Get the full story from the accuser first. See why they think this and all. It might be reasonable, it might not be. College students are ridiculously stressed (rightfully so) especially right now. Coronavirus has us all way messed up on top of regular classes and responsibilities. This will help you figure out if this is a viable claim or just someone who’s all over the place and taking it out on someone else.

Get the resident that’s accusing to make sure it’s not anywhere they could have misplaced it. The bottom of their backpack, their laundry hamper, their  underwear drawer, who knows.

Then, I’d suggest talking to the roommate (you or the resident, if you think the resident can handle that) and being like “Hey, so and so can’t seem to find their wallet. Have you seen it? Do you know where it is? This is really important to that person since money can be really tight in college.” before going straight for the accusations of theft. That will not only really fuck up the room dynamic but also create a shit ton of stress for everyone involved. Easier to avoid unneeded conflict is possible.

If you are dealing with what might be an actual theft, you probably need to talk to your area coordinator/senior RA/supervisor on how to move forward. That could get hella sticky if they aren’t willing to return it or if someone else stole it.

I’d try to make sure it’s not misplaced though if possible. (I lost my wallet for like a week and a half earlier this semester and it’s the fucking worst)

Oh lord. That’s a hell of a situation. I think the best thing to do might be to sit down and have a conversation. Lying about other people is an issue, no matter what their believes, and having a conversation about respect seems like it could be really important. If you feel uncomfortable on your own, you could reach out to your Area Coordinator (or equivalent) first and see if they can help you come up with a way to address this.

Different believes are one thing, but spreading lies about people is not alright. And if you have that conversation, make sure you address the part about respect more than their beliefs. Dialogue is important.

And honestly, you just have to remind yourself they’re people too and resist the urge to tear them a new one. (I have to resist the urge to pull down every trump sign I see still. I get really close some days)

Your beliefs are probably seen as extreme to them, so keeping that idea of respect people no matter what is really important. And if they start making threats, that’s probably a conduct issue that you can take to a higher level because people could fear for their safety. (You need to check your own school’s handbook though because policies change from school to school)

Also, if you or someone else feels safe doing so, a conversation about science probably couldn’t hurt. People can be prolife and still respect the science that exists on the matter.

You’re so sweet! I hope your first year is awesome!

(The sparkler is just how I feel :) )

DUDE THAT FIRST ONE IS THE WORST I’M DEALING WITH THAT RIGHT NOW.

Just be professional with them. Be polite and do the same things you would to a resident you don’t know well as you would to them. You don’t have to be their best friend or love everyone on hall. It’s not gonna happen, that’s not how life works. You’re still their RA and have to help if they need it. So be polite and do your best. :)

Making a few friends on staff goes a long way. People you can sit with during meetings or bitch about work with and know that you’re safe to talk to when shit happens. Most of my close friends are no longer on staff, so having people you can trust in your friend group outside of the staff is also important. You’re there to help each other. That’s why there’s staff instead of just one person per building (most of the time).

If you have time, movie nights or stupid games go a long way with making friends with other RAs. Or swapping stupid stories. That’s my favorite.