One of my favorite D&D gags that I ever came up with is part of a oneshot I've run a few times where the party is hired by a young wizard to help clear out a few active security measures in a tower that the wizard inherited from her old teacher.

The first obstacle to be cleared is the re-animated skeletons that the old wizard was using for gardening help. It's a pretty straightforward fight, but during the encounter, players may notice one particular raised bed of herbs that is set back in a corner of the garden by itself.

Upon further investigation, this one raised bed is absolutely shining with magical protections. There are runes carved into the wood of the bed, gemstones inlaid in the top of it, this bed is absolutely protected out the ass... and an arcana check shows that the protections are all pointed inward, attempting to keep what's in there from getting out.

What's growing in that raised bed, you may ask? What is so dangerous that the old wizard felt the need to place all these protections?

Mint.

okay! ready for round two on this thing

bullseyed the stuffing amount again 👍✨✨

YEAHHHHHH

okay, recipe!

PUMPKIN FILLED WITH EVERYTHING GOOD

ingredients:

first, chop the top off your pumpkin and clean it out like you're about to make a jack-o'-lantern. salt the naked insides of your pumpkin, and make sure you get the lid. mix together the dry ingredients of your stuffing, with more salt than you think you will need and plenty of pepper. (remember that the salt is for the entire pumpkin, not just the stuffing.) pat your rehydrated mushrooms dry and add them to the stuffing, turning to combine. I like to add my garlic to the cream and mix it together rather than adding it to the dry stuffing mix. either way, pack your pumpkin tight with the dry stuffing mix and then pour the cream over it. bake the pumpkin on a lined baking sheet at 350 F. bake 2 hours for a thin-walled pumpkin, or 3 hours for a thick-walled pumpkin. once it's done, pop the lid off and scoop the insides out with a large spoon to serve.

reblog to share some mint with your followers. just don't let it escape containment, okay?

This went from 300 > 700 notes in the past 2 hours wtf guys who SPREAD THE FUCKING MINT

Yeehawgust day 21 “white water rapids”

Fun fact I almost drowned in the middle Zambezi rapids when I was 13

Laios devouring a mandrake

Based on Francisco Goya painting ofc

Under communism all big mansions will be converted into big games of Clue

also-

And also

Please note. The orange one is not included because A. He isn’t a billionaire. And B. Calling him obnoxious is too kind for him.

there’s a lot going on here

https://abcnews.go.com/US/tiger-found-caged-abandoned-home-chance-wildlife-sanctuary/story?id=61130943

Tiger found caged in abandoned home gets second chance at wildlife sanctuary: ‘He seems to be so happy’

The estimated 350-pound tiger was transported to the facility, an affiliate of the Humane Society of the United States, on Wednesday afternoon, and is settling in well, Almrud said. There, he will have the chance to roam in enclosures of up to three acres.

Almrud, who estimates him to be about 2 years old, described the moment he first walked onto the grass at the sanctuary as remarkable.

“It was just amazing to see him walk out on grass and to see him explore and have that freedom of movement,” she said. “It was just such a reward and fulfilling to us.”

Now, he spends his days rolling around the grass in glee, Almrud said.

“He comes right up to the fence every time a staff member is present,” she said. “He seems very amenable to our presence.”

The tiger is eating well – a combination of chicken, humanely raised non-processed beef and whole prey complete with organs and bones. It appears that he was being fed chicken, which is what owners of exotic cats often feed them, but chicken alone does not provide the complete nutrition they need to thrive, Almrud said.

In addition, caregivers are tasked with keeping the tiger mentally stimulated by creating “pretend hunting” games and rotating him through different areas so he has access to new smells and environments to explore.

“He seems to happy and content,” Almrud said. “Our staff is just falling in love with him.”

Reminder that you can block most ads on Android. yes, including youtube ads.

Steps: Download Firefox -> Install uBlock Origin extension.

That's literally it. Enjoy ad free web browsing while we still (barely) have it!

Note: this works for browsing done in the Firefox app. It won't block ads in, for example, the youtube app. BUT, if you use Firefox to access youtube.com, congrats, no ads!

edit: also you can play youtube videos with the screen off/while using other apps. Just click three-dots -> Extensions -> Extensions Manager -> Video Background Play Fix

↑↑↑ reblog this version pls 😘

felt cute. might wander off into the woods and gnaw on some tree bark later.

Tumblr: do you want to add tags?

me: wtf am i supposed to tag this with. #tree bark, #gnawing? Legitimately how should one tag this?

#self care #cryptids #rodentiacore

IT'S TIME TO FLOP IN THE SLOP

no music 🎧

Traverse Board, ca 1800-1825

The traverse board (called rekenaar in Dutch, and renard in French) was used in northern European countries from at least the early 16th century until the 19th. By inserting pegs for the ship's direction and speed (as determined by ship's compass and the log and log glass), each half-hour (or hour) of the watch, the mean course and distance sailed could be determined.