autism problem #1322

When you try to avoid people so you’re seen as rude or mean but really you’re just overwhelmed by said people

Wanting not to be touched doesn’t make you a mean person. Wanting people to respect your personal boundaries doesn’t make you annoying. You shouldn’t have to put yourself through things that hurt or upset you just because other people think they are harmless.

It’s funny (and, by “funny”, i mean “sad”) how NTs can actually hate us without actively recognizing it. They just… hate our autistic traits. But they don’t say it like that.

They’re saying “I can’t work with you because you’re too focused on your stuff and you don’t communicate well”.

They’re saying “I can’t handle you because you don’t understand what I’m saying to you and you’re too much in your little world”.

They’re talking about autistic coded characters and they’re dismissing them quickly, saying stuff like “He’s obnoxious, he’s eccentric, no one behaves like him IRL, he ruins the show” or “I can’t watch this tv show because this character is craaaazy and i hate the way he’s behaving” (for the first sentence, they were talking about Dirk Gently, and, for the second sentence, about Sherlock from the BBC tv show).

They’re praising you as soon as you’re wearing your “Neurotypical” mask and they complain when you’re too tired to put it on. They’re trying to make eye contact and to touch you, no matter how much you tell or show that it makes you uncomfortable.

I wonder if their reaction might change if I told them that I’m autistic. They would probably give me a pity look. I don’t think they would realize that, with or without the label, i’m still the same person and i’m still the woman they hate so much for being who she is : autistic.