Midorima: I’m turning my phone into airplane mode.
Takao: Oh my god, he doesn’t even do that on airplanes!
Midorima: All we need is a ruse.
Takao: You had me at ruse.
Midorima: That was the last thing I said.
Takao: Good thing you said it.
Midorima: I was moved by your speech, Takao.
Takao: Thank you, Shin-chan. That’s very nice of you to say.
Midorima: The syntax was problematic.
Takao: Less nice.
Takao: Don’t blame Shin-chan for his cold and reserved personality, he’s just a tsundere who sometimes needs a little help getting out of his comfort zone!
Takao: Also known as the only Zone he’s ever been in!
Midorima: You’re not helping.
[Shuutoku having dinner]
Takao: Vegetable oil is made from vegetables, coconut oil is made from coconuts, so is baby oil-?
Midorima: Can’t we just have a nice dinner for once?
Takao: *dramatically tossing magazine away* It’s all lies! Lies and slander!
Midorima: Mm, no. Slander is spoken. In print, it’s libel.
Takao: What do you think about spicing things up?
Midorima: You know I can’t handle spicy food.
Takao: No, I mean in the bedroom.
Midorima: I can’t handle spicy food anywhere, Takao.
Midorima: Just how many fights do you think I’ve been in?
Takao: Negative three.
Midorima: …Zero.
Miyaji: Someone fight him.
Kuroko: You like Midorima? For his personality?
Takao: I know, I was surprised too.
Takao: I sort of did something and I need your advice, but I don’t want any judgement or criticism.
Midorima: And you came to me?
Takao: Oh, Shin-chan, c'mon! What’s with that face?
Midorima: It’s called disappointment, I’m sure you’re used to seeing this look.
[as adults]
Midorima: You’re 26, you have to have an apartment and at least two cars.
Takao: Jesus is more than 2000 years old and He still lives with his Father, please don’t stress me out.
Takao: [groggily] You’re sexy~
Midorima: [examining him] Takao, you have a concussion!
Takao: Maybe, but you're still seeexy~
[on a first date]
Takao: So, what do you do?
Midorima: I’m currently trying to eliminate all cancers.
Takao: Wow, impressive.
Midorima: Then I’ll move on to virgos.
Midorima: What? What plan?
Takao: I’m not telling you.
Midorima: Why not?
Takao: Because you won’t like it.
Midormima: [seductively takes off glasses]
Midormima: Wow...
Takao: [blushing] Shin-chan...
Midormima: You’re really fucking blurry.
Takao: Hey, captain, where do you want this smoke machine?
Midorima: That’s a toaster.
Takao: Any machine can be a smoke machine if you use it incorrectly.