# 1 from the # series

“1” from the # series

deep waters

know

all that my , psyche

is

not yet ready

to receive at this time.

often the wind pulls me

forth to face what others try to erase,

leaving behind

not a trace of accountability.

Silly me,

seems as

though I eat my words , sometimes.

... But,

if measured by my temper than

that leaves room for

a complex misunderstanding

of the humble spirit I hold.

my biggest dream in life

is the blessing of

growing old.

✨✨✨✨✨

“23” from the # series April28,2019

weary I’ve grown of the overall moans & groans of life , I find myself pondering the whole point of it all too often, mind always poppin off with another wonder always finding myself in a deep slumber you can’t really run from the unknown, it makes itself known it hovers over your bones like when the sunset kisses the tide. The demise of it all something I may never live to see they all say to let it be but if I did then what would I become? another empty soul who doesn’t move to the sound of a drum? that doesn’t sound like any fun so it seems I’ve already won.

# 3 from the # series May9,2019

sometimes i get tired of being tired of seeing, but I don’t have a way of fleeing that would not leave others seething at my absence

philosophical thoughts

this feeling over me is just one of tiredness. like, i’m so aware of the metaphysical aspects of life i’ve grown to hate this realm of life and it’s like my craving to die increased. im tired of this world. i’m not suicidal nor do i fear death ... it’s just my philosopher mind constantly at work and never resting. i don’t know how to make it go away sadly and that’s what be killing me because i wish i could be a regular 23 year old. but this is my gift ... in just tired of exsisting here. life is controlled my money and greed, i have to spend all of my days in a constant state of work, worrying is the future and it’s like... why? because of colonization...?! like i really wonder what life was like spiritually mentally emotionally when you did not have to live this way. i wish i could get away from here but it’s not possible... if i left and lived in a forest away from anyone in a weird way i would miss this life, bc im so conditioned to it... or would i? i don’t know.. the more aware i become the bigger the disconnect grows between me and everyone else in my life. the tired i feel just can’t be relived. i hate when people act like because you’re young you can’t be tired or fed up. like bitch im literally living through an era of next level evil, you can suck my entire dick. —————— i’ve never had love never had no intimacy physical contact low in occurances and sometimes i wonder would that make me feel any different ? is that the key factor to why i can’t stand existing? who knows

Does anyone know where I could find information on different types of butterflies and what they represent spiritually? I’ve googled and came up short. I want to make sure I get the right one tattooed. I also remember when my Yoga teacher who is native told me how an elder explained to her once how butterflies are like healers, he noticed she had one and was like I see you have a butterfly healer. I thought that was cool asf considering I wanted one for some time. I just have to make sure it’s the proper one, and not just for aesthetics.... or.. should I get what is beautiful to me THEN research it..... hmmmmm decisions

Studying Arts & Humanities made me look at the world through such an artistic lens #classof2018 📸 @hunt_the_bay 💇🏽‍♀️ @stylezbytaj 💄 @millymademe // 🇮🇹 #SicilianPrincess / / / / / / / / / / #bayareamodels #modelsearch #bayareamodel #oaklandmodels #bayareaphotography #sfmodels #blackgirlmagic #fashionista #philosophy #philosopher #blackphilosophy #blackphilosophers #writerscommunity #stylezbytaj #writersofinstagram #blackwriters #blackwriter #writercommunity #blackpoet #blackpoets #poetsofinstagram #poetsofig #socialscience #socialsciences #humanities #artsandhumanities #humanitiesmajor #socialsciencemajor (at Oakland, California)