whenever i'm trying to talk myself out of buying something i don't need i always hear my old russian professor's voice echoing in my head: "WHAT??? WILL YOU DIE THE RICHEST MAN IN THE GRAVEYARD?" and then i make an unwise financial decision

i'm so glad i happened to see these tags this is the best thing anyone has added to this post so far

Griffin McElroy just casually dropped the line "our bodies are choirs, and we are the song they are singing" and then just. Went back to playing DnD. As if that's just a thing normal people say between dice rolls.

Ethersea is so underrated.

ignore the smudge

I laughed so fucking hard at this

teehee it's a gilded fuck!

The devastating difference between how much time it takes to write something vs how fast people read it lol

you're falling in the trap!! it will be read by many people, many times, and it will live on in their memories. and maybe no single other human will match you in time spent dedicated to your story, but as a collective we will outlast you. acts of creation only grow when they are shared

This. Writing is not like dinner. It can be consumed many times

Tshirt idea I had

and tendinitis

“I’m almost 50, and here is the best thing I have learned so far: every strange thing you’ve ever been into, every failed hobby or forgotten instrument, everything you have ever learned will come back to you, will serve you when you need it. No love, however brief, is wasted.” @louisethebaker on Twitter

No love, however brief, is wasted.

Apparently a part of the reason why farmed bees stay in the beehives that humans build for them is because the farm hives are safer and sturdier. I don't know how a busy Discord server's worth of bugs that only have one brain cell each would logically conclude that the humans protect them from outside threats, illness and parasites, but if I understood right, the bees would be free to move away and build a new nest somewhere else any time they'd want, and they simply choose not to.

You know how in almost every culture, people have some concept of "if I sacrifice something that I made/grew/produced to the Gods, they will ward me and my harvest from evil"?

So, in a way, don't the bees willingly sacrifice a part of their harvest to an entity not only far greater than them, but nearly beyond their comprehension, in exchange for protection against natural forces wildly outside of their own control?

So tell me, beekeepers, what are you to your bees, if not a mildly eldritch God?

I don’t know about other cultures, but in English folklore, when a beekeeper dies someone has to go out and tell the bees.

Imagine you’re a neolithic hunter-gatherer, just hanging out, sacrificing stuff to your god, when a new god you’ve never met before shows up and tells you that your god is dead, it’s not your fault or anything, and maybe a new god will come along to take care of you, maybe not, it’s gonna be touch and go for a while

Apparently in medieval Europe they also whispered secrets to the bees.

So imagine the mildly eldritch God you worship talks to you and tells you secrets, but these secrets make no sense to you and are incomprehensible to understand or even know they are secrets. But your God does make vibrations at you, so thats probably a good thing right??

Also occasionally the Swarm decides there is not enough room in the Hive because the eldritch god didn't take the offering of Honey at their normal time. So enough of a Swarm builds up that the second queen is able to leave without decimating the first Swarm. They are all set to search out a new place that will likely not have your God anymore (but really that's not too much of a struggle, they have abandoned you, that's part of why you've left, even though the first Swarm still holds out hope for their return).

And then, the scouts find another Hive right next to the old Hive. Literally right next to it. So the Queen lands to inspect it and wow, it's a good deal. The area already has enough food to support 2 Hives, so it's a not problem to stay in the area now that they have the space, but...this wasn't here before.

And then you see God, they've come to help the Swarm move to the new Hive and take the offering from the old Hive. Truly this must have been their plan all along

In English folklore, you ALSO have to invite your bees to your wedding, and decorate their hive, and leave a slice of cake for them, and also bring your new spouse by to introduce them to the hive straightaway. Imagine your eldritch god doing THAT.

#these polite beekeepers are just modeling the behavior they would like to see from their own god maybe? #perhaps if we could sting God he would tell us secrets

Me, on the welcome desk in the library: Good morning, how are you today?

Customer: I have welcomed Jesus into my heart and so I am well today and every day.

Me, a little unnerved: Okay then! Is there something I can help you with?

Customer, digging around in his bag and pulling out an iPhone in a box: Unfortunately, Jesus can't help me with this fucking phone, so I came to the library.

The Library!

For When Not Even God Can Help You!

1) why are you RIGHT

2) hotdong

3) bamhurger

Today I couldn’t remember the word “insubordination” so I told my mom my old supervisor accused me of “mutiny but not on a boat”.