Les Miséroïdes - Les Inconnus
Translation :
Narrator : Jean-Claude Van Damme, finally playing… Jean Valjean
Thénardier : what will it be ?
Valjean : Cosette.
Thénardier : sorry, but we don’t have this here anymore.
Valjean : I don’t have any time to lose, Thénardier
Valjean : Cosette *hits Thénardier*
Narrator : Les Miséroïdes, adapted from the book from Victor Hugo. THX sound, quadriphonic-digital-laser dolby-system. Something never heard.
Valjean : *growls*
Valjean : Javert !
Javert : Valjean. You’re a dead man.
Valjean : Javert ! Let go of Cosette and Gavroche !
Javert : you want me to release the kid ? Okay.
Gavroche : I fell on the ground, it’s Voltaire’s fault… (this has been translated into “ And little people know /When little people fight” in the song Little People)
Valjean : no. It’s my fault.
Javert : want me to release the girl too ?
*flashback*
Old master : never let hate cloud the first reason in your heart.
*end of flashback*
Javert : Valjean. You’re gay.
*yelling and fighting ensue*
Narrator : according to the faithful adaptation of the novel written by Victor Hugo.
Javert : Valjean ! You’re gay !
Les Miséroïdes. Palme d’Or at the Cannes festival.
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS
