Killian Whump

*WEEOOWEEOO* FANDOM POLICE *WEEOOWEEOO*

This Just In: Plagiarism sucks. Don’t do it.

This Also Just In: Bullying sucks. Don’t do it.

In Semi-Related News: All requests for free passes to do the second because someone did the first have been DENIED. You are all in violation of Fandom Code #5213 and should cease and desist immediately.

Also: We’re out of cookies in the Fandom Police Station.

TL;DR: Everybody try sucking a little less, please. Thank you.

*WEEOOWEEOO* FANDOM POLICE *WEEOOWEEOO*

fuck everyone else, i respect YOU, fellow fandom grandma

YOU... I like you! You can ride in the police car with me :D

I’ll even let you play with the siren :D Wait, do you have cookies?

You’ve seen @bleebug‘s No-Nose Colin. Now get ready for…

he’s trying not to laugh at a Biggus Dickus joke, cut him some slack

(LOL XD) But what’s so funny about Biggus Dickus?!?!

yall ever wanna see an almost hilariously terrible horror movie with wee jonas armstrong giving full frontal, just turn on “book of blood”

….okay, fine, it’s a full profile. but there is dick. not unimpressive dick, i might add

of course immediately afterwards, the character’s professor has a sex dream about him

and then he gets the crap beat out of him by ghosts (and cries)

….honestly, @killian-whump , get your ass over here and enjoy this with me, even if it’s not colin it’s the closest thing you get aside from cloning him

*looks up Jonas Armstrong*

Okay. I mean, I could look at his dick. For science.

*looks up this movie*

Wait, what the fuck.

Why is this lady holding some guy’s entire fucking skin without a body inside it and looking at it like she’s in a detergent commercial and about to say, “I can’t believe the stain’s gone!”??

I’m... I’m not sure I want to see this XD

But I’m here, you know, for moral support and shitposting!

OH NO SPN S13 JUST DROPPED ON NETFLIX

….fuck, i hate how much i still love this dumpster fire of a show lmao

and here i was digitizing my handwritten draft of a fic for @killian-whump in the event that i lose my bet over colin’s shoes. so much for that

LOL! :D

THIS IS A SERVICE I WILL GLADLY PROVIDE!!! :D

You can submit them via my submission box with your name or anonymously (but please drop me a chat message so I know who the anon submission’s from, haha) or if you’d rather send me a link or even an e-mail, just drop me a message and lemme know :D

this just in, if you’re into David whump, please keep an eye on “His Princess” because the next couple of chapters in Storeybrooke are hands-down the meanest thing i’ve ever written

…. with the exception of the Admiral Emma story, in which i whoop Killian’s ass basically every chapter he’s in. i’m gonna tag @killian-whump every time i post an update lmao

(and my CSBB story is basically one big Emma whump, so. i guess i’m covering all the Captain Charming Swan whump bases. YEET)

Please do!!!

...and I mean that for the tagging and, of course, for the whumping XD

you know that moment when cs is making out on the couch  with the intention of making pancakes before it was called that and emma grabs killian’s booty but before doing so she raises her arm then pauses mid-air for just a tiny second? I firmly believed she was going for a spank

@killian-whump thoughts? 🤔

I will never NOT support this idea.

@killian-whump have u seen this hhhhh

Ooooh... No, I hadn’t seen this before! Oooh, so many things to appreciate about this right here... Yum, yum! Thank you for bringing it to my attention!!!

Behind the Scenes Promo Stills from episode 2x04 “The Crocodile” (x)

The promos for this episode mostly focused on our first glimpse of Colin as Captain Hook in the tavern with Milah, but there were also some BTS shots released from the altercation between Rumple and Hook on the docks.

okay but

where are the shots of bobby cackling as colin helplessly walked into walls because he’d never worked with greenscreen

(poor child)

INDEED. Where is this quality content that we need???