librinaut

for warmer days ahead

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Sketch a day 183

Just finished playing Firewatch, so I was inspired to paint this!

mittsvenskatorp

Me, years ago: idk it just seems like every time I’ve heard a man say he was being abused by a woman it turns out he was actually abusing her. Is it wrong to just assume that’s the case anytime I hear a man say that since I’ve literally never seen it be actually true?

Commenters: omg that’s so fucked up. Maybe educate yourself on domestic abuse from experts before you go saying things like this??

Experts on domestic abuse: When a man says he is being abused by a woman, you should assume he is abusing the woman in question and wants your help to keep her in line. Abusive men often use this technique in professional settings such as therapy, and it’s important not to buy into it for even a second.

The domestic violence training I went to a few days ago was meant for an audience of EMTs and law enforcement, and the two detectives heading the presentation literally said this. They obviously acknowledge that male victims of female abusers do exist and do deserve help, but the odds of this scenario are slim. They've seen men bash themselves in the face to incriminate their female victim when the latter calls 911. They went over in aching detail how male abusers will buddy up to first responders and play the victim, because they know from experience that it often works. Often, these male abusers will beat their victims to the phone to call for help...for themselves and their self inflicted injuries which they blame on their wives or girlfriends.

They also love to hit and beat their victims until the victims finally retaliate with a small slap or push. Then, predictably, the abusers will tell anyone who'll listen that they are the abuse victim.

One of the presenters said he'd literally gotten camera footage of a male suspect acquainting his fist with his face while pretending to scream as his bruised and battered wife was on the phone with 911, and then, when the cops showed up, he came crying about how she'd beaten him. The idiot did it all in view of his ring camera.

They are very predictable. Unfortunately, there's a reason they're so confident in their tactics: those tactics work on law enforcement, which is permeated with misogyny.

And, doubly unfortunately, I could add all the disclaimers about how male victims truly do exist and deserve help, etc.,....and yet some people will still choose to read this as hatred towards them.

(btw, you know who's usually the perpetrator of DV on male victims? Other men.)

Illustration: Kathy Lam

Imagine Me & You (2005, UK)

Domestic by Catherine Opie - lesbian couples in their home environment across the United States

come closer. i am a normal moth

:))

Oh to be a little animal living in a tree

Both images are by Italian illustrator and cartoonist Franco Matticchio

summer dinners in the yard

Alexander Jansson