my c3 faves
Episode 25 - Putting The Erotic In Necrotic
@vohalika and @notaficwriter are joined by surprise mystery guest @lulafia to behold the blatantly horny and absoutely glorious clusterfuck that is Critical Role Campaign 1 - Vox Machina Episode 25: Crimson Diplomacy.
Listen on:
“You're going to have to amend that one name, though, just to be fair. It's Lady Vex'ahlia.”
“Lady?”
“Lady Vex'ahlia, Baroness of the Third House of Whitestone and Grand Mistress of the Grey Hunt. So good sir, despite your relationship with her, do watch your manners.”
Laura Bailey’s “Makin my Way” version in the credits
Lyrics:
I’m makin’ my way. I’m makin’ my way.
From the top of this lowly hillside. Through the realm of the soulless Fey
I’m makin’ my way. I’m makin’ my way.
And all of us dread the trouble that lies ahead at the end of this wayward day
I’m makin’ my way.
CRITICAL ROLE GIF MEME - [5/5] Vox Machina Relationships ↳ Keyleth & Percy
If you open the right door in Whitestone you can find the Lady and Lord De Rolo. Or thinking about older perc’ahlia makes me feel things.
"who would win in a fight percy or caleb" im sorry but that is hydrogen bomb vs crying baby. percy has higher dex higher hp and sooo much damage output. its one round and caleb's out
who lied to you guys. just because caleb is ur fave does not mean he could beat THE percival de rolo in a fight
(tags via @notaficwriter)
That was going to save Vax. […] Sam, you were trying to save a Wish for me? Yeah.
do you ever just. think about how in cr1 after Percy went all No Mercy and killed for the second time Vex cornered and slammed him against a wall to confront him and they were implied to be close enough that Sam kept whispering for them to kiss? and they just. left it out of tlovm. rip to the animated show but the og stream had hot girl intimidation tactics and “Look me in the eye, Percy” and “I’m fine. You’ll know if I’m not” “I will”. fucking unmatched.
Sometimes youtube comments are good actually
hello, this is random but.. could u please tell me some of your fav things about vex? i don't often see people who Really Like Vex and we need more of that
Well, well, well, anon.
I have literally no idea how long it has been since you asked this of me, but rest assured I have not forgotten! Well, okay, I had for a while, then I saw it again and was like “oh, right, huh… And would you look at that, I’m about 100 posts away from 100,000… Wouldn’t that be a good one…”
So. Here we are! An unstructured rambling of all the reasons I really, really love Vex, somewhere between superficial and embarrasingly personal, to celebrate this arbitrary number of things I have spread around on this hell site.
- Okay, first of all, the only thing Laura had to say to Kit Buss for the official art was “make her hot”. That is a Statement. And boy did Kit and also everyone deliver on that.
- Like seriously. I didn’t use to be a fan of feathers in hair or white armor, but good god does she make it work.
- Hey, I said this was going to be extremely superficial
- Another thing I really didn’t use to like, twins. Overdone and usually poorly executed. But our girl made a Point out of being as different from her twin as she could be while at the same time being completely believable siblings.
- I swear to god I’ll do my absolute best to mention Vax as little as possible. This is not about him.
- Third thing I really couldn’t stand! The one, usually female, team member with a pet! Closely related to the one with the nature powers! I don’t know, these just always rubbed me the wrong way in media before, probably because I also never really cared for shows or movies about animals. Fight me.
- And yet here she is, and she is not the “won’t somebody think of the
childrenanimals!” type of gal and Trinket is amazing and it still ties into her personality on a larger scale without being preachy. - I have a fourth thing. I also really don’t care for elves, ever. Everybody hates them. And then she turns around and makes me cry about the elf thing. Good god.
- Yes, watching the first episode way back when was an uphill battle. There’s a reason I started with episode 69 and then watched the rest.
- Nice.
- Vex has the best worst sense of humor. No, really. I’m not even talking about that time she made a comment about the boy with the shot off fingers not having much of a future as a musician. But I’m also talking about that. And that time Scanlan tried having a meaningful monologue about having a daughter now. “I’ve defined most of my life by the people I slept with, and now…” - “Well, technically, this is still kinda defined by that.”
- (Shoutout to Percy “I was just thinking that”)
- Also, “We don’t do anything with dignity”, “I only serve gods with big dicks”, “You might live forever, but you will still be fucking ugly”? Girl is iconic, even if her sense if humor is usually pretty inappropriate for the given situation, she just can’t help it. I relate.
- On a related note, it is so easy to play a similar archetype and have her just be this always dignified and above the humor kind of stuck-up. It’s basically how most people would have written her (and a certain someone did). But not our girl, oh no.
- Also, I recently made a post about this, but we really, really don’t talk enough about how she’s just the leader of the party. She is. No, really, lower your bitch sticks, y’all. She’s the one to talk to the most NPCs, she’s the one to usually say go, and everyone just naturally adheres to her. It’s never forced, it’s never an “I, as the leader” moment, and she doesn’t try to wrestle her way into the role. It’s just what happens naturally.
- Which also means she’s good at stepping back and letting other people shine for a bit. But still, Vex is the reason they didn’t just flounder around like a chicken without its head after Scanlan left. Laura was late to two sessions in campaign one; the first one was already in an extended battle scene, and the other was literally spent in a bedroom in hell waitinig for Vex to tell them what to do.
- This is why scholars are generally of the opinion that Vex is the only Top in VM. And also what intellectuals refer to as Big Dick Energy.
- Let’s talk about what the assholes call Greed. Yes, Vex is, out of all of them, the most pre-occupied with gold and loot. But she NEVER hoards anything for herself, never spends any of her own gold on herself even until the timeskip, leave alone the party funds.
- She looks out for the interests of the group, makes sure they get the best possible deals and are paid what they are owed. And she’s the only one to ever worry about money, too, whereas everyone else never bothers to think about it. Hence why her and Vax split the cost of paying their staff after the party spent all the funds early on.
- Look, I find her worries very indicative of growing up in poverty with her mom, than surrounded by rich and important people but locked out of the loop, and then poor and on the road again with Vax. I find it very relatable, and everyone who claims that looking out for the financial well-being of the party is “greedy” is lucky enough to never have had to worry about eating next month while also making rent.
- There’s Safety In A Fist Full Of Diamonds, okay?
- No really I need y’all to read that and send it to the annoying bitches who complain.
- Vex is literally never stingy when it comes to helping people with the money she made sure they have. Remember how she didn’t even flinch at spending a five digit number to free angel boy slaves?
- WHICH LEADS ME TO ANOTHER POINT. Vex. Vex has a serious hoarding problem. But not when it comes to money of earthly possessions. No. When it comes to PICKING UP STRAYS.
- It’s how she got Trinket.
- It’s how she got the angel babies.
- It’s what she tries to do with the grey render baby.
- It’s what she suggested they do with the dragon eggs in the Raishan fight
- (LET! VEX! HAVE! PET! DRAGONS!)
- IT HOW SHE GOT HER OWN GODDAMN HUSBAND OKAY.
- I have no idea how she hasn’t adopted her own zoo by the time VM forms. Though I can totally see her opening orphanages in Whitestone, both for people and animals and creatures of all kinds, really.
- Remember when she was the only one to protest the punching of a spectral ghost cow?
- The hardships of her youth made her, yes, very afraid of being out of money, but also made her compassionate as fuck. She’s always down with helping people even if there’s little to no coin in it, okay? Stop overlooking that, assholes.
- SPEAKING OF COMPASSION. Remember what her original beef with the Vasselheim potion seller was? That he took advantage of Grog being intellectually challenged. Which is what he did! Blatantly so! And he wasn’t the least bit sorry about it!
- I mean, I bet he is by now, but, you know. Karma.
- When Laura says Vex just wanted justice and then everyone else escalated that scene she is goddamn right, rewatch your own footage Matthew.
- Oh god do I have to talk about broomgate now. I don’t want to talk about broomgate.
- OKAY
- Broomgate is literally the only time in the entire series that Vex ever takes something for herself. Was it the morally right thing to do? Maybe not. Though to keep in mind that a) Hardwick is a piece of shit, b) they literally met Gern when he had the skeletons of Kiki’s dead civilization dancing for him; Vax shanked Nothics for less, c) and this was hot off the heels of fighting a necromancer in the last big arc, too, d) they were on a mission to kill dragons. That fly. With no method of flying for the majority of the party. Vex always intended to use the broom for that purpose, so you could make the legal argument of commandeering it instead of stealing, and, finally, e) SHE HAD JUST FUCKING DIED
- Why do we never talk about that
- Other characters get cut all the slack for what they do after just dying
- Other characters get cut all the slack when they steal from other guests
- Other characters get cut all the slack when they withhold loot for the party
- Other characters DIDN’T GET AN ALIGNMENT DROP FOR DOING WORSE SHIT THAN THIS
- WHY ARE WE STILL TALKING ABOUT BROOMGATE
- WHY WAS BROOMGATE EVER EVEN A THING
- okay
- okay
- MOVING ON
- Hey, while we’re at dying. Remember how Vex spent the day after she, literally, died, trying to make sure the person who was to blame for her death was okay? She did that. And Percy was uncomfortable with it, visibly so, but also too guilty to call her out here.
- And no one. NO ONE. EVER. Bothered to check in on how she felt after dying.
- Vax made it all about the sacrifice he made, Percy felt too guilty, NO ONE ELSE CARED.
- And what does she do? Soldier on. Try and cheer Vax up and support him in any way she can.
- Honestly, learning the Raven Queen book by heart and then telling him that being the champion of a god is really fucking cool? Relatable. Relatable as fuck. You go girl.
- And TO THIS DAY. ACROSS TWO CAMPAIGNS. Vex has been the only one. THE ONLY ONE. To EVER check up on someone after they died. Jester might eventually be the second one, but, you know. I am a big advocate for post-death and just post-big-battle-in-general aftercare cuddle piles or whatever. Someone tell the cast to implement that immediately.
- And while we’re at death, let’s talk about THE DARKNESS
- There are dark facets to her character. Vex never makes her own issues everyone else’s problem and they go largely unadressed, but they’re there.
- Saundor brought up the story about how she got Trinket and had to kill for the first time while doing so.
(Sidenote: Saundor doing more research into her character than an actual writer is extremely telling.)- That was definitely traumatic for a young girl and I don’t mean to dismiss that, but that’s also the part I can understand Vax dismissing when they talk about it later on. They do kill a lot of people after that and this was self-defense, so hey, okay. Fine.
- HOWEVER
- That short story was indicative of many other things that torment Vex. Mostly her low sense of self-worth.
- Like, her entire inner monologue is centered around how stupid she was for getting into this situation in the first place (= for being taken advantage of by criminals at the tender age of probably like 15), and how this would never have happened to Vax, who was away in the city to take care of them.
- And we see that low sense of self-worth bleeding into Vex’s character throughout the campaign. That’s part of the reason why she spends the day after her first death making sure everyone else is okay. That’s also part of the reason she blames herself for Scanlan leaving and acts like she’s completely fine when he returns just so he’ll stay.
- Honestly that short story is so insightful and explains so much about her, I don’t know how anyone could claim to have any grasp on her character without reading it.
- (Also, Laura should write more, she’s talented)
- Now a significant part of her self-worth issues obviously also ties back into her time at Syngorn. I can just hear people getting out their tiny violins, oh, waaah, she wasn’t one of the rich, cool kids in elf school, poor her.
- But that’s not entirely it?
- Like, just that is already plenty to fuck a person up. I’ve been there, too.
- But let’s just say the fact that her dad was also cold towards them and acted like they were unworthy is a BIG part of what fucked her up. Call it daddy issues if you feel like being dismissive about a genuinely traumatizing upbringing, but that’s how it is.
- And don’t get me wrong, if this were the traumatic childhood olympics, it’s not exactly up there and relatively tame for the background of a character in a fantasy story, but it is very true to life and extremely relatable, and Laura just executes it so well. So, so well.
- That’s part of what makes the entire stretch of Feywild episodes so great. From what we see of Vax’s reaction later on, Percy is the only person she ever talked to about this - or at least the only one who ever listened - and he immediately got it. And instead of yelling at her about how amazing she is, he did something to make her feel better about herself. Without making it about himself, by the way.
- I enjoy a fake married plotline as much as the next gal, but Percy giving her a title she’d have to earn by her own merits is soooo much more meaningful than just putting a fake ring on her, okay?
- Yes, at the end of the day, this is basically a Cinderella fantasy. So what? No, really. One of the best things about Vex and her arc is that it validates feeling upset about not measuring up in superficial, material ways. And it validates getting your come-uppance. These are, as mentioned above, experiences that can really mess with a person, but we’re usually supposed to be above it all because money and titles don’t make you happy.
- Also something only people who never struggled financially can say/believe unironically and without specifying.
- Hell, that’s about 70% of the reason I’m considering getting a Ph.D. if I happen to get the grades.
- I’m also not a big fan of the term daddy issues, but I can’t deny that this is a thing here
- not the thing they went into the Feywild for, buuuut
- ahem
- So. Remember when Laura said during the campaign wrap up that Vex thought of Scanlan as a father figure and everyone was like whaaaaat? And I was like ahahahaha, I knew it.
- This is so tragic, really. Because she tried so hard so many times to help Scanlan and be nice to him and he just brushed her off. And then she’s the one who volunteers to spend the night all by herself in some dirty pub far, far away after opening up to his daughter about her own issues to bring him back alive, and then gets yelled at, and never apologized to.
- And then he comes back and tries to erase her memory and not only is that never even brought up, she also just doesn’t even think she might be owed an apology because a) she still blames herself for him leaving because, you know, they never really talked out what happened there and b) she’s just too happy for at least that father figure returning to them to make much of a fuss about it, and Percy, bless his heart, TRIES, but it’ll take a few more years of marriage to talk through all of her issues
- And like. I am not wild about anything that happens after episode 99. If I’m known for anything in this fandom on this platform it’s probably for that time I was really into the Ioun discourse, which I still stand by, btw. And I personally would have preferred for Vex to maybe get someone like Sehanine as her patron, as fitting as giving her yet another unworthy and disapproving father figure in her life might be
- But there is also something somewhat gratifying about everyone talking about how great she is. And she had been sort of working for Pelor before that. Also, the headcanons about her having sun spots or starting to glow when she gets emotional after this are amazing.
- So I made my peace with that. She deserves better, but hey, she always does.
- She is so smart. So extremely smart. People roll their eyes at her battle plans and say it’s all Travis feeding Laura information, but Travis fed her nothing that time she schmoozed up to the Briarwoods while also making herself appear extremely superficial and unthreatening. Honestly. That dinner scene? Prime Vex. Amazing Vex.
- Her battle plans are also so good. Pokeball-ing Grog out of the kill box? Using the Goristro against Vorugal to save the party a trip into the abyss? The only plan of Vox Machina that ever worked out basically perfectly? Amazing. And even IF Travis told Laura these ideas, that means literally nothing in relation to how smart Vex is.
- And btw I don’t believe that for a second. People just aren’t good with acknowledging that sometimes, D&D playing women might actually have good ideas.
- And she just is so street smart. With her skills, her battle plans, and just her way of handling people. There’s a reason she is the natural leader when it’s not someone’s turn in the spotlight at the time.
- Like, the two things holding her back were that her class was extremely underwhelming, so much so that it got completely revamped in the Unearthed Arcana to make up for how bad it was in the PHB, and the fact that she just. Has, what. 1.5 episodes of her own storyline? Even Pike got 2. It’s amazing that I can even say this much about her with how little narrative focus she got throughout the series. And most of what she did was literally due to Percy using his plot clout and putting a foot in the door to force her into the spotlight.
- Speaking of which. Percy’s best quality, next to being self-aware of how fucked up he is and actively trying to do better and be kept in check, is how he realizes Vex is the coolest, smartest, most amazing person around and treats her accordingly. The way she deserves to be treated.
- Oh hey I mentioned to get this far without even mentioning the romance arc. And oh my god THE ROMANCE ARC. The pining. The slow burn. And the fact that we actually saw them together and later married for like 35 episodes. They were so good for each other.
- And yes, PERCY WAS GOOD FOR HER. And Vex was not his therapist and manic pixie dream girl. None of that bullshit here. Percy was already firmly on the path to being better before he even considered that crush he has had on her for forever to turn into something more.
- And by he was good for her I mean that he actually UNDERSTOOD her and where she was coming from. Refer again to the titling issue, where Vax is just confused and kind of pissed, Percy got it. And that’s important.
- Something I have not made a post about so far, by the way, is also something people have called problematic and co-dependant is how Percy shares his darker impulses with Vex in hopes she’ll talk him out of it. Which she does, and it’s never hard, but that also means so much to her? Because he involves her and tells her exactly what is going on with him and values her opinion? And that is just exactly what she needs? And they’re so good? THEY’RE SO GOOD.
- WHEN DOES YOUR OTP EVER
- HE COULDN’T HAVE ASKED FOR A BETTER DREAM
- This is more on Laura, admittedly, but also, it was just so great to see her unapologetically pursuing this romance? There’s a place at the table for a 72 episode slow burn, and she’s gonna go for it, and there’s nothing any of the dudebros who are just here for the fighting can do about it.
- And also Vex is just so unapologetically sexual at the same time. From episode 1 onwards, really, and in general and just limited to Percy. And no one ever treats that as weird or bad or anything. It’s just who she is and that’s great.
- And she fought. So hard. For that happy ending of hers. Kicking and screaming, against the world and against Taliesin’s determination that Percy is irredeemable and not capable of getting a happy ending. Defy that auctorial intent, my girl. You deserve it.
- Seriously. Seeing her get that happy ending against all odds was unfathomably gratifying and validating and I’ve never connected to any single character or narrative at large for that matter this much and this intimately, and considering how I came across this story at one of the darkest times in my life, I probably never will feel so strongly connected to anything ever again.
- Which is probably for the best, but hey.
Aaaand there you go. An almost unstructured, epically long list of reasons I love Vex. Dammit, I talked about other characters way more than I intended, buuuut hey. That’s how it goes when you’ve got an ensemble piece, they’re all kinda interwoven.
Thank you this wonderful ask, anon, and reason to celebrate my 100,000th post on this site in style.
a rare moment of perc’ahlia having fun that i did for a gift exchange with @katia-dreamer <3
(click for better quality)
five years gone – i was invited to be part of critical role’s critmas holiday gallery back in 2018, and this is the piece i drew for it.
[ID in alt text]
🕯️Happy Holidays to those who celebrate it, may it be warm and light, and full of love and comfort 🕯️
I made this drawing for the CR Holiday Postcard exchange!