this is not a duet

VSPINK goes feminist

!!!!!!

wooOOOOOOOOOOOOrrrrk 

and a plus-size babe of color on the front page i can’t deal 

This is AMAZING

LOOK AT THESE MODELS! This is amazing!! And it’s Victoria’s Secret!

WHY DO I NOT OWN ALL OF THESE PANTIES BECAUSE WOW VS YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING INCREDIBLY RIGHT

OH MY GOD AND LOOK AT THIS: If only this were real. Someone (whose name shall be withheld) responded to my post with less than kind words: "I’m sorry, but if you thought this was real I literally have no hope for you in life at all whatsoever. You lose extra..." I couldn't see the rest because they'd deleted their post before I could respond.

Okay, so it's not real and you "literally" have no hope for me in life. What happens now? VS will get an influx of letters of how happy customers/potential customers are to see this kind of thing going on. Should they respond to the hoax, what are they gonna say? "Yeah, we don't believe in this 'treating women equally' stuff so we're gonna continue being sexist bastards." No. It might force them to reevaluate the kind of stuff they're putting out there and the kind of image they're portraying. I don't expect a whole lot of progress considering the subject matter but someone sure rang the bell and there's a lot of momentum going.

Consent is sexy.

sex is not a compliment you give to someone.

you don’t owe sex to anyone, ever.

avoiding asshats will make your sex life better.

#trufax

TW: rape, sexual assault

Have you ever woken up in a place you did not know, next to a person you couldn’t remember going to bed with? Have you ever only remembered snippets of an evening out or not remembered anything at all? Inspired by events in our own personal lives, we wanted to make a video about being under the influence and engaging in sexual activity.

So, what happens after you blackout from a night of being under the influence? What do you do in that moment where your memory escapes you and you are left wondering what, where and who you’re body has been in contact with? 

First, consider if there was consent. 

Yes there was? Then as soon possible: 

Get tested! 

To find your local clinic, click here. (US)

If applicable - use emergency contraception! 

For everything you need to know about EC, click here, and if you’re already on the pill, see this list of birth control pills that can also be used as EC. 

If you feel safe and comfortable, communicate with your partner(s) about what occurred. 

If not, that is perfectly alright, take that energy and focus it on making sure you’re okay. 

No, there wasn’t consent? 

It’s not your fault. Your feelings are valid. Your experience is real. There are people who can help you through this confusing and emotionally distressing time. 

Information on reporting rape

Seek medical attention

RAINN: This website has a free, confidential hotline and online chat available with professionals standing by that can help you understand what to do next.

If you’re a college student, contact your schools counselor service or find a local counseling center near you.

Other important resources that might be helpful: 

For friends and family of someone who has been sexually assaulted/raped

International Resources for non-consenting sexual activity

Planned Parenthood: Here you will find information on STD Testing, Emergency contraception and they even have a live chat available if you want to speak with someone confidentially.

The effects of any undesirable sexual experience can effect someone far deeper than the physical. Click the link to learn more. 

Some research on the relationship between drinking and having sex.

Information on date-rape drugs and how to protect yourself from date rape

This is an ongoing dialogue. What are your thoughts on our list? How can we make it stronger? How can sex educators discuss sex and being under the influence in a comprehensive, relatable and inclusive way? Do you have anything you would like to add, share or contribute? Let us know in our ask box or submit your story here. 

- Laura and Lisandra

oo1. boobs are really, really awesome. like seriously. they’re the most universally appealing body part, and no one’s going to fault you for liking them. i totally get that you’re turned on by them! but let’s get something straight. awesome boobs are not an invitation.

sometimes it’s hot out and i don’t feel like having extra clothing on just so you won’t check me out. or sometimes, maybe i am in the mood to show off! but even then, my boobs aren’t an automatic “yes.” no matter how slutty you think i look, no matter how turned on you might be, an awesome rack is not a substitute for consent.

oo2. like most people around the world, i enjoy having fun! and sometimes, that fun might involve drinking, or the use of other mind-altering substances. rules are a little different when you’re drunk. you can act sillier and tell stupid jokes and maybe even get away with dancing on the table!

but you know what you can’t get away with? not establishing consent! no matter how drunk you are, i am, or we all are, boundaries still exist. you still have to make sure that your potential bedmate is cool with bumping uglies, no matter if you’ve been together three years or known each other’s names for three minutes. and use whatever judgment you have left: if they’re too far under the influence to drive home, they’re probably too far under the influence to give true consent.

oo3. society seems to really have a thing about people who are on the larger side. there’s so much body shaming in today’s world, and a lot of it is just totally accepted. you may think that since i am fat, i’m desperate for any vague sign of affection, so i’ll be okay with you doing whatever you want to me. i really hate to disappoint, but if you think that i’m a loser who should feel lucky to be touched, you’re going to have a bad time.

no one is lucky to get raped. no one is lucky to face unwanted sexual advances. no one is lucky to be harassed. the rules don’t change when someone’s above a size twelve.

oo4. it’s pretty obvious that most people in the world enjoy sex, otherwise we wouldn’t be here. i for one am totally into sex! if i could have sex all day, i totally would. you know how there’s that stupid rumor that men think about sex every seven seconds? well it’s not stupid, because i totally think about sex that often. 

however, that doesn’t mean that i’m down to fuck anyone any time. you may have heard that i’ll sleep with anyone. maybe i slept with your friend. hell, maybe we even slept together once! but no matter what, you’ve still got to get that “yes.” i enjoy sex with respectful partners who understand boundaries. i don’t enjoy being degraded, pressured, or having assumptions made about me. most people don’t, so why press your luck?

oo5. and speaking of assumptions… sexuality is hugely complex. you wouldn’t want your preferences to be generalized, so don’t do it to anyone else! i’ve slept with girls; that does not mean i will sleep with all girls. i’ve been tied up; that does not mean you can tie me up. i’ve had threesomes; that does not mean that i will have a threesome with you and your buddy.

oo6. you are not owed sex. there, i said it. no matter what you do for me, there is no situation i can think of where i owe you sex. if you take me out for dinner, or help me move in to a new apartment, or proofread my angry letter to urban outfitters, i’ll be really grateful! i might make bake you something, or buy you a twelve-pack of steel reserve. and if we’re already close, it might make me fall incredibly in love with you and we could end up fucking on the living room floor, don’t get me wrong!

i just won’t owe that to you. when you do something nice for someone, you’re doing it out of the goodness of your own heart. if you’re doing it expecting something in return, you’re not doing something nice. you’re trying to perform an underhanded deal. if you want to arrange for me to owe you sex, let me know outright, so i can know that you’re not a decent person at all, just a scummy scum scum who gets off on forcing people into uncomfortable situations. 

oo7. and here’s the big one. you’ve probably heard “no means no” a million times, and we all like to think we’re the kind of person who, if our partner said no, we’d stop right away. but consent is more than not being told no. it’s being told yes. enthusiastically. 

if your partner isn’t saying no, but also isn’t saying yes, take a step back and examine the situation. this boils down to being a moral human being. sure, if your partner doesn’t say no, it might be more difficult for you to get convicted of rape. but are you the kind of person that thinks it’s okay to take advantage of someone on a technicality? please don’t be.

it’s up to you to make sure that your partner feels comfortable, safe, and okay, and it’s up to you to take a step back if they don’t. be the responsible person, because the only person who can prevent rape is YOU. 

holy shit, this is the bestest