Filling my rat nest with trinkets

Disappointed in myself.

How do I stay in motion at all hours I'm conscious and accomplish next to nothing?

My body has decided double down on falling apart the last few days.

The smart thing to do would be to just stop fighting the body/brain fatigue (with willpower or self medicating), go straight to bed after this shift THEN focus on finishing the hand full of sketches on my desk.

Any suggestions or requests for me?

Zim “Do you have your back story and position memorized, she-monkey? Great, let's find the Dib and Gir before they get us all deactivated.”

Gaz “Uh, one question; Where are the bathrooms?”

Zim “We're on the Massive. There ARE NO bathrooms.”

Gaz “Where do you people poop?”

Zim “We don't; I mean we do, but our PAKs collect our bodily waste. Much more sanitary.”

Gaz “Well, that's a huge problem because I have to take a dump in the near future.”

Zim “Take a—what?! What does that even mean?”

Gaz “What do you THINK it means, Zim?! It means I have to poop; pass bodily waste the PAKless way.”

Zim “Well, why would you word it like that?”

Gaz “You lived on earth for over 3 years and never heard that expression?”

Zim “It doesn’t make sense! Nobody “takes" a dump, they LEAVE a dump!”

Gaz “We need to come up with a bathroom, Zim. Pick a spot or I pick one.”

Zim “Filthy Rrrrrrr!!! Hold it, human, I'm thinking…”

Some stupid dialogue between Zim and Gaz in an Irken disguise to cheer myself up.

Oh, this is actually really fun! I have given the topic thought. I'm not sure how exactly things went in Colorado; I'm sure it's a nightmare there too. Where I live everything was shut down except bear essentials (overtime for me) and strict regulations have to be kept. I'm basing these answers off what I've experienced.

Hope this cheers you up a little. Be safe everyone. Take care of yourselves. One day at a time. <3

I promise to go through with more refined illustrations that cover the entire cast/ this dialogue.

Bear with me; slow hand.

Eddie "The outbreak has changed our lives overnight. Almost the entire Plaza was shut down except for Frank's Meat Market and that coffee shop next door. The coffeeshop only offers to go orders now. Frank has been only taking call orders too; it's impossible to keep up with demand. It's a zoo in there to say the least. Chris is still on patrol. He has to keep the peace around the plaza; I'm sure it's stressful.

Unfortunately, my tailor shop was shut down and so were the kid's school. Trager gave the kids new tablets to stay on track with their schoolwork. He works from home now, last I talked to him. Trager gets bored very easily. I'm sure he's going insane. At least he takes the virus seriously. He drives Troy to pick up groceries for me every so often. Somehow they make adventures out of that...

Most of the events that I had been commissioned to tailor were canceled or postponed. I still sew from home and occasionally I go to the shop alone to work. My sewing station there is bigger. Still, it was...quite an unforeseen setback.

I was upset. Everyone was-- is worried. It took some adjusting, but one thing about us Gluskins, we strive to keep busy. My store was gone, but Etta has been coaching me to be more computer literate while I teach her my trade. I've even managed to teach Troy some basics beyond cutting patterns. He pitches in more than ever now. My children and I make a good team. We sew masks on a daily basis. Etta and Troy have started putting together essential kits with socks, underwear and night shirts.

Poor kids are desperate for projects to keep them occupied. We've made minor repairs around the house together. I put Troy in charge of grocery shopping, since most of that has be done online too... He seems to like the challenge.

Even still, my children get bored. They find time to be creative. Etta draws her elves. Troy has his dragon stories that he writes and acts out...in every room now.

My living room has been rearranged several times in an effort for the kids to perfect "the fort". The Murder Mannequin Obstical course has also been revived and expanded in the hallway into the spare room...I...We can't have company anyway. May as well let them get exercise.

I think we're adjusting well to the situation, stir craziness aside. Scraping by financially is something I'm used to. My online business keeps us afloat. I still get to do what I love. Etta has introduced me to Zoom weddings. Yes, I want to keep sewing dresses and suits, but more importantly to me on a personal level, it's comforting to know love endures.

As scary as the outbreak is, it's been nice spending more time with my children. We've been safe and cautious so far."

Nny "Hi, Devi. You look beautiful. I like the pastel silver-blue color."

Devi "Goddamnit. Hi, Nny."

Nny "I'm not trying to crash your wedding. I was in town."

Devi "You're dead."

Nny "I'm on a road trip with Squee to meet his... it's a long story. I just wanted to... to... I'll leave."

Devi "It's ok. I was half expecting to see you at some point before the big day. Today isn't my wedding anyways. I was just trying on the dress again. No fucking idea why. Tyler and I are getting married Sunday."

Nny "But-?"

Devi "We posted the wrong date online to avoid harassment."

Nny "Clever. I still can't believe you're marrying a Tyler."

Devi *laughs* "Me neither. But his last name begins with a D, so I can take his name and not have to change my signature."

Nny "You're not less of a person if you don't marry, you know. You shouldn't feel pressured to sign your existence away to someone because it's expected of you or--"

Devi "I love Tyler, ok? I WANT to get married. I just want the goddamn wedding part over with. The traditional bullshit theatrics we're blowing our fucking budgets over is to make my dad and his grandma happy.

I was never the little girl that dreamed of her wedding day, you know? I don't give a shit about corsages and wedding colors and writing vows and whatever the fuck else this six hour event takes! It's all a big distraction from work and one more thing to sink me into debt ontop of the treatments--"

Nny "I'm sorry, treatments?"

Devi "... I was diagnosed with breast cancer a few years ago. Lost ol' lefty."

Nny "Jesus Christ, Devi! You're so young for... I hadn't even noticed the-- I'm sorry--"

Devi "It's fine. I survived, obviosly. I'm not as devistated over it as you might think. I mean, at the time it was REALLY terrifying. I told myself it was no more terrifying than my soul and creativity being consumed by Sickness or almost being stabbed to death in your shitty bungalow, but, cancer is her own Sickness. Obviously; by Sickness, I'm referring to--"

Nny "I know exactly what you're referring to."

Devi "Yeeeup...*sigh* I broke up with Tyler because treatments took so much out of me. I felt like shit. I looked like shit. I couldn't emotionally handle anything, so I sat him down one morning and explained how I felt...and he told me "Okay, we'll take a break, but I'm still giving you a ride to St. Poop tomorrow...", He's the first guy I ever met who actually... respects me. He values me; he puts me first, even after the surgery. I'd be a fucking idiot not to do this."

Nny "...I'm glad he's good to you. I hope you're happy and healthy together for a long time."

Devi "Thank you. Thanks for listening to me vent too."

Nny "I owe you that much. I'm sorry, for everything. I wasn't going to kill you. Or at least, I never wanted to allow myself to attempt it EVER again. I need you to know that.

Why did you come to my house that night?"

Devi "Because you stalked me for months and I wanted to confront you. I wanted you to leave me the fuck alone. I had just rid my life of Sickness at the time and I was feeling ballsy.

I would have killed you myself to make that happen, I want you to know that."

Nny "Fair enough... I really am sorry for the trauma I've branded you with for life. I told myself I had to make one last attempt to tell you how I feel about you, but now that I'm actually standing here, looking you in the eye, asking you for forgiveness and...I realize now what a selfish peice of shit I'm being."

Devi "Just now you realize this?"

Nny "I didn't want you to remember me as the crazed lunatic who tried to cut you open just to immortalize my own happiness. I want you to remember me as the awkward young beaky fuck who was trying WAAAAY to hard to sound deep and impress you... That night we went out together was the best night of my life. You gave me one RALLY good night...

But you deserve much better memories. You sure as fuck don't deserve cancer."

Devi "NO ONE DESERVES CANCER!! No one DESERVES being hacked to bloody chunks!! No one deserves to be bullied or harassed or raped or mental illness or poverty or half the other bad shit that happens in this world! Bad things happen! Bad people shouldn't exist, and yet... I don't know where I'm going with this."

Nny "Mmmm...Let's agree to disagree about the hacking people into bloody chunks part."

Devi "....Have you been wearing that tie this WHOLE time?..."

Nny "Yeah...I don't know why I dressed up. No one can see me-"

Devi *laughs hysterically* "...I did used to really have fun talking to you. I'll try to block out the murder attempt and focus on the laughs."

Nny "I lo-"

Devi "DON'T... I forgive you as long as you DON'T fucking say it to me."

Nny "Okay...Congratulations, Devi. Goodbye..."

Mem "This is terrible for your health. I always feel guilty when I bind you, my Tallest."

Miyuki "Beauty is labor intensive. No way around it. You're doing a fine *gasp!* job... Mem--?"

Mem "Yes, my tallest?"

Miyuki "What do you think of males?"

Mem "Males, my tallest?"

Miyuki "The dominant gender; what do *gasp!* you think of them?"

Mem "I hardly think of them. There's so zikking many of them, I'm just habituated to their existence. Excuse my tongue, your grace."

Miyuki "Hm. Do you consider them untrustworthy?"

Mem "It depends on the male."

Miyuki "Would you consider them disposable?"

Mem "Is not all Irken life standing below tallest stature disposable?"

Miyuki "I would argue against that logic. Personally, I consider all Irken life valuable. United we stand and all that."

Mem "That's very progressive thinking, your grace."

Miyuki "Though, value is relative."

Mem "Is this about High-General Spork? A kiss is hardly newsworthy, my Tallest. In 10 years or less no one will remember that broadcast. Tallest Lich bit the head off a smeet on a live stream and the empire still saluted him."

Miyuki "Lich was a male."

Mem "That's...very true."

Miyuki "Do my subjects respect me? I know YOU do, Mem, but what is the general opinion?"

Mem "You're the most adored tallest to rule this millenia."

Miyuki "But am I RESPECTED?"

Mem "There will always be defectives to make your reign challenging, but the vast majority of your empire thinks highly of you, your grace. My service to you these past two centuries have been a pleasurable and fulfilling experience."

Miyuki "I worry. I've accomplished so little."

Mem "Because of you, the mightiest warship in the universe is under construction. The Irken population is up a quarter shmilion. The empire will conquer entire galaxies someday thanks to you, my Tallest. You CARE about your elite and your servants. I know because it was obvious Lich only cared for himself when I served him. I mean this with upmost sincerity when I tell you, it's an honor to be your coordinator."

Miyuki "Awww, Mem...I envy you. You're so wise and beautiful; the kind of beautiful that doesn't require first era torture methods to emulate. It wouldn't shock me if your dna derived almost completely from the omnipotent mother control brain herself."

Mem "I've never seen one of the control brains. Is her mother brain beautiful, my Tallest?"

Miyuki "Her rebirth brain vessel terrifies me, but in her Irken-birth vessel her beauty was unmatched. I would give anything to possess her immaculacy and strength. She is forever engraved in my consciousness; I dwell on her alot here lately."

Mem "I..um...I'm... flattered you think I resemble her mother brain, my Tallest. For what little it's worth, I think you're beautiful without the binding and corsets."

Miyuki "Perhaps, but tradition is tradition and standards are set. Are you almost done?"

Mem "The trickiest part is over with, your grace."

Miyuki "I don't want to address the elite today. I just want to stay in my chambers and be held...Mem, come here."

Mem "But, m--"

Miyuki "I didn't say "come here later,"."

*hugs tightly, nuzzles* "Mmmm.... You're so soft."

Mem "Thank you, your grace."

Trigger warning for those of us with depression

-bleep.

---Damn it, if you didn't want to come see me in the cook off, why didn't you just say so?! I kept looking at the audience all night thinking this is the moment you'll walk in and start cheering for me, but... The last chip was eaten and the last sip of cyder drunk and you still weren't there.

Maybe the new snacking system didn't mean anything to YOU, but it...it......It doesn't matter. You were right, Zim. Soo-Garr was promoted to head frylord for the massive. She fired me. I turned in my apron...

She was never going to make me her apprentice. You tried to warn me but I was so determined or stupid...Probably just stupid...

--bleep

--Please don't hate me for this. Frylord Sizz-Lorr offored to continue my training on Foodcourtia. He said he's willing to be my mentor. He was your least favorite boss, but I really don't want to quit cooking. I'm so bad at EVERYTHING, but I'm GOOD at making food. I know I am. I mean, I think I am...maybe I just think I'm good at it because I love to do it...

Lord Sizz-Lorr says I could be great one day. He says I remind him of him as a smeet and he can help me master my skills the way Soo-Garr couldn't.

I hope he's right. What if I let him down too? What if all I ever do for people my whole flesh-life is disappoint them...?

Sizz-Lorr is waiting for me in his ship. I need to sign off. If you ever do decide to come looking for me, I'll be frying it up at Shloogor's. I'll try to call again after I'm settled.

--bleep

--*harsh static* And that's how I learned edible zikkies don't crawl.

--bleep

--It's Gir again. Are you even still in the solar system? I know you're still in range because my messages keep going through. By the way, I'm still mad at you...There's just no one left to talk to. Everyone's abandoned me. You left, Soo-Garr gave me the boot now all my friends got scattered across the empire for their next level of training.

I haven't heard from Yeet or Vroog in almost a year. Last I knew Vroog was sent to Devastis. Yeet got sent to Hobo13. She was so excited when she made rank, but I worry she might get hurt. They won't ever call me again, will they?

I know they're busy and they're not trying to hurt my feelings. They had to leave me. Maybe that's just how Irkens are; they give away what they cherish and leave behind who they love. It sure seems like it. I would never do that to them though...or you. Maybe I'm not really Irken after all. Or I'm just a crappy one. I dunno...

--bleep

--Still no word from Vroog or Yeet...or you. I miss them all the time. I miss you too. I don't understand why you won't talk to me anymore. Whatever I said or did, I'll never do it again. I promise...

I'll call again on lunch. You probably won't hear from me as often now. I started working double shifts ar Shloogor's because...what's the point of taking days off if I have no friends to chill with? Talk to your voicemail soon.

--bleep

--Hi, Zim... I'm probably bothering you. I'm sorry, it was just a bad day. I blinded myself with the flash fryer earlier. It's not that bad, but the medic still sent me home. I'll be back in the kitchen by tomorrow's dinner rush. You messed your eyes up worse that time we were stuck in the city and you tried to watch earth's sun to find east. *giggles* You remember, right...?

I've been thinking about Earth a lot lately. Maybe I'm just lazy or lack discipline, but I miss the old days watching terrible human programming on the couch with you. It's so quiet and boring here with you gone.

I regret so much... I'm sorry I got us lost our first week. I did mess up your invasion plans alot. If I could take it all back and do better I would. Maybe we could have salvaged that BS mission.... I don't know if you still care about that anymore.

I'm a cursed object. Sizz-Lorr had to give me a sick day to heal, so now he's stuck working the lunch rush by himself. He probably wishes he never took me under his wing and I don't blame him.

To you, I'm not Gir anymore. I realized that. I'm still me to ME though. I'm just in a different casing. I WISH to the control brains I wasn't. It doesn't seem to matter if I'm made of metal or flesh; I'm still a defective waste of space. I'm so afraid no matter what I do or how hard I try, I'll never be better. I'll always be the same scatterbrained, clumsy screwup that makes everything worse.

I hate being me. I wish I was never born. I don't mean, like as a smeet. I mean, I wish I never existed at all. I wish I had stayed dismantled in the scrap bin in the Great convention hall.

It's not like it matters. Had I stayed inside a SIIR unit, I would have eventually wound up in a scrap pile again. All machines do. That's why you made Mini Moose, right? To eventually replace me? You never admitted it to me, but I knew...

Either way, I'm doomed. As an Irken the happiest ending I can hope for is to one day reach frylord rank, cook until I drop dead in my own kitchen and my apprentice drags me off for PAK removal.

Why didn't you just scrap me that week, Zim? Why did you bother to keep me around after the FIRST time I screwed everything up? Why...? *sobs gently

--bleep

--Hey Zim. I'm embarrassed about the other day. Hope you erased the last shmoopty message I--

-ignore

Part 3.

That is the last message Zim listens to before blocking Gir's transmissions and setting his ship on autopilot.

It's getting too hard for Zim to keep hearing his voice. Gir keeps hitting too close to home for him.

Yes, before Zim crashes on earth, there is a side story that place during Tak, Tenn and Floog... further ideas for which I will jot down more ideas later. Lol

Rosie Rikki Simon's describes Gir as a broken character who is aware he is broken. It made me see Gir in a new light.

Dib "So that's it, hu? Your ship is fixed. You're just going to leave and hide out on Mars now?"

Zim "Until I decide where to go next. Are you devastated to watch Zim leave, Earth Monky?"

Dib "ME? I'm relieved. Reg is going to be heartbroken. He likes you."

Zim "the Dib-offspring will get over it. You did quickly enough."

Dib "you did too."

Zim "We HAD to."

Dib "Yeah... Your drifting through space alone plan sucks, Zim. Just saying."

Zim "I need to distance myself from the empire for a while."

Dib "That's.... Zim...* sigh*. "I'm going to hate myself for asking, but, why don't you stay with us here on earth?"

Zim "This planet is horrible. Beyond you and your little monkey-spawn I find no creature on this evolutionary stagnant sputch stain tolerable. The gesture is appreciated, but I MUST decline.

Zim "Why do YOU stay?..."

Dib "...I..."

(A continuation of the dialogue. Just trying to get it out of my head)