Vander: Powder, you can't bite people you simply don't like!
Powder: God forbid women do anything.
Silco: How many of you freaks do I have to fight?
Vander: Oh I'm the only one that matters. You mess with my children and now I'm going to fuck you!
Vi, whispering: It's "fuck you up", dad.
Vander: Wait, what did I say?
Vander, to the kids: Thanks for choosing me to be your dad.
Vi: Hey old man?
Vander: Yeah?
Vi: There’s a small get together at my school on Friday?
Vander: How small?
Vi: You, me and the principal.
Vander: Vi, don't steal any beer while I'm gone.
Vi: What kind of pathetic drunk do you take me for? Someone spilled beer in this ash tray!
Vander: Sometimes, people ask how I manage my kids so easily. The secret is - I don't. I have no control over them whatsoever.
Vander: Earlier, Vi called for me, and when I showed up to see what was going on, Mylo shot me in the throat with a nerf gun.
Vi: Hey, Vander, can I borrow $500?
Vander: Sure, but why do you need $500?
Vi: For an escape room.
Vander: What escape room costs $500?
Vi: …Jail.
Vi: I think I got your lunch.
Vi: *pulls out a note saying: "I am very proud of you. Love, Vander"*
Powder: Oh yeah. I didn't think this was for me.
Powder: *holds up a note saying: "Be good. For the love of God please be good."*
Vander: Now be good while I'm at the parent-teacher meeting. I'll bring back dinner.
Vi: What are we gonna have?
Vander: Well, that depends on what your teachers say. If you've been good, pizza. If you've been bad... uh... let's see... poison.
Vi: What if one of us has been good and one of us has been bad?
Jinx: Poison pizza.
Vander: Oh, no. I'm not making two stops.
Vi: I don’t even wanna talk to her until I know for sure that she’s gay!
Vander: Hmm…
Vi: Wait, what are you d—
Vander: Excuse me, Caitlyn! What color lipstick are you wearing?
Caitlyn: Oh, I don’t wear lipstick! Just chapstick.
Vander: Oh, nice!
Vander, passing by Vi: Gay.
Powder: My turn. Kwyjibo. K-W-Y-J-I-B-O, 22 points, plus triple word score, plus 50 points for using all my letters. Game's over, I'm outta here.
Vi: Wait a minute, you little cheater. You're not going anywhere until you tell me what a kwyjibo is.
Powder: Kwyjibo. Uh... a big, dumb, balding ape. With no chin.
Vander: And a short temper.
Vi: I'll show you a big, dumb, balding ape!
Powder: Uh-oh! Kwyjibo on the loose!
Arcane Characters as Reductress Headlines (Part 1?)
#arcane#league of legends#riot games#league of legends caitlyn#league of legends vi#league of legends jinx#league of legends jayce#league of legends viktor#arcane mel#arcane vander#arcane silco#league of legends ekko#arcane sevika#caitlyn kiramman#vi#jinx#jayce talis#viktor#mel medarda#vander#silco#ekko#sevika#not a textpost#my edit#reductress
Claggor: Vi got into a fight.
Vander: Oh, no.
Vander:
Vander: At least, did she win?
Vander: You need to react when people cry.
Silco: I did. I rolled my eyes.
incorrect-piltover-quotes reblogged
Arcane characters as Wattpad comments:
Bonus because Tumblr won't let me post more than ten pics in a post:
#arcane netflix#caitlyn kiramman#cassandra kiramman#jayce talis#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#tobias kiramman#league of legends vi#vi#league of legends jinx#jinx#arcane silco#silco#arcane vander#vander#league of legends viktor#viktor#league of legends heimerdinger#heimerdinger#arcane sevika#sevika#league of legends#arcane#riot games#tagging this as nsfw#nsfw#not a textpost#my edit#reblog
Arcane characters as Wattpad comments:
#arcane#arcane netflix#caitlyn kiramman#cassandra kiramman#jayce talis#mel medarda#ambessa medarda#league of legends vi#vi#league of legends jinx#jinx#arcane silco#silco#arcane vander#vander#league of legends viktor#viktor#league of legends heimerdinger#heimerdinger#tobias kiramman#league of legends#riot games#tagging this as nsfw#nsfw#not a textpost#my edit
Vander: What do you have in there?
Powder: A knife!
Vander: NO!