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#bullying – @macmanx on Tumblr
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MacManX Aside

@macmanx

Support Team member at WordPress, GIF maker on Tumblr, Trumpet in Polyhedra, and general doer of things at place. (he/him)
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zingring
Anonymous asked:

Not the anon who mentioned it about the 'kill yourself' kind of thing towards staff, but I wanted to add this kind of language is thrown around in the general user to user talk as well and while I understand blocking can be an easy way to mitigate the problem, is reporting effective in managing that kind of attitude?

I've been on this site a little over ten years now and have witnessed or dealt with harassment of a similar degree. Any time I reported with screenshots I usually got an automated message simply suggesting to block said users ( which doesn't always help due to block evading existing) and to simply more or less try to ignore it.

I do appreciate the updates surrounding blocking and especially the anon hate update given that was a widely known problem, but in general, major aggression and language continually directed towards another individual fairly common but, to my knowledge, not punished.

Is there any way or plan to fix that or am I simply not seeing it happen? I haven't had to report anyone in a long time so I might just not be seeing it. Also, what is the stance on callout posts or targeted harassment? If someone lists a user in their DNI or on their blog and that user gets harassed because of it, is that a reportable / bannable offense? I'm really trying to understand how tumblr deals with people who are just mean to be mean.

Hey there,

In the past we have been really inconsistent about terminating the accounts of the people who use "kill yourself" type of language. We are much more consistent about that now. It's unacceptable behavior. We do try to take context into account, but mostly these are obvious. We do rely on users to report! So please start back up again.

Blocking is always an option, but really we want to better identify users who are engaging in bullying and harassment so we can either give them appropriate warning or terminate their accounts (depending on severity, number of instances of bad behavior, etc). That's where reporting comes in. Note the bit about "appropriate warning" - that means you may not see that we've taken action, but we have.

Also, you may already have connected the dots here, but since we now require users to be logged in to send Anonymous Asks, we can look up who sent them. We don't, but will if there's just cause. Also, I've never looked up anyone who has sent me an Anonymous Ask. I respect that need for privacy (even when the Ask is vengeful or mean).

In terms of callout posts, harassment, etc, if you're unsure but think it could be violative just let us know via the Abuse form. That includes targeting of any kind (as you describe), but could include other behavior. We'll take a closer look for you.

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macmanx
Be Kind
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I'm not going to reply publicly because I'd inevitably get accused of bullying for failing to protect the sender from the consequences of their actions when my followers got a hold of them.

But if you're going to send me a message along the lines of "I like your novel, but I ran it through a filter, and you use too many adverbs, you should consider using less" I hope you know I'm killing you with my mind.

Just mentally holding you underwater until the thrashing stops.

Hope that helps.

I'm going to be honest here, I truly do not understand this "I'm blocking out their username/not replying to protect the guilty" thing. They're the anal polyps who said something heinous and/or stupid. What precisely is wrong with letting them have to face the consequences of their own actions? Why is pointing out how much of a shit stain they're being considered bullying, but their being a shit stain is not considered a moral failing somehow?

Maybe this is just brain damage for a childhood and adolescence spent getting in trouble for fighting after getting my ass kicked by bullies, who themselves did not get in trouble for the same event.

You are correct. They are the person in the wrong here. However, there are certain types of people on this hellsite who, when their bad behavior is called into question, will turn around and claim bullying---especially if the person calling them out on it happens to be a 'big name' blog.

In this instance, my replying publicly to them would be twisted into ME bullying THEM because no matter how gentle or civil I might be to them, I have no control over my followers, and inevitably someone would say something nasty, and it'd turn into "waaaaah, Ms. Joy replied to the message I sent her, and now I'm the victim of my own actions. SHE should have known better not to reply publicly. SHE's a big blog. boohoo, poor me."

It happens fairly often, which is why when you DO see me reply to someone publicly, I'm likely at my fucking limit and am done being polite.

This is the worst online behavior ok, like, literally what is bullying here if you’re literally facing the consequences of your actions, consequences that you knew would happen because u use the website

The bullying tends to come, like I said when other people start behaving not so nice toward them as a result of me publicly posting it.

Sometimes it's not genuine bullying. Sometimes people just perceive being told, "Hey, you did something wrong," as being an attack. But there are times when things get out of hand, and the feedback they get is disproportionate to their actions and can become genuine bullying and harassment.

Those are the kind of interactions I'm trying to avoid.

Of course, there's also the flip side of this, where people intentionally try to start shit with me to get me to respond so they can face harassment. Usually, because they want to whip out a victim card or point the finger at me and go, "See, she IS a big meanie. I told you I was justified in not liking her."

THOSE are the people I'm talking about and "mocking" up above, and it happens WAY more often than people realize. I filter at least 5-6 messages daily from people who either know I won't post their name and, as a result, feel safe sending me heinous, harmful shit designed to hurt me, or they are hoping I'll snap and post a response resulting in them being able to cry persecution and go, "but you're the big blogger, you should know better."

And 9 times out of 10, I'm just expected to put up with it and if I vent about it, I'm being callous. Apparently. (<-- not aimed at anyone in the notes. This is just general frustration over how people tend to respond when I vent about these things.)

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jv
Sometimes people just perceive being told, "Hey, you did something wrong," as being an attack.

Sometimes it's even further then that. I've had people reblogging my posts about Tumblr saying things like "stop pretending staff is not full of Nazis and TERFs" out of the blue. And when I replied back saying that's bullshit, they went all "everybody! Everybody! Can you See this?? Can you see how Staff is bullying me???".

It's kind of a very unique tumblerism.

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macmanx

It’s definitely not unique to [tumblr]. Those of us in the US have been seeing this tactic from our elected leaders, often Republicans, so much that it’s becoming exhausting.

The playbook is:

  1. Hold a press conference to bully an individual or group.
  2. Receive a level-headed, sometimes dismissive, response from said individual or group.
  3. Hold a press conference to claim that you’re being bullied.
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“Since introducing this year's collection, we've experienced threats impacting our team members' sense of safety and well-being while at work,” a statement from Target reads. “Given these volatile circumstances, we are making adjustments to our plans, including removing items that have been at the center of the most significant confrontational behavior. Our focus now is on moving forward with our continuing commitment to the LGBTQIA+ community and standing with them as we celebrate Pride Month and throughout the year.”
Target will be removing select items from both its physical U.S. stores and online. Other merchandise, including trans-inclusive swimwear, has been moved to the back of stores and may be later removed completely.

Well that sucks. :(

Target has consistently had one of the best corporate Pride collections, featuring LGBTQIA+ designers rather than just rainbow-plastered bullshit, but fragile bigots are learning they can bully through violence, and well, it’s working.

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reblogged

john green is back on tumblr so heres some things we’re NOT gonna do okay.

we are NOT going to make jokes about the time he got bullied off here the first time. it was fucked up then and its fucked up now. (that includes jokes about the infamous cock post. you would think it goes without saying but apparently not :/ )

we are NOT going to bully him. its mean and he’s here for a good time same as everyone else. cyber bullying is still cyber bullying if someone is a well known author.

okay? okay. 

Reminder: if his presence is that much of a Big Damn Problem for you, do the thing you should have done in the first place and hit the damn block button. It’s not hard.

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wilwheaton

just found you mentioned in an Austrian article about mastodon. translation of your bit: "And there are also negative incidents: For example, the actor Wil Wheaton (known as Wesley Crusher in the "Star Trek" series "The Next Generation") was kicked off a server because some people don't like him and apparently reported him so often about alleged violations to the server operator that he was excluded. The sheer number of messages is said to have overwhelmed this server administrator."

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Yep. I was 100% bullied and brigaded off a server, because it was amusing to some number of children to do so.

Thing is, I can walk away and it doesn't matter to me. But when those same people do the same thing to someone without my privilege, it can be devastating to them in a lot of ways. That's a huge problem that none of these social networks seem to be willing to solve.

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