The Stars.

"You're 17, what are you going to do with your life?" I'm gonna write poetry in my room, try to get published, kill myself with arsenic, and be worshipped like some kind of Romantic Messiah a hundred years later when a bunch of high and alcoholic teenagers start a cult around me.

Hey Anonie. No problem lol. Now, I haven't read all those I'm about to list, but I know people (and have read people) that have and like them greatly so: (in no particular order)

@maryoliverdotcom @memory-the-unconscious do yall have any suggestions??

Being a teenage writer is like: I can either invent a literary genre or kill myself with arsenic.

Normal people reading poetry: Oh my goodness! I just love it so much it makes me feel so many things!!!!

Me reading poetry: Wtf are you talking about!? How is the syllable fucking stressed!? I'M STRESSED! UNSTRESS ME!!!!

Everyone upset about Charlotte Bronte being racist but nobody wants to talk about that chapter where Jane goes to her abusers home and apologizes for yelling at her that 1 time. After 9 (8??) years of abuse. Like... can I see this critical discourse please. Because it's not the "racism!!1!" in this book that bothers me, (also no, it's not Mr. Rochester. I am a Rochester stan, tyvm) it's the psuedo-Christian Victorian morality that icks me. I had to put the book down and I wouldn't stop screaming for a good half hour

Oh my god someone described Mr. Rivers (I hate this bitch. Idc what Jane said. He’s burning in hell 😊) as a devoted missionary and I’m just like….. it’s 2023… and not everyone has read that book so you realllllllly need to be clear about what that means 😭 😂

I love that Mr Rochester is like “That french slut cheated on me!” While he’s got his wife with multiple women. Just gotta love those double standard’s 🙄.

However, i would like to point out (because some people forget this) neither Charlotte Brontë nor Jane Eyre condones this behavior. This isn’t “Oh if this was a woman they’d freak” i mean… it is but not exactly. Jane is quite open in her disgust for his lifestyle and (more importantly) HE HIMSELF IS DISGUSTED BY IT and wears to NEVER RETURN to it. So i love Edward.

Also while I’m on this topic I’d like to bring up the quote

And I bring thisnup because so many people attribute it to Jane saying “oh she refuses to be his mistress” and no bruh SHE didn’t have to refuse to BE one because HE refused to MAKE her one. Yall just want any excuse to hate on Rochester and it shows through your blatant misunderstanding of this book.

Also because im on a roll at this point: putting Bertha in the attic was more humane then sending her to an asylum. AND Edward lost his eyes trying to save this woman, who burned down his house and is the reason he can’t marry Jane. And yet he only ever SPEAKS of her harshly. All his ACTIONS are actually incredibly cordial.

Okay. Now I’m done. Thank you for attending my TedTalk.

I love that Jane was just freaking badass from the age of 10. So creep tells her she’s going to hell when she dies (something even my super religious and conservative grandmother said is bad theology) and asks her how she hopes to avoid it to which Jane responds “By keeping in good health and not dying.” 😎 👑

Few things will ever be as funny to me as Mr Rochester going, “I know my Maker sanctions what I do” and then (no joke) TWO SENTENCES later Jane is all like “Where in the world did that wind come from?” GOD JANE! IT CAME FROM GOD! CAUSE THIS LIL RAKE (no hate to edward i love him 😂) HAS HIS WIFE IN HIS ATTIC! God was immediately like: The heck is wring with you simps!