing him with any masculine traits somehow erases his queerness.

Because :

1. He is pan, he doesn't give two shits about his partner's sex or gender. And while doing my first run romancing him as a male I've discovered oh well what do you know he acts the fucking same.

2. HE ACTS DOMINEERING IN GAME.

He canonly does not like being told what to do during sex, mentions making his partner cry out in bed, literally jokes about penetrating Durge, literally has an ending where he makes you his slave (this is part of him, it may be the worst part but it's absolutely there), and in his 'good' ending he still pushes Tav down and climbs on top of them. The literal only times he mentions being on the bottom were in reference to his conquests or is on bottom with a taller Tav in the woods and in those two instances it is performative.

None of this is headcanon this is pulled straight from the game.

3. He has BOTH feminine and masculine traits. He's very finicky about his looks and has a very flamboyant and effeminate way of speaking, but he also loves violence, hides his feelings, wants to be stronger, and has the desire to provide for and protect his partner. And honestly getting upset that people are writing him the way he is in-game is just ridiculous.

It's really not fair to try and put him into the stereotypical feminine queer man box when he is so much more complex than that. So much of his story subverts expectations and honestly that also mixes in with his sexuality and how he expresses himself.

And literally queer guys can be masculine and dominate, I personally may not be the best person to talk about this but I'm pretty sure MANY of my followers will have something to say about it if you try to suggest otherwise.

So my point: Astarion is not a stereotype stop treating him like one.

zzz

There are a lot of people who think Astarion is messy, lazy, sloppy. This is given as proof in the condition of his tent. But I believe something else is actually happening and the lose of the clothes notes kind have clued things in. In the original notes for his clothing, back when we still had those.

Carefully taken care of but clearly well worn. A person who wasn't given much but tried his best to care for himself. Someone who says time and again that no one has cared for him in 200 years and he was all alone. Someone who's been locked away in a tomb, practically buried alive(ish), and forced to live in cramped boarding houses with other vampires.

First... The idea that Astarion is a "slob" because of his tent conditions is kind of insulting. I can be very particular about cleanliness and even I myself struggle to clean up after myself. Its called degression. And mental health troubles are clearly a structure of Astarion character make up. He cares. But he was treated as a throw away (as seen by the book keeper being a ritual back up if you investigate various journals). The items he has gotten were cast aways and just enough to keep him going. Likely they are things he barely manages to hold on to among so many human and vampire slaves that are also clawing tooth and nail to survive. Especially when you could end up in the kennels below the house.

But to go further, the tents are more for aesthetic. Its pretty easy to tell that they are simply meant to be windows into each person. Things that are most important to each person. And Astarion... he has nothing. He does not have faith, nor a pet. As stuffed animal would likely not stick around long and would make him seem weak. He was not allowed to have personal traveling belongings because he was not allowed out side the city. That tent was a discarded find by a survivor making due.

I see Astarions tent and I see the homeless people making due with with that have because it's life or death. I see those with depression pushing forward a single step at a time even when only one thing is keeping you going (like embroidery). I see someone who's putting on a false face because its what he's doing is what he wants and resigning himself to less would mean never getting more.

Idk, I just can't classify Astarion as a "slob". I know its fun to make a meme out of him... and I do love the memes, but this is one of those things that just crossed an emotional line for me. I could never say that another person who's struggling. It just hits too close to home.

I'm thinking about Astarion again and how actually amazing it is that he managed to hold onto as much of himself as he did after having had everything about his identity and sense of self systematically stripped away from him. And how it's even more incredible he managed to do so without even getting to look at himself at all in all that time.

We know his trauma cut him off from his ability to trance and therefore his ability to recall memories from before he was turned. What must it be like to have nothing? Not even happy memories to look back on? A spawn. A dead thing to be used as his master sees fit. Tortured by Cazador and Godey. Starved to the point of constant hunger pain. Forced to use his body and sexuality to seduce people who sometimes not only disgusted him but who would sometimes even hurt him...AND through all of this, this whole nightmare, he can't even see his own face. Even his own perception of himself is stolen from him.

I've gone through some horribly low points in life. Points where I've felt like I was literally losing my mind or about to end it all. And sometimes in those moments, I just had to stare at myself in the mirror, look myself in the eye and literally talk myself down. There have been times where my mental state was so bad and my perception of reality so warped I HAD to look at my own reflection in the mirror to remind myself I was still real.

Astarion remembers so little of his face that he can't remember if he ever had a mole on his cheek or not. He can't remember the color of his own EYES. For as much as fans talk about the angst of him not being able to remember his own eyes I don't know if any of us could even imagine forgetting oneself so completely that such a defining physical characteristic is lost to memory. It's difficult to imagine as beings with limited lifespans. And imagine the added torment of being forced to use your looks to survive all while never being able to actually see yourself. (This is why I can't help but feel a bit annoyed when people say things like "Well it's a GOOD thing he can't see himself, can you imagine how annoying he would be?" Like sorry you find 'petty vanity' annoying, it still doesn't mean he deserved to have his sense of self-perception stripped away).

So much of him was killed in the process over those two hundred years of abuse and neglect in order to survive. I think it's fair to say Astarion likely wasn't a saint before he was turned by Cazador but we do know at one point there WAS a kind, sympathetic part of himself that took pity on that young man he spared. A part that I'm sure had to be killed in order for Astarion to survive and remain sane. And in ALL that time there was never once any moment where he could look at himself in the mirror and tell himself that he was still himself.

He lost everything, even the memory of his own eye color. But he wouldn't allow himself to be lost completely. He still talked back. Still screamed the loudest when tortured. Still held onto his anger, his rage his burning desire for revenge. And when he gets the opportunity to take his freedom he fucking LEAPS for it. He is so bound and determined to STAY free once he is free he would literally rather die than go back to Cazador. He's a survivor above all else and I love him so much.

Me when I see Halsin x Astarion: this ship is very dear to me and so important and good

Me when I see Karlach x Astarion: this ship is very dear to me and so important and good

Me when I see Wyll x Astarion: this ship is very dear to me and so important and good

Me when I-

"Astarion, we need to talk. I know you're a vampire. It's... kind of obvious."

WHY. WHY DID THEY FUCKING. CUT. THE BEST HALSTARION EXCHANGES. WHY WOULD THEY. DO THAT