James: *does literally anything*
Remus: Are you fucking serious!?
James: No, but you are.
Sirius: Are you suggesting I occasionally stray from the rule book?
Remus: No. I'm suggesting you do not owan a rule book, and if you do, you have certainly never opened it.
James: Remus! Remus, it's Sirius, he's back!
Remus: Thanks god he's back alive, I'm going to kill him!
James: Sirius is acting crazy!
Remus: Crazy for Sirius, or crazy for ordinary people?
Remus: How's he doing?
James: Unfortunately, he's still Sirius.
Remus: That's terrible.
"Will you be the G to my ayy?"
Sirius, proposing to Remus.
[Sirius sees someone flirting with Remus.]
Remus: You seem awfully quiet today.
Sirius: No one plans murder out loud.
Sirius: If they want to get to their seat . . .
Remus: They'll have to set through us?
Sirius: they'll have to suCK MY DICK.
Remus: waiT NO
Remus: Don't do anything stupid.
Sirius: Both you and I know that's asking too much of me.
Sirius: Waffles are just pancakes with abs.
Remus: sometimes I wonder how your mind works.
Remus: Where are my fucking keys?
Sirius: Remus, Harry is here, you might wanna say that a little nicer.
Remus: May I ascertain the whereabouts of my fucking keys?
Remus: I have the sex appeal of a math book.
Sirius: I don't know, I've never met anyone that opened a math book and didn't think 'fuck me'.
Remus:
Sirius: Birth certificates are just receipts for human beings.
Remus: How and where can I return myself?
James: We need to go! Come out!
Sirius: I'm gay!
James: Not what I meant but I support you!
Sirius: Let's be more than friends.
Remus: Best friends?
Sirius: No, more than that.
Remus: . . . mega best friends?
James: Why are we lying in a parking lot?
Sirius: You got your ass kicked unconscious - so I laid down next to you so people would think we were just chillin'.
Sirius: So . . . Come here often?
Remus: this is my fucking house.