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#jon has a special earpiece to have an ultra low song volume – @lolottes on Tumblr
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ZzZzZ

@lolottes / lolottes.tumblr.com

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hypewinter

You know a job parents everywhere are always in need of? Babysitters. You know who did pretty good (ish) job on his parenting assignment, can be anywhere in the country in a matter of minutes, and is desperately wanting the new Doomed game? Daniel Fenton. You know who starts using this most excellent service the most? Superhero parents.

Danny: of course Mister Batman Sir, I an stop him from sneaking out and patrolling for you.

Batman: hmmn. Robin: Father, I do not need a babysitter. I can join you on this mission. Batman: mmm. Danny: I don't know what that grunt means but my prices are 8 dollars an hour and an additional 10 dollars per escape attempt and if he attempts to harm me- Robin: Tt. I would not attempt, I would succeed. Danny: ahem. If he attempts to harm me then I'll add another 3 to 15 dollars based on the severity of the attack. Batman: What would constitute the 15 dollars?

Danny: Trying to skin me and mount me on a wall, trying to dissect me or trying to rip me apart molecule from molecule. Batman: It is worrying that you would only charge 15 dollars.

Danny doesn't hear the "only" : I mean, I can do 10?

Batman:....give me an itemized account detailing the acts and you'll be paid accordingly

Danny, mentally freaking out: ok

Batman thinking - I'm going to pay him well. $15? He should get at least $300. Thats fair right? :) : hnnn

Danny: $300 for only one stabbing attempt? this guy clearly gave me too much money. i need to return it to keep my reputation as an honorable babysitter.

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meepmoopmaap

Batman: Oh he must've felt like he didn't deserve the money. Eh I'll sneak it back into his bag next time.

thus begins the back and forth of them giving each other copious amounts of money without talking to each other about it.

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bet-on-me-13

You know who else hires Danny? Superman. He needs Jon to stay home sometimes, especially when there is a Big Threat on the loose or Lex is up to his usual tricks. He does not want his son to have to deal with Kryptonite Poisoning at such a young age.

Danny: Okay Mr Superman, we're all good. I usually charge $8 an Hour, with an additional $10 per escape attempt, and $15 for attempted attacks. But your son seems well mannered, so I'll lower it to 5 per escape attempt and 20 per attempted attack.

Clark: Oh no, I could never ask that of you. In fact I feel like this is a very low amount for the service you are providing me. I'll make it 13 an hour, with 15 and 20 for the other 2 stipulations.

Danny: Oh no I must insist sit. My Prices are set, and I cannot in good conscience ask you to change them.

Clark: But you aren't asking me, think of this as a courtesy.

Danny: I'm sorry Sir, but I simply must insist.

Basically you put 2 Well Mannered Country Boys up against eachother in a Humbleness Competition. Neither of them is willing to "inconvenience" the other, and will not back down in being more neighborly.

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lolottes

While Clark and Danny argue, Jon makes his first escape attempt under the telephone encouragement of Damian, still salty about having failed to escape last week.

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