@incorrectbatfam / incorrectbatfam.tumblr.com
That’s sucks about the nsfw thing but I have to say I hope Trump wins because Harris is for more gun control which doesn’t do crap except make it harder for legal guns to get out, gun control doesn’t do crap to stop criminals from getting them
I'd argue differently because it shouldn't have been so easy for me, a mentally ill alcoholic, to legally get a license and firearm myself
Hey everyone I'm officially announcing my run for the 2024 presidential election and the first thing I'll do when I'm elected is repeal the Second Amendment for everyone except Jason Todd because he deserves a treat
I can beat papa bat
Grandpa Alfred just loaded his shotgun
immortal butler with a shotgun
You're still serving the same depressed furry
Monthly rent-lowering gunshots
What are the rules in the house? Wrong answers
1) Pants must be worn in the presence of company.
2) If groceries are still alive and moving, e.g. lobsters, it is forbidden to shoot at them while calling them "six-legged marine [insert any expletive]."
3) No falling asleep whilst sharpening batarangs.
4) No throwing pool parties in the master bath.
5) Caffeine shall not be given to Impulse on Manor grounds.
6) A maximum of 4 people may swing from the chandelier simultaneously.
7) No holding yourself for ransom.
8) Street signs must be returned within 24 hours of taking unless otherwise specified.
9) Activated smoke pellets may not be sent in the mail.
10) No overnight guests in the graveyard without prior approval.
11) No gender reveal parties. Gender unreveal parties are acceptable so long as they do not incite a natural disaster or result in more than 2 injuries.
12) Shoes are not a substitute for a litter box.
13) If a dispute cannot be solved through civil conversation or sparring, it shall be turned over to the Wayne Family Court for a trial by jury (see article 3 section 3 of the Wayne Family Constitution for more details).
14) Spaceship valets must be scheduled 8 hours in advance. For information on parking validation, please contact Alfred.
15) Events will be updated daily in the Wayne Family Newsletter. To submit an article, email [email protected].
I do wanna go batshit, but just being a skeptic here when I ask, are you a lefty?
I'm right-handed when it comes to writing, sports, and tools—I actually signed Cass's signature with my left hand to make it seem like someone who learned to write very recently. With firearms and musical instruments I'm slightly ambidextrous though
Now I’m curious: who else fits the “(person A) is (person B) if (person A) had (something)”? I’m thinking Jason and Steph…
Jason is Steph if Steph was a 6'2" dude with guns
how do i tumblr? I'm asking the bat-fam, NOT YOU
Dick: trust the Tumblr veterans. Or maybe don't. We enjoy fucking with people
Jason: understand color theory
Tim: lose Yahoo $1B by being yourself
Damian: make sure you have a camera to look into like The Office for when you read the worst takes you'll ever see
Duke: for the love of god please reblog
Cullen: Supernatural is the simplest and least chaotic fandom to get into
Stephanie: the only profile pic you need is the shitty Picrew representation of yourself
Cassandra: leave your innermost thoughts in the tags and pray no one screenshots them
Barbara: the key to fandom popularity is a blog dedicated to copying and pasting the same 10 overused quotes and slapping different characters' names on them
Harper: if you look like a bot, you'll get treated like a bot
Carrie: piss in the ball pit, I dare you
Kate: not sure about the rest of you, but I assume people here are gay by default
Alfred: sometimes the app or dashboard will do something that makes you wonder what staff is smoking. That's our way of firing a gun to keep property values down
Selina: Madonna is here but literally no one cares
Bruce: if Elon Musk tries to get on this site, we collectively bully him off like we did with Alex Jones
Alfred's best guns and who their equivalent be in the Batfam? (If possible plz)
Dick: Justice League t-shirt gun
Jason: gun gun (it shoots smaller guns)
Tim: coffee grounds gun
Damian: tiny swords gun
Duke: spiderweb gun
Cullen: Furby gun
Stephanie: grape soda gun
Cassandra: batarang gun
Barbara: printer ink gun
Harper: ground beef gun
Carrie: funfetti gun
Kate: black tar gun
Alfred: tea and scones gun
Selina: hairball gun
Bruce: marmite gun
Hi, What does Alfred think of Ghostmaker?
"Bet I can make more ghosts"
*cocks gun*
What does Alfred get each kid when they move out
Dick: a small loan of a million dollars
Jason: an anti-crowbar gun
Tim: Young Justice-proof windows
Damian: knowing Bruce's genetics, the same thing he got him
Duke: a one-of-a-kind state-of-the-art ten-slice toaster for when his siblings inevitably crash at his place
Cullen: a roommate
Stephanie: his secret cookie recipe
Cassandra: five extra mattresses
Barbara: a blender because she's the only trustworthy one
Harper: soundproof wall panels, for the neighbors' sake
Carrie: an indoor trampoline because her neighbors suck
Bruce when he went to college: a year's worth of microwave meals. You put them in the microwave and hit "add 30 seconds." No need to poke the film or fiddle with any other buttons. It's one step. You cannot possibly screw this up or I will revoke your title as the head of Wayne Manor and tell the whole Justice League you need to be bottle-fed like a baby, you powdered sugar donut
i saw "senanigans/feuds that have arisen since mario kart" and for some reason i read that as marie kondo
Shenanigans and feuds that have arisen because of Marie Kondo:
Shenanigans and feuds that have arisen because of Mario Kart?
