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#why exactly is being insulted by a homophobe any less insulting – @lilietsblog on Tumblr
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Aremo Shitai Koremo Shitai Onna no Ko ni Mietatte

@lilietsblog / lilietsblog.tumblr.com

Wow, it's been like 10 years since I updated this. Neat. I've made a dreamwidth blog just in case tumblr dies. I think dreamwidth is neat. My username on Discord is Liliet#1061 (and no I don't intend to update it, they're asking but they haven't tried to force me yet). My username on reddit is LilietB. Read PGTE. Homestuck is great. Peace and love on the planet Earth. I'm Ukrainian. Wish us luck.
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lagoonhag

can straight girls please stop shitting their pants over being mistaken for lesbians or being called lesbians as an insult?

when someone tries to insult you by calling you a lesbian, they’re a homophobe. if you actually find it insulting to be called a lesbian, you’re a homophobe too. this is not a difficult concept to grasp.

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theothin

ok I get what this is going for but “can people stop being upset over x” is not a good approach

"if you actually find it insulting to be called a lesbian, you’re a homophobe" is exactly the same as saying "if you actually find it insulting to be called a man, you’re a misandrist"

and yet a lot of people, such as transwomen, DO have reasons to take issue with being called a man without actually hating men

the reasons things bother people are complex and depend on the person’s own personal mindset and experiences AND THAT DOES NOT CHANGE JUST BECAUSE THE PERSON IS STRAIGHT OR CIS OR ANYTHING ELSE

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lilietsblog

When I was in the kindergarten, other kids found it funny to come up with insults based on my surname. It's not even unusual. I was called Beard, Ballerine, Bread. None of those were actually insulting by themselves, you know? Yet I did feel insulted each time those were used instead of, you know, my actual name. Because those kids' intent was to insult. I wasn't bothered by the actual words themselves - none of those were in any way bad - but I was hurt because they were being purposefully mean to me.

If a straight guy calls a straight girl a lesbian, meaning it as an insult, there are lots of reasons for the girl to be offended without her being in any way homophobic. Not even mentioning the whole "he purposely insulted her" angle, the girl can be offended on behalf of her actually lesbian friends who she doesn't feel are in any way inferior to her. The girl can be insulted by an underlying idea that girls only have value as commodities to guys and lesbian girls are therefore useless, if that's what the guy meant. The girl can be insulted by an underlying idea that straight girls are feminine and if a girl is unfeminine she must be lesbian. There are so many layers of heteronormativity and gendernormativity and just vague societal sexist bullshit at work, depending on the situation, the very idea that someone would decry a girl for being offended...

are you trying to defend your inalienable right to call girls lesbians regardless of their actual orientation when you want to, or what

I mean if a girl was, like, making out with another girl for some reason and then had issues with being assumed lesbian instead of straight, then yea, the girl probably has problems - then again, she might be irked by bi&pan erasure in such an assumption...

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