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#customer service – @kittennightfarts on Tumblr

Kitten Night Farts

@kittennightfarts / kittennightfarts.tumblr.com

http://www.emilytabet.co/
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cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

old people: let me speak to your manager. This never would have happened in my day. And yet you all want the minimum wage raised. I’m going to kill you.

cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

millennials: okay, my apologies. I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sorry I’m here.

me, walking into a store: are you guys busy? i can come back later. please don’t push yourselves on my account. things happen

Had a baby boomer in front of me at the Dairy Queen. She INSISTED she was a Blizzard EXPERT and there was simply NOT ENOUGH chocolate pieces in her blizzard and she wanted to complain to "whoever is in charge". She's going on and on with this teenager. The teenager is calmly explaining they make them all the same etc etc procedure etc etc. But this woman is now yelling at the teen.

So I walk past the woman and put money in teen's tip jar. Haven't even gotten ice cream yet.

Woman looks at me. Turns back and yells some more with the teen. I put more money in the tip jar.

The teen smiles at me. The woman can't think of what to say to me and stops yelling, because I'm looking at her dead in the eye like "atm is over there, I can go all night. The more you yell at her, the more money she makes."

Aggressive generosity to combat boomer selfishness is so punk

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cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

old people: let me speak to your manager. This never would have happened in my day. And yet you all want the minimum wage raised. I’m going to kill you.

cashier: I’m sorry it’s going to be a 5 minute wait for your food

millennials: okay, my apologies. I apologize for the inconvenience. I’m sorry I’m here.

me, walking into a store: are you guys busy? i can come back later. please don’t push yourselves on my account. things happen

Had a baby boomer in front of me at the Dairy Queen. She INSISTED she was a Blizzard EXPERT and there was simply NOT ENOUGH chocolate pieces in her blizzard and she wanted to complain to "whoever is in charge". She's going on and on with this teenager. The teenager is calmly explaining they make them all the same etc etc procedure etc etc. But this woman is now yelling at the teen.

So I walk past the woman and put money in teen's tip jar. Haven't even gotten ice cream yet.

Woman looks at me. Turns back and yells some more with the teen. I put more money in the tip jar.

The teen smiles at me. The woman can't think of what to say to me and stops yelling, because I'm looking at her dead in the eye like "atm is over there, I can go all night. The more you yell at her, the more money she makes."

Aggressive generosity to combat boomer selfishness is so punk

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mactiir
Getting up at 6 am IRL: aw fuck it’s so early oh my god
Getting up at 6 am in an rpg: *banging pots and pans together in front of the cobbler’s shop* WAKEY WAKEY THE SUN IS UP I WANT SOME SHOOOOOOOES

customers the same in all universes

this is it. this is the best response i’ve ever received on this post. everyone pack up, go home, we’re done here

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thesnadger

Since once in a blue moon I actually discover a decent rule for adulting, and since I know I have followers a few years younger than me who are just entering the workforce, I want to tell you about a very important phrase. 

“I won’t be available.”

Imagine you’re at work and your boss asks you to come in on Saturday. Saturday is usually your day off–coming in Saturdays is not an obligation to keep your job. Maybe you were going to watch a movie with a friend, or maybe you were just going to lie in bed and eat ice cream for eight hours, but either way you really, really don’t want to give up your day off.

If you consider yourself a millennial you’ve probably been raised to believe you need to justify not being constantly at work. And if you’re a gen-Z kid you’re likely getting the same toxic messages that we did. So in a situation like that, you might be inclined to do one of three things:

  1. Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Cave when they pressure you to come in anyway, since you’re not doing anything important.
  2. Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Over-apologize and worry that you looked bad/unprofessional.
  3. Lie and say you’ve got a doctor’s appointment or some other activity that feels like an adequate justification for not working.

The fact is, it doesn’t matter to your boss whether you’re having open heart surgery or watching anime in your underwear on Saturday. The only thing that affects them is the fact that you won’t be at work. So telling them why you won’t be at work only gives them reason to try and pressure you to come in anyway.

If you say “I won’t be available,” giving no further information, you’d be surprised how often that’s enough. Be polite and sympathetic in your tone, maybe even say “sorry, but I won’t be available.” But don’t make an excuse. If your boss is a professional individual, they’ll accept that as a ‘no’ and try to find someone else. 

But bosses aren’t always professional. Sometimes they’re whiny little tyrants. So, what if they pressure you further? The answer is–politely and sympathetically give them no further information.

“Are you sure you’re not available?” “Sorry, but yes.”

“Why won’t you be available?” “I have a prior commitment.” (Which you do, even if it’s only to yourself.)

“What’s your prior commitment?” “Sorry, but that’s kind of personal.”

“Can you reschedule it?” “I’m afraid not. Maybe someone else can come in?”

If you don’t give them anything to work with, they can’t pressure you into going beyond your obligations as an employee. And when they realize that, they’ll also realize they have to find someone else to come in and move on.

IMPORTANT!! PLEASE READ!!

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kagetsukai

Just like with many other parts of life, learn to say ‘no’ to people. You are important. Don’t kill yourself for another person, esp. if they are your boss.

This works for saying no in general as well. The less you justify or explain, the less the other person can argue with.

So. Much. This. I’ve worked with people who want me to defend the most personal or ridiculously insignificant things. Phrases to know and love:

- I won’t be available

- I prefer not to discuss that at work (or just “not to discuss that”)

If visibly injured (bandage, brace) - “Oh, it’s nothing! It looks worse than it is.”

If someone is prying or trying to push you around - “Thank you for your interest. I’m fine the way I am.”

Repeat as necessary with ZERO elaborating. You owe no explanations.

Avatar
Avatar
thesnadger

Since once in a blue moon I actually discover a decent rule for adulting, and since I know I have followers a few years younger than me who are just entering the workforce, I want to tell you about a very important phrase. 

“I won’t be available.”

Imagine you’re at work and your boss asks you to come in on Saturday. Saturday is usually your day off–coming in Saturdays is not an obligation to keep your job. Maybe you were going to watch a movie with a friend, or maybe you were just going to lie in bed and eat ice cream for eight hours, but either way you really, really don’t want to give up your day off.

If you consider yourself a millennial you’ve probably been raised to believe you need to justify not being constantly at work. And if you’re a gen-Z kid you’re likely getting the same toxic messages that we did. So in a situation like that, you might be inclined to do one of three things:

  1. Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Cave when they pressure you to come in anyway, since you’re not doing anything important.
  2. Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Over-apologize and worry that you looked bad/unprofessional.
  3. Lie and say you’ve got a doctor’s appointment or some other activity that feels like an adequate justification for not working.

The fact is, it doesn’t matter to your boss whether you’re having open heart surgery or watching anime in your underwear on Saturday. The only thing that affects them is the fact that you won’t be at work. So telling them why you won’t be at work only gives them reason to try and pressure you to come in anyway.

If you say “I won’t be available,” giving no further information, you’d be surprised how often that’s enough. Be polite and sympathetic in your tone, maybe even say “sorry, but I won’t be available.” But don’t make an excuse. If your boss is a professional individual, they’ll accept that as a ‘no’ and try to find someone else. 

But bosses aren’t always professional. Sometimes they’re whiny little tyrants. So, what if they pressure you further? The answer is–politely and sympathetically give them no further information.

“Are you sure you’re not available?” “Sorry, but yes.”

“Why won’t you be available?” “I have a prior commitment.” (Which you do, even if it’s only to yourself.)

“What’s your prior commitment?” “Sorry, but that’s kind of personal.”

“Can you reschedule it?” “I’m afraid not. Maybe someone else can come in?”

If you don’t give them anything to work with, they can’t pressure you into going beyond your obligations as an employee. And when they realize that, they’ll also realize they have to find someone else to come in and move on.

IMPORTANT!! PLEASE READ!!

Avatar
kagetsukai

Just like with many other parts of life, learn to say ‘no’ to people. You are important. Don’t kill yourself for another person, esp. if they are your boss.

This works for saying no in general as well. The less you justify or explain, the less the other person can argue with.

So. Much. This. I’ve worked with people who want me to defend the most personal or ridiculously insignificant things. Phrases to know and love:

- I won’t be available

- I prefer not to discuss that at work (or just “not to discuss that”)

If visibly injured (bandage, brace) - “Oh, it’s nothing! It looks worse than it is.”

If someone is prying or trying to push you around - “Thank you for your interest. I’m fine the way I am.”

Repeat as necessary with ZERO elaborating. You owe no explanations.

Avatar

I don’t want to live any longer in this world of “the customer is always right.” This is a world that shows the aggressive, the bull-headed, the cruel that they have full license to behave like beasts to get what they want. Half the time, they’re even rewarded for it; “here, ma'am, so sorry for the trouble, please accept this gift card–no charge.”

I want to live in a world that punishes these childish adults as you punish a toddler throwing a tantrum. No candy for you, Jimmy; you’re going home to bed if you can’t mind yourself in public.

Throw a hissy fit because your cashier isn’t moving as fast as you’d like? Find yourself gently escorted from the store until you can show some basic compassion and patience.

Hurl a pen across the table at your signing agent? You’ve just forfeited your right to refinance your mortgage this week. Try again when your temper is managed.

Scream obscenities at the Taco Bell rep because you know it’ll earn you a free soft shell? Here’s your money back; please feel free to play again when you’ve realized fast food is not worth more than the price of human dignity.

I am so sick of accepting–and, in truth, rewarding–these callous behavior patterns in customer service industries. The fact is, the customer is not always right. The customer is often just testing to see what he can get away with. Stop pandering to spoiled children, and show your employees they have more value than their red polo, or how much abuse they can withstand in a 40-hour week.

We are here to provide a service and to make a living.

We are not your punching bags.

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iopele

seems like the right time of year to bring this back around

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pleasefireme

Please fire me. I work at a video store and yesterday a man asked me if I could see if we had a movie in, only when I asked him what movie he wanted, he replied “That one with the bugs!”

I get dumb, vague descriptions like this quite a bit so I powered on and asked him which one and he was like, “You know, that one with the mitochondria’s!”

It took ten minutes (and a lot of yelling from the customer) to find out that he meant midichlorians.

Star Wars. It was freaking Star Wars.

THE MIDICHLORIAN IS THE POWERHOUSE OF THE FORCE.

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reblogged

I don’t want to live any longer in this world of “the customer is always right.” This is a world that shows the aggressive, the bull-headed, the cruel that they have full license to behave like beasts to get what they want. Half the time, they’re even rewarded for it; “here, ma'am, so sorry for the trouble, please accept this gift card–no charge.”

I want to live in a world that punishes these childish adults as you punish a toddler throwing a tantrum. No candy for you, Jimmy; you’re going home to bed if you can’t mind yourself in public.

Throw a hissy fit because your cashier isn’t moving as fast as you’d like? Find yourself gently escorted from the store until you can show some basic compassion and patience.

Hurl a pen across the table at your signing agent? You’ve just forfeited your right to refinance your mortgage this week. Try again when your temper is managed.

Scream obscenities at the Taco Bell rep because you know it’ll earn you a free soft shell? Here’s your money back; please feel free to play again when you’ve realized fast food is not worth more than the price of human dignity.

I am so sick of accepting–and, in truth, rewarding–these callous behavior patterns in customer service industries. The fact is, the customer is not always right. The customer is often just testing to see what he can get away with. Stop pandering to spoiled children, and show your employees they have more value than their red polo, or how much abuse they can withstand in a 40-hour week.

We are here to provide a service and to make a living.

We are not your punching bags.

Avatar
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gray-jane

the other day at work, i asked a woman her name– like i do for everyone, because we have to write it on the cup–and she goes “we come in here all the time. you should really know our names by now” as if i don’t serve hundreds of people a day or as though a nondescript middle aged white woman made such an impact upon me that i’d remember her. i was feeling pretty impatient and irritable though, so i covered my name tag with my hand and asked her my name and she didn’t know it and at least had the decency to change demeanor from haughty and superior to sort of quietly embarrassed and i’m fairly sure that’s the only thing i’ve ever done at work that matters to me. 

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Working at the check out

*Some old dude packing up his shopping*
Me: Have a nice evening
Guy: Don't say that
Me: Sorry?
Guy: Have a nice evening. What does that even mean? If I've just had a divorce am I going to have a nice evening? If my mother just died am I going to have a nice evening? Just say good evening. It's formal and to the point.
Me:...
Me: good evening then.
*Later is a group of 21 year olds, all buying alcohol*
Me: [getting flustered as the line at my checkout is super long] can I see ID?
First dude: of course! Pass them down boys we can make this easier for her. Calm down, you're doing great.
Do people genuinely still think young people are the worst customers?
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