But when a saga popular with pre-adolescent girls peaks romantically on a night that leaves the heroine to wake up covered with bruises in the shape of her husband’s hands — and when that heroine then spends the morning explaining to her husband that she’s incredibly happy even though he injured her, and that it’s not his fault because she understands he couldn’t help it in light of the depth of his passion — that’s profoundly irresponsible.
I put this quote up on my Facebook while a bit ago, and it’s actually generated quite the debate among folks there.
Here’s my take (if you don’t feel like hearing my ramblings, feel free to move along to the animated gif above this post or the latest pro/con OWS post below on your dash. I don’t mind):
It concerns me greatly that moms all over the world will be taking their pre-tween, tween, and teen daughters to the cinema to see this film. We live in a culture where one in four women have been the victim of some form of domestic abuse, whether it be from a spouse, boyfriend, or other family member. And those are the ones that we actually know about, where they’ve actually either been reported to authorities or provided by womens’ shelters that protect victims and their families.
A very common message these women hear from their abuser is the line: “I’m so sorry. I really didn’t mean it. It won’t happen again, I promise.” And they hear this over and over and over and over again.
Ok, admittedly, I am hyper-sensitive to this issue because I’m the father of two beautiful young girls. I know as they get older that they are going to be bombarded with messages like:
- You’re too fat.
- Wear these clothes, buy this jewelry, use this makeup, or you will not find a man.
- You can only find your worth when you’re in a relationship.
- If a man rapes or sexually assaults you, it was your fault because you were wearing the things we told you to wear in the first place.
- If a man hits you, he didn’t really mean to and promises he’ll never do it again. Just give him another chance. He can change. Promise. You can change him.
Twilight has been specifically targeted, marketed, and packaged in a pretty little blood-stained bow towards young women. Sadly, it’s also been heavily embraced by many of these young women’s mothers as well, who read these books and see these movies right alongside their girls, seemingly placing their stamp of approval on the content within. It’s heartbreaking.
This post isn’t to try and convince people how to parent. Hell, I’m still learning, and most days feel like I have no idea what I am doing. Consider this more of a plea. An appeal, rather. I look at my role as Arwen and Greer’s father as the single most important thing I will do in this life. How I treat them, what I say, and how I treat my wife, their mother, not only in front of them, but behind closed doors, will be the things that will stick with them throughout their entire life. I need to be a model of what love and respect really looks, sounds and feels like. Stacie and I have a huge responsibility to them to model what that looks like, and teach them that their worth doesn’t come from clothes, money, looks, a romantic relationship or lack thereof. And we need to be making sure that when they are exposed to messages, images, whatever, that is contrary to those things, that we remind them of how beautiful, precious, special, and amazing they are.
I could go on and on. But I’ll end here. Twilight sucks. Only take your kids if you want to show them what NOT to do.
Reporting from Helm’s Deep with Hugs and Unicorns,
I agree. The Twilight Saga does not offer positive themes; in fact, it offers detrimental themes. It teaches girls to be weak and dependent instead of strong and independent. It’s depressing how many girls really revel in the horrible story-line of an abusive relationship. Please think about Twilight and you’ll realize how fucked up it is. Whether or not you find it entertaining, I ask you to evaluate its worth. Evaluate what it teaches the youth. It’s not a positive influence. Boycott Twilight.
helms-deep’s commentary was 100% spot on.
There was also the fact that Breaking Dawn shoved a pro-life message into the mix. The fetus was killing Bella, but she refused to have an abortion (her choice, but seriously, the message is there for impressionable girls, the life of a fetus is worth more than the mother’s). Anytime the fetus was called anything but a baby, the speaker was usually corrected immediately.
Breaking Dawn, and the Twilight series in total, is a lesson in how to subjugate women and keep them as nothing more than pretty princesses that need men to help them.
