Disability Etiquette - Some Do’s and Do not’s!
Hey all! It’s your local disabled Mod Ife! Since it is disability pride month, here is some simple etiquette to keep in mind in your daily interactions with disabled people!
The Do’s
Do use the word disabled! Disabled is not a bad word! Differently abled or physically challenged often come across as condescending and it is better to just use the word disabled.
Do try and increase accessibility! A simple way of doing this right now can be adding captions to your posts, or breaking up large blocks of text into smaller paragraphs.
Do listen to disabled people! If there’s an issue involving disability rights, listen to our voices! There are many of us willing to discuss these issues in depth! (Also understand that every disabled person you meet or admire does not have to give you their in depth opinion on every issue!)
Do talk to or ask questions to the disabled person, not their companions! In most circumstances this is what the person with a disability will prefer, as you talking about them while they are right there is often hurtful (especially if it is coming from a medical professional).
Do try and see how an individual with a disability refers to themselves. (in example “a person with autism” (person-first language) vs “an autistic person” (identity-first language))
There is no real hard and fast rule for this so if you’re meeting someone who is disabled and want to know which they would prefer, if they have a preference, listen to how they refer to themselves!
The Do Not’s
Do not assume that a person who is disabled needs your assistance. While it can be kind to ask if they need help, you shouldn’t just jump in without asking first!
(For example if you see someone struggling to get their wheelchair up a ramp, please ask before just pushing them up!)
(Not only can it be scary and rude to be suddenly grabbed by someone and have no control over your movement, but you never know if that person feels they need to make it up that ramp themselves.)
Do not assume that because you can’t see or determine a person’s disability that they aren’t disabled. There are so many people in this world with invisible disabilities and they don’t need to hear from you that you think they’re faking it.
Do not assume that because a mobility aid isn’t needed constantly and at all times that the person is faking their disability. There are many people with disabilities who need a mobility aid only part of the time!
Do not ask disabled people personal questions about their illness, disability, etc. - particularly in public - and particularly if you don’t know them. Most disabled people are not willing to give you their medical and or mental health history just to satisfy your curiosity.
If you really really need to know, AND you know this particular disabled person, you can ask if it would be ok to ask them questions about their disability.
Do not assume that life with a disability is miserable, or not worth living. People with disabilities can and do lead happy lives!
Do not assume that people with disabilities just need to “try harder” to be “normal”. Disabled people are often already trying their hardest, and to be told that it isn’t enough hurts.
-Mod Ife