When you’ve been cooking for long enough, you stop making recipes and start making “shit in a skillet” and “whatever soup”
The truth is, cooking is just a basic skill set, and once you have that skill set down you can make almost anything. It's like drawing/painting, once you learn what you're doing, you can do anything.
Do Not Apply This Thinking To Baking.
sewing is one of those skills everyone with the ability should know IMO. i’ve known too many people who just throw out perfectly servicable clothing and bedding because of tears or buttons that have fallen off and these can be fixed at home. sewing’s not hard either.
sewing, like baking bread, is one of those basic skills that corporations have convinced people is just impossible or too expensive for the average person to do in order to manipulate people into buying things.
i’m not saying sewing is possible for everyone, but if you have motor skills fine enough to, say, replace lead in a mechanical pencil, you can learn to sew, and you can help people who can’t sew. here’s a good guide with gifs.
this is what we mean when we say civilization de-skills us to make us dependent
How do Chinese cooks cut vegetables
At first I was like, oh neat some fun tricks to make chopping faster and less messy, and then he made an extendable potato and I died
Witchcraft
aww i love this guy making hand hearts at the camera i’m so proud of him
On the subject of Completely Fucking Hating Cooking, I just have to say that this is such a good book for people who Completely Fucking Hate Cooking. This author understands the reasons people hate cooking, and understands that you still have to eat things, and understands the concept of ‘easy quick meals’ that are actually easy quick meals.
Like…it’s such a good book. It Understands.
Terry Pratchett - The Last Continent (via terrypratchettparadise)
Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them?? fat is like the grossest part of meat
“Why hello there, little children~. Please follow me to my magical… FITNESS ROOM. NO P A N S I E S ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT. LEAVE YOUR WHINING AT THE DOOR BECAUSE IT’S LEG DAY AND WE’RE ABOUT TO GET R-R-R-RIPPE D.”
Because they’re always cooking said kids in cauldrons and ovens - aka long cooking times at lowish heat. If you do that to fatty meat, the fat melts completely and the meat gets tear-it-apart-with-a-fork soft. If you do it to lean meat, you get tiny little sad meat bits that bring no joy to anyone.
well you did ask
Also there’s wisdom in fattening them up on sweets and other carbs. A meatless, carb-rich diet makes for more tender and flavourful meat.
you are arguing over the semantics of EATING CHILDREN
Well yeah, you gotta get this shit right or it’s a waste of 40-80 lbs of meat.
plus if you feed them a high fat, low nutrition diet, they’re easier to subdue and less likely to run away, which would be a concern for an elderly crone.
Thank you, Old Witch With Candy House side of tumblr.
i love this lol
This is so calming
My ass would of cut off my whole arm
This makes me so happy
And if you can’t find a dad
a lesbian will work just as well
I didn’t think it could get better but it got better
Cooking: Murder training??? That Hannibal guy might be on to something.
Yessss.
this guy is fucking hilarious <3
