He doesn’t know that I care.

The Valley of Tomorrow

Deleted Scenes Week Six: Underworld

In honor of Once coming to its conclusion, I will be posting my deleted scene fics here on tumblr leading up to the finale. There are 14 total, and they will be posted in chronological order. Each week leading up to the finale, I will post the scenes in a particular arc.

Summary: But the one thing that cuts deepest of all is the mirror that hangs on the other side of the chamber. This is Killian Jones true torture. Or how Killian went from a hero’s death to being tortured by Hades. Title and lyrics from song of the same name by needtobreathe.

Words: Almost 2,000

Rating: T

Episode: Swan Song through Labor of Love (contains dialogue from Labor of Love)

Trigger Warnings: Major Killian whump

I am a troubled mind, I am a calloused heart

A failing engine from driving way too hard

Trying way too hard

I pulled a thirty eight out of my bleeding heart

I killed my selfishness for bringing me this far

This far away from you

Oh, this is the way I wanna go down

This is the way I wanna go out

Killian Jones, sadly, has lied to Emma Swan before. Many times. It’s a fact that he wishes weren’t true. A fact that merely points to the depth of blackness in his soul. But this lie has to be the worst one he’s ever told her.

He lies and tells her it’s okay, nodding at her as she sobs, Excalibur clutched in her fist. The tears streaming down her face break his heart in two, and he wishes she didn’t have to do this. He thought about doing it himself, of holding the sword to his breast and falling upon it. But he feels the darkness throbbing just below the surface, and he knows he isn’t strong enough. It has to be her. So he lies.

He lies and lets her believe it won’t hurt him, that he isn’t afraid of steel slicing right through him. Lies as if he doesn’t mind dying. Not that he doesn’t know this is the right thing to do. But he wanted so much more. His heart breaks to think of all they wanted together and now will never have. Tries not to think of all the memories they will never make in that house he picked out for them.

He told her this day would come, that afternoon in that cabin in the woods. He warned her someday he would lose his happy ending. But now he lies as if he won’t miss it at all.

Keep reading

“Killian. Killian. We’re here to help you.”

365 days of captain swan: day 167 ❥

Transparent Captain Hook

...for all your transparent whumpy!Hook image editing and meme needs!

As per @fandomtransparents‘ rules, make sure to credit them if used.

(And thank you, @mryddinwilt for bringing this to my attention!)

Happy 3 more days! Have bit of angst, because you know, we aren’t going to get enough of it lol.

Please no reposting :)

But he’s suffering in the underworld, he’s suffering really badly.  - Colin O’Donoghue

365 days of captain swan (day 254)

“He doesn’t know we came for him. He doesn’t know we’re here. He doesn’t know that I care.”

“Yes, he does.”

CS Hiatus Rewatch (17 days): 5x12 - “Souls of the Departed”

Killian Jones Promotional Stills // 5.12 - Souls of the Departed // 76/??