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Danger noodle of Eden

@ineffablerainstorm

30s, queer af, any pronouns
Good Omens hyperfixation At least 80% Crowley at all times Apparantly stuff about leaning on things and not sitting straight Every snek Crowley deserves a boop 🕶️🐍
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I get that the bookshop fire was traumatic for Crowley because he thought he lost Aziraphale.

I keep seeing people say they want Aziraphale to know what it would feel like to lose Crowley, but I'm pretty sure my eyes weren't the only ones open when this happened...

Right?

"And that was the last I was to see of Crowley for some time."

Aziraphale has lost Crowley. To Hell.

He could do nothing to stop what happened in Edinburgh, and I can't imagine that he didn't fear he'd lost Crowley for good here.

Aziraphale has experienced more heartbreak than some fans care to even acknowledge. He exists in constant fear of losing Crowley to Hell again. AGAIN.

We saw Aziraphale save Crowley from Hell in 1941 with the human magic trick he used on Furfur.

Aziraphale was the one sitting in the bathtub of holy water after the Notpocalypse, knowing this was the reason he'd been so scared to hand Crowley his own thermos of holy water in the first place.

He's lost Crowley to Hell before and he will do anything to prevent it from happening again.

That's the impact Edinburgh had on Aziraphale. This is the impact that losing Crowley had on Aziraphale.

Yes! And it’s clear Aziraphale fears for Crowley’s safety especially if the arrangement was discovered. See the theatre scene for instance (“they would destroy you”).

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Is it only me or should we be more worried about the fact that hell can just kidnap Crowley whenever and from wherever they want?

I mean, this is scary, right? Goodness I don’t know how Crowley doesn’t have severe anxiety (well, maybe he does^^) with the threat of being dragged down to Satan knows what terrible fait every moment of every day. And when Beelzebub does it in s2, he isn't even working for them anymore.

In the theoretical case that Aziraphale and Crowley had run off (to Alpha Centauri or wherever): Could hell just get Crowley back anyway? Is he just lucky they chose not to interfere after the holy water bath? What would happen if they really wanted to control him?

And if hell can drag Crowley down, can heaven pull Aziraphale up? Would they have done so if he hadn’t agreed to go?

I have so many questions! And this goes back to the “former demon” and “former angel” thing as well. What are they? Can they choose not to be associated with heaven or hell or will their ex-head-offices always have control over them no matter what?

Also: I wonder why they sent Hastur and Ligur after Crowley in s1 if they could have just pulled him down. Same goes for the kidnapping before the holy water/hellfire incident. Oh. What would have happened if they had tried to drag down body-swapped Crowley? Who would they have gotten? The body or the "spirit"? This is interesting...

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You know how Crowley is like: "Why don't you just go by train? You love trains."

The more important question is: Why would you go by car? It takes 7 hours 43 minutes (probably a lot longer with Aziraphale driving) from London to Edinburgh according to google maps. The train only takes about 5 hours. Why Aziraphale? It's not like he needs the car. He goes from one major city to the next - plenty of public transport available.

Maybe Aziraphale just really wanted to drive his demon's Bentley. Just a nice road trip to properly investigate the clue.

Or was that just an excuse to talk about the whole "our car" and "our bookshop" thing? Is it Aziraphale's way of making clear they are a unit? Or that it's okay for Crowley to move in?

Right. Great. Now road trip facts give me the feels too. 😭

My question is why do other demons and angles pop up whoever they want (maybe angels not so much, because they keep walking to where to need to be? But certainly show up in vicinity, Gabriel appeared just fine in episode 1 though)

BUT THESE two need earthly apparatus is move about when once … they didn’t either (Noah and Jesus and Job)

What’s that about? Only gone native?

I mean, if we look at the way they got to Tadfield, I would assume they need human transportation. Because otherwise they would have miracled there right? It was pretty urgent after all.

Maybe they can "fast-travel", but only with the help of heaven/hell? (Like coming down from heaven with the elevator close to where you want to be?) Which they couldn't do to prevent the Apocalypse ofc.

Or maybe it just draws a lot of miracle power and attention, so they generally don't do it?

In Paris Crowley asks why Az doesn't just perform another miracle to go home. Which suggests to me, he isn't only talking about getting out of prison, but the journey as well. And Az says that he can't, because of the frivolous miracle thing. That would mean that they could theoretically "fast-travel" by miracle, but heaven/hell would know, if they did.

But yea maybe they just like it the slow human way (haha no pun intended. Well, maybe a little^^). Crowley loves his car. And apparently Az likes taking the train. Same with food. They don't need it, but they still eat. Going native indeed.

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SO THE THING IS.

THE THING. IS.

A) A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square came out in 1940.

B) They clearly both KNOW the reference, they KNOW it’s their song, it MEANS something to them.

C) SOMETHING else happened in 1941 that we haven’t seen yet.

LISTEN.

I’ve seen everyone talk about how that final part of 1941 is going to give context to the “you go too fast for me” BUT have y’all thought about how much fucking context it’s going to give to “[perhaps we could] dine at the Ritz”????

If they heard that song and had a MomentTM that changed their relationship, and THEY BOTH KNEW what it meant, even though they wouldn’t say it out loud.

AND THEN AZIRAPHALE GOES AND SAYS THAT ?????

Hey, you know that song about angels falling in love while dining at the Ritz? DON’T LOOK SO DISAPPOINTED, PERHAPS ONE DAY WE COULD DINE AT THE RITZ.

AND CROWLEY KNOWS WHAT THAT MEANS, he was THERE when that code was unwittingly established. He knows EXACTLY what Aziraphale is really saying here, AND AZIRAPHALE KNOWS THAT HE KNOWS, CAN ANYONE HEAR ME—

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the goat-shadowing

Did we notice this? The goats and the kids are in the same frame just as Crowley says "You can't kill kids" in the flood scene in s1.

Does that remind us of someone who also doesn't want to kill kids - or goats?

This can't be a coincidence, right? And this is where this cute goat post takes a dark turn:

Did Crowley see them all (goats and kids) die horribly during the flood? Could he not bear the thought of letting it happen again? Does it haunt him to this day?

I'm sad about goats now. Bye.

(sorry if this isn't new information - I just noticed and it blew my mind)

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Crowley and Job

I'm sure this has been written before but I haven't read it so here's my thesis:

The Job minisode is a metaphor for Crowley.

The Job minisode shows us that this God is willing to put her favourites through significant pain, to have them lose everything, to carry out the ineffable plan. In fact, God considers their favourites to be the only ones able to endure this and remain "faithful" or "good." Funny that, as we see Crowley - a Demon who has every reason to hate God and do a lot of evil - continually showing himself to have a stronger moral compass than the Archangels.

Job is stripped of absolutely everything he has, one after another. Starting with his livelihood, his possessions, his home and finally his most loved thing - his children (sounding familiar at all?). Crowley loses his status, his identity, his job, his flat and ultimately Aziraphale.

Job is angry but not at God, he's angry at himself. He questions how much he must have done wrong to not even know what it is he did (sound familiar?)

When Job talks to God at the end, the first thing she says to him is "You have questions for me Job?" and then she responds with a series of questions back to him. She isn't angry at him asking questions.

He then returns to Sitis, a broken man, to be saved by an Angel and a Demon who reinstate his children to him, having kept them safe the entire time.

How fortunate for God that a particular Angel and Demon pair have quietly ensured that some of the most disturbing plans of Heaven and Hell have never made it to fruition.

How interesting that we see Crowley going through each of the pains of Job.

At the end of S2, Crowley is metaphorically sitting, head in hands, wondering what he did that was so wrong to deserve this.

What if the answer is nothing? What if the answer is he did everything right?

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crowzirawho

I think it's interesting how aziraphale was technically the first one to acknowledge that him and crowley are on the same side. when aziraphale realized crowley didn't destroy job's goats, he was grinning, crowley straight up denied that they're on the same side, and aziraphale responded sarcastically.

of course, crowley quickly said "temporarily not on different sides" but aziraphale wasn't even having the "temporarily".

what's particularly interesting about the Job-isode is that Aziraphale tries to convince Crowley to go against God's plan (as confirmed by the Archangels). So he isn't just acknowledging they're on the same side, but that they are on a unique side (neither aligned with heaven nor hell) although I'm not sure he fully realises the implications of what he says and does until the end of the minisode.

I agree that Az doesn’t realise the implications at that point.

But, and I’m sorry, but he might also still consider his side to be gods side despite everything that went down.

Because even while defying god’s will, AZ still thinks that killing the kids is not what god actually wants. He says as much to Crowley.

And later he says to Crowley “you’re a little bit on our side” - our as in heaven/god. And when Crowley asks him what side he is on he says “god’s side of course”.

So Az could interpret Crowley not destroying the goats to mean he is on god’s side. Not their own.

I don’t think he’s made the leap in the job story quite yet. (Not his fault really, he has been fed the “party line” for a long time). But he is getting there, although not quite in the same way as Crowley.

(“that’s just how it started for me. See you in hell.” - but he doesn’t actually fall for that or anything he does later.)

It would be consistent with AZ’s actions in s1 too. He thinks that if he just talks to the right people (god), they will stop Armageddon. He really believes god wants to do good.

(And I think that is why he hasn’t fallen. He defies heaven the organisation, but not god or what he thinks god is. Well, except for the bit about the flaming sword *cough*)

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eviebane

How have I never noticed this before

I never asked to be a demon. I was just minding my own business one day and then... "Oh, looky here, it's Lucifer and the guys." OK, the food hadn't been that good lately. I didn't have anything on for rest of that afternoon. Next thing, I'm doing a million-light-year freestyle dive into a pool of boiling sulphur.

Angels don't eat, it's even frowned upon. It's a pretty good clue that Crowley is not in fact a reliable narrator of his Fall

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Aziraphale and blasphemy

You know what I find hilarious? When Aziraphale and Crowley see God talking to Job we have this little exchange:

Aziraphale: "Oh, my God." Crowley (not yet seeing what is happening): "Blasphemy, angel? That's not like... you.". Aziraphale (pointing out literal God): "No look! Oh... My God!"

From this conversation we can conclude that both Aziraphale and Crowley consider it blasphemy to "use the Lord's name in vain" (the 3rd commandment).

Well, but you know when Aziraphale does it again? And this time for real? That's right! Paris ⬇️

Which leads us to Aziraphale's perfectly sensible list of reasons to break God's commandments:

  • Doing the right thing (which includes debating complicated moral questions to justify the decision and then still beating himself up about it afterwards)
  • Crowley in that outfit

And I love that!

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I can’t believe I still notice new (at least new to me) things to get hung up on in GO. In this scene ⬇️ Crowley says to Nina: “Just for once in your life trust something.”

How does he know that? How does he know she never trusts anything? He doesn’t. At least not from the interactions we see on screen.

But we know that Crowley and Nina (and Aziraphale and Maggie) are set up to be quite similar.

For example: Before that Nina says to him that she’s going home to “drink herself senseless in an empty flat”. Probably exactly what Crowley would (will? 😭) do.

So my guess is: Crowley is assuming Nina never trusts anything, because he doesn’t.

He has been kicked out by heaven back when he was probably more trusting (“how much trouble can I get into just for asking a few questions”). And since then he always had to watch his back, because being on his own side put him in constant danger from hell (see whatever happened after Edinburgh that made him feel like he needed insurance).

And that also goes for his relationship with Aziraphale. From the very beginning the angel constantly rebuffs (or outright rejects) him (not admitting they’re friends, you go too fast for me, there is no our side etc.). Don’t get me wrong, Crowley trusts Aziraphale with his life. And I am sure he holds none of it against him (they both are victims of the circumstances). But he doesn’t trust that the “peaceful fragile existence” they have now will last.

Nina says as much to him. “You’re the hard bitten one who can never trust anyone ever again.”

Which brings us to the final 15. Crowley is ready to trust. To confess. But it doesn’t go that way and that probably doesn’t surprise him. He is resigned to the fact that things don’t work out for him. He had hoped of course (he is an optimist), but he is very used to “being the bad guy” (“Unforgivable that’s what I am”). He doesn’t trust himself to be enough.

I will cry now. Bye.

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We gotta talk about Rome, y'all.

So, the flashback in Rome is pretty much exclusively the only time Crowley is actively short with Aziraphale and it has always sort of itched in my brain as to why. When I finally got my hands on the script book it started to make sense:

For the uninitiated, Caligula was a Roman Emperor so despicable that there's literally a wiki dedicated to his atrocities.

Some of the deplorable things he was said to have done include, but aren't limited to:

  • Ordering criminals to be fed to the wild animals used for Gladitorial entertainment, after having cut their tongues out
  • Decapitating and butchering several people
  • Beating a priest to death with a mallet
  • Crucifying, burning, and suffocating multiple people
  • Literally having a Senator he disliked ripped apart by a mob

With this in mind, we know that Crowley, despite his indifferent attitude toward his demonic assignments, actively works against hurting people and animals, and even though his dialogue implies that he never tempted Caligula, we don't actually know what he might have witnessed. Still, it's not at all out of the realm of possibility that he saw things that could have straight up left him scarred psychologically.

Though the filmed scene leaves this portion of the conversation out, including his failed rebuff of Aziraphale's company, it's clear that he's in some emotional distress. With this in mind, Aziraphale's appearance may have occurred at just the right time. If he saw even just a hint of the monstrosity and madness of Caligula, he'd have needed some sort of comfort, so Aziraphale's stupid question and temptation for oysters may have been the best thing that could have happened under the circumstance.

Plus, given Aziraphale's ignorance about Caligula (he was there for Nero,) he'd have no idea how badly Crowley was messed up. He never reacted to Crowley's irritation or boarish attitude with anything other than continued enthusiasm for his presence. Demonhood has likely been incredibly tragic and traumatizing for Crowley at times, and, in this scene, Aziraphale was a balm for that pain without ever knowing.

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