desire is the root of heartache

sue did such a good job building that bathroom closet that i think she missed her true calling as a general contractor

running for president as a member of the American Fujoshi Party with a foolproof plan to address male loneliness

maybe it's because i was raised catholic but churches shouldn't look like furniture stores

if i was god and someone built and designed this place to worship me i would fucking smite them

you guys should just start frotting in the woods

frolicking *

where am i

i'm always saying this

Hi this is jigsaw. last week in starbucks you did a gross fucking burp that put me off my panini. In front of you is a panini press. You will notice also, that your dick is out,

how the world feels when you listen to a song for the first time and immediately know you'll love it forever

see, you and i? we’re like spunchbob and patrice

Gay

that’s his snail