Azarix

Rai: I raised a perfectly well-behaved, functioning son.

Brandon: You have a son I don't know about?

Nikolai: I-

Damien: Niko just asked me, 'where do babies come from?'.

Rai: His too young, tell him the stork.

Damien, to Niko: Your mom fucked a stork.

Kyle and Rai:

Kyle: I'm never allowing you around my kids again.

[Rai and Kyle letting Damien babysit Nikolai]

Rai: And if you feed the baby grapes, make sure to cut them in half.

Damien: *visible confusion*

Kyle: The grapes, Damien.