me @ my skin : get ur shit together

My skin @ me: you first

me: *embarrasses self in public* me: *loudly* i sure hope no one MURDERS me tonight in my sleep WHERE I LIVE at 125 west (that’s W-E-S-T) roa…

Damn I hate Tumblr updates like everytime I log in they’ve fucked up the most random shit and before you know it Everything Has Changed (Taylor Swift™ No copyright infringement intended. Property of TAS LLC Management 2012©).

lms

let me suffer

reblog if you love the moon, or any other really big rock

Does this include Dwayne

Of course it does

me: *has small inconvenience* me: i guess the only solution is To Die

boy: Its like we finish each others sentences

girl: .

hello, is this mcdonalds? ah yes, i would like to make reservations for 2

some kid: just drop your trash on the floor it’ll be picked up that’s what the cleaners are paid for

me: my mama said we can’t be friends anymore effective right now immediately 

why did everyone play the recorder in fourth grade what were they training us for

person: magic isnt real

me:  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )つ──☆

*gets abducted by aliens* thank you. you have no idea how much i hated living on that planet

Pressing door close in an elevator as a white person is heading towards it because they have enough doors open for them in this white supremacist hell society

Oh my god

what does html stand for?

hypertext markup language

no i mean like, what does it believe in?

me: *goes to nasa* hello i would like to volunteer to be thrown into the sun nasa: u would die me: i beg u

I tried rickrolling my friend but she had the YouTube video URL memorized