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#nightmare time – @katsumatsu4 on Tumblr
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Oh, d'arvit

@katsumatsu4 / katsumatsu4.tumblr.com

fics/artblog: kukurykunapatyku i eat, i sleep, i enjoy things
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Ted deaths ranked by how pathetic they are

6) Black Friday (nuked by Russia, presumably)

Not pathetic at all! Died tragically and surrounded by the people he cares about, all of them praying together for a chance to keep going. Very poetic. 0/10 not pathetic.

5) Time Bastard (imprisoned for eternity)

lmao this is the best ending of all if you ask me, all the others are too quick and to the point, now he can finally have a taste of hell. Not very pathetic though, more like a bit overkill. 3/10

4) Time Bastard (stabbed)

ngl stabbed by Paul and Emma is how I want to go. Kinda pathetic and sad but like, inspiration. 4/10

3) The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals (shot)

Dude are you kidding me?! You abandoned your best friend AFTER your whole lil speech about how much you’d changed and how you love him? Lol you DESERVED that bullet, go fuck yourself08/10

2) The Hatchetfield Ape-Man (shot)

That one was so fucking pathetic. The lengths this guy went to get laid and all that for what? die naked and alone without having even fucked her after pretending for like, weeks? 10/10, unaltered Ted experience at its peak

1) Daddy (shot 4 times)

Complete buffoonery. Useless af, didn’t even get to eat out Sheila or get a chance. My god, that was so pathetic lmao. Just a completely worthless man dying a sad pitiful quick death, shot in the dick. Justice is served. 1,000,000/10 oh my god I still can’t believe it, best scene ever!

I said what I said. Boy was out to eat some pussy that night and instead got shot in the dick :/

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In Perky's Buds, it would have been so good if instead of it being Grace Chastity that Emma meets as she's running away from the farm it was Paul. Because that part in tgwdlm where Paul runs into the coffee shop and is obviously distraught about all the singing and Emma is unnerved by him, but it would have been the reverse situation here with Emma begging Paul for help and him being scared and wary of her

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