crush my battle opponent's balls

I’m

this is us now

Rush Hour (1998) dir. Brett Ratner

How to do a race joke.

Ocean texting Harold Holt in Dec 1967

Anti-racist mural in Miami, Florida

why the fuck is tumblr so happy about 10% of the worlds trade cargo being blocked by a penis drawing ship ok nevermind it makes sense now that i typed it out

Found out an interesting tidbit from a streamer I watch (Central comittee on twitch) - it's registered in Panama (yes Panama papers Panama);

Basically the tawainese company (and countless others from all sorts of countrys) who owns the ship doesn't pay any taxes on it, but now we all foot the bill for both the delay and for fixing the issue.

Just another reason why tax loopholes are stealing from the people, more than the obvious "you should pay your fair share".

Yes🤍

aesthetic attraction is wild bc it’s like “yes i’m asexual but i’m also very gay and women are extremely hot”

so basically to summarise

shipment officers, gently nudging Ever Given with their 8 tugboats: Ever Given move out of the way please so you don’t block the entire global trade

Ever Given, her lamplights enormous: you SHOVE ever given? you shove her hull like the big boulder? oh! oh! no commerce for human! no commerce for human for One Thousand Years!!!

march 2020: there is a literal global pandemic the world has come to a grinding halt and u will be staying at home for a considerable amount of time. have fun baking banana bread and realising you're a raging homosexual and / or reinventing your whole lifestyle

march 2021: container ship draws a penis in the sea, crashes, and then blocks the suez canal with its fat ass, bringing a considerable amount of world trade to a standstill

jesus fucking christ look at all these fragile pieces of shit who can’t watch a movie with women and poc in them I'm💀💀💀

everyone who’s commenting “haha wouldn’t that leave like 5 minutes of the movie then😂😂” is missing the point SO hard

no, it wouldn’t. cutting all the female characters, poc and gay “rep” is actually….pretty easy. this guy did it and it’s still a solid movie.

you guys are giving marvel WAY too much credit. They don’t give a shit about representation, they don’t give a shit about you - the only thing they care about is money and looking Woke™

they did that by advertising how “progressive” they are for adding the first openly gay character ever!! let’s see when we can get an openly gay main character. or at least, dare I suggest, one that has a name.

they did that by hyping carol the fuck up and then only using her for 3 scenes

they did that by putting all the female characters in one shot for a Girl Power UwU scene; “oh look at us! we have all these female characters in one shot! we don’t hate women” isn’t that sad? that you can fit all your girls into one single shot? that despite your claims, all the girls combined still only have 116 minutes of screentime while the men have almost 400? isn’t that fucking pathetic?

it is. and look at this douche, look at all the assholes out there, this doesn’t mean SHIT to them, they take half an hour out of their day and cut a few scenes and boom - everything marvel claims is “progressive” is gone. none of their fake wokeness is important to the plot.

the gay character? who even is he?

T'challa and his family? their ~ 1 minute of screentime is easily cut

Sam becoming Cap? Where will we see that? In the show? Right. This person cut the scene and did that change the plot of endgame? the answer is no.

Carol? not much to cut since she was barely there

Natasha? The only thing she was good for is to die

Pepper? housewife. All he needed to do was cut the scenes where Tony washes the dishes and talks to Pepper, and cut Rescue’s, what, 20 seconds of screentime? and boom. ideal female, right?

Valkyrie? Oh she’s there alright, in the background, doing jack shit until Thor calls her queen in one scene, but does that scene mean anything? Do any of her scenes mean anything? Not to them. 10 seconds is all it takes and her scenes are all gone.

Nebula? kidnapped. dead

Gamora? insignificant. cut

you can’t mock this dude because “haha he has no movie left now 😂”. you gotta mock, no, hate marvel because that’s just the thing - he does. not a single poc or woman or lgbt person did anything that, if they left it out, the movie would make no sense.

and that’s just what he did. and yes, he’s pathetic for it, but don’t think marvel gives a single fuck about you. they don’t.

Aaaand someone said it … every single time a dude can make such a cut and the movie still makes sense, the movie has failed.

New rule: If you can cut all minority characters and women without losing plot coherency it is a failure. We can call it the Rian-Russo effect.

Reblogging again for the Rian-Russo effect!

THIS.

I stand by this message whole heartedly but also I thought this said “I can’t eat applesauce” and I was so fucking confused.

Were it not for ops comment i would not have known that says applause. I was ready to take this post at face value reading that shit as applesauce because thats just what you do on this bitch if a site

"Blokes don't always get it right" says man getting it wrong for the 12th consecutive time this month alone.

Scott fucking Morrison trying to be relatable to the average Australian by saying "blokes" and "have a go" and "good thing the footy/cricket is on" deflectiond other fucking whatever marketing ideas he and his $180,000 worth of empathy coaching can concoct is just vomit inducing. Fuck off you silver spoon inner Sydney elite prick. Suck on a big fat lump of coal with your over half a million per year comfy job while you give yourself fucking tax cuts while telling people who earn less than 20th of his wage to fucking stop being lazy. Shithouse "ScoMo" nickname to try and make this upper class man stuck in a rich man's bubble vaguely more relatable to the lower classes he holds nothing but contempt for. There's absolutely no reason to vote Liberal unless you're rich and want to avoid taxes and Scott bag of dicks Morrison exemplifies this in such obviously hideously vacuous and hollow terms. He's a privileged office man using his marketing experience to trick working class people into voting against their own self interests. Fuck his shrill ugly and empty facade.

MY TA SHOT SOMEONE IN THE FOOT AND THE PROFESSOR WAS SO FUCKING QUICK LMAOOO

some context 

1. my TA, Ralph, shot his girlfriend’s abusive ex in the foot

2. abusive ex was also a sex offender

3. he shot him when ex came buy to pick some stuff up from girlfriend and tried to take some of Ralph’s items as well

4. ex is stable and alive in a hospital

5. i didn’t do assignment 8 so i am very happy

some more Facts About Ralph

he is whiter then snow. this man is pure 100% american redneck in everything but the politics. this is intimidating if you dont know him because he owns like 3 different guns but also has animated discussions about “how his sister should be able to get married” when you bring up lgbt rights. his sister isnt even gay or trans or anything, he just thinks that LGBT rights also means that the lady should propose when she wants to. hes a little confused but he got the spirit. upon finding out that i am queer he said, word for word “THATS FUCKING RADICAL HOMIE” 

in the first week of school he snorted a line of pepper in the cafeteria and threw up.

the only other crime hes committed before was accidently dropping a weight from his balcony and cracking the sidewalk. which is technically destruction of public property but the judge basically laughed at him and have him 10 hours of community service

this man once walked me home when i stayed late at the lab and talked to me animatedly about breeding brine shrimp for different lab purposes. absolutely captivated by this discussion. i trust him with my life