so this happened last night amd i was too tired to process how bizzare this was b ut

yeah. it is your bad.

i feel bad for the ppl who run horny fantasizing text post pornblogs i feel like theyre setting themselves up for so much disappointment if they ever actually have sex

IT’S POSSIBLE TO HAVE SEX THAT’S JUST AS GOOD AS YOU DREAMED IF YOU MEET THE RIGHT PERSON. Not easy for many reasons but possible I promise. At least to recreate the same feelings you’re looking for, in my experience

your bio says "never been fucked" im not sure if i trust the veracity of these claims

Liked for replier not op

thanks for the heads up

this ask tapped into an extremely primal part of everyone’s body soul & mind

you: suck my dick me, an intellectual: inhale my richard

here it is! the post that started a “me, an intellectual” hell frenzy, and is officially ⭐ the worst post of 2016 ⭐

Rare Achievement Unlocked:

Irrevocable Linguistic Harm

Create a memetic phrase that still sees use for almost a decade afterward

having to internalize the gender binary again so I can learn a new Romance language

Mfw the Duolingo owl reminds me carrots are female

one good thing about taking classes as an adult is that nobody gives a shit if you’re doodling

I had to find this post. I read this in 2017 and it had a profound effect on me. I couldn’t stop saying it. It was echolalia. And now to this day, for seven years, I can still quote it perfectly Word for Word and often do when I do something stupid. This is the perfect post in my opinion 

From a home on honeydewcraft

Y’all better fucking appreciate this it took me 5 hours to do the bricks alone

OH SHOOT ITS A PAINTING NOT A TEXTURE PACK

WHAT

I THOUGHT IT WAS A SCREENSHOT

Pussy corrosive. Pussy explosive. I look at that pussy, it’s what I need a dose of. Pussy eroding. Pussy abrasive. I look at that pussy, it’s what I need a taste of. Pussy be stinging. Pussy be hurting. Pussy be sizzling when it’s supposed to be squirting. Pussy disintegrating. Pussy dissolving. Pussy turning heads, that shit is revolving.

Pussy potent. Pussy persuasive. Pussy not local, that shit is invasive. Pussy feeble, pussy pathetic. This pussy ain't meta, this shit's diegetic. Pussy ambush, pussy boobytrap. Pussy equipped with a glock and a strap. Pussy not rude, this pussy's the meanest. This pussy's a pussy but it's also a penis

Pussy flexible, pussy twistable, pussy compelling, that shit's irresistible. Pussy bewildering. Pussy perplexing. Pussy be cursing and pussy be hexing. Eye of newt and turkey gizzard, drink a potion from the pussy wizard. This pussy tells the truth, this pussy tells lies. Can you see through my pussy disguise?

Pussy sopping. Pussy sweating. Pussy complicit, it’s aiding and abetting. Pussy disco. Pussy rave. Put that pussy on the radio waves. Pussy be zesty. Pussy be spiced. Serve up that pussy in a bowl with some rice. Pussy helter. Pussy skelter. I get more pussy than an animal shelter

hi

my coffin shaped locket is the perfect size to fit one singular ibuprofen

this is surprisingly useful actually

stop wasting space and add another

tres ibuprofenitos

¿En este economía?

girl, ESPECIALLY en este economía

Remind me later.

how it feels knowing that loneliness is still time spent with the world

Bewitched

Acrylic, 60x78cm

Embrace

it might just be because im sleep deprived from jetlag rn but this r/relationship_advice post is making me cry actual tears of laughter. i read the post at first and was like yeah pretty standard whatever but im nosey so i clicked on the drawing op linked and i was not mentally prepared for it. putting it under a read more so you can get the same experience as i did