Jiang Cheng: And, like, you guys go on all those long, long walks in the woods. How awkward would it be if one of you were gay?
Wei Wuxian, glancing at Lan Wangji: Yeah, it would be awkward if ONE of us were gay.
Lan Wangji: You have friends, and I envy that.
Wei Wuxian: You're welcome to share my friends.
Lan Wangji: *looks at Jiang Cheng and and the Nie Huaisang*
Lan Wangji: I don't want those.
Wei Wuxian: There’s a special place in hell reserved just for me.
Wei Wuxian: Its called The Throne.
Jiang Cheng: *drops iced coffee*
Jiang Cheng: I’m so sick of fucking living.
Jin Ling: Who’s turn is it to give the pep-talk?
Lan Sizhui, sighing: Lan Jingyi’s…
Lan Jingyi: Fuck shit up out there, but don’t die.
Ouyang Zizhen, wiping away a tear: Inspirational.
Jin Ling: Damn it, the power went out.
Lan Jingyi: Don’t worry dude I got this.
Lan Jingyi: *shakes rapidly and stomach starts to illuminate*
Jin Ling: WHAT?!
Lan Jingyi: I swallowed a flashlight.
Jin Ling: WHY WOULD YOU-
Lan Wangji: Let's get married.
Wei Wuxian: What was that?
Lan Wangji: What?
Wei Wuxian: You said something.
Lan Wangji: I didn't hear what you said.
Wei Wuxian: No, you said- you said something.
Lan Wangji: ...No.
My uncle may have raised an emotionally vacant child with severe depression and anxiety, but he didn’t raise a quitter
Jin Ling
Nie Huaisang: We're friends. I was building up to call you "A-Cheng" one of these days.
Jiang Cheng: That will never happen. In fact, you just lost "Jiang Cheng" privileges. From now on, you can call me "Sandu Shengshou" or "Hey you".
Nie Huaisang: Come on, Jiang Cheng.
Jiang Cheng:
Nie Huaisang: Come on, hey you.
Lan Wangji: The stars are beautiful tonight.
Wei Wuxian: Yeah, they are.
Lan Wangji: Do you know what else is beautiful?
Wei Wuxian: [blushes] What?
Lan Wangji: Not your cooking, that's for sure.
Nie Huaisang: *jokingly* What's going on? Geez, who died?
Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng: ...
Nie Huaisang: Oh, god. Who died?
I actually have another plan. It’s not as smart, but it’s definitely more dumb. And for whatever reason, I sometimes feel like my dumb plans work better.
Wei Wuxian
I'm in a bad mood and somebody is going to suffer.
Jiang Cheng
Lan Wangji: When I first met you, I did not like you.
Su She: I'm aware of that.
Lan Wangji: But then you and I had some time together.
Su She: Uh-huh.
Lan Wangji: It did not get better.
Jiang Cheng: Mom, I had a feeling today.
Madam Yu: Well, don't, son.
Wei Wuxian: We'll stand together even in life and death.
Wen Qing: Probably death.
Wei Wuxian: Death for sure.
Madam Yu: [to Jiang Cheng] You always cease to amaze me.