hey man i'm going on vacation for 86 yoctoseconds can you watch my pet hydrogen-5 isotope while i'm gone

Adult friendships be like “I miss you bro, let's hang out in November"

settings > my shower > manage my shower

water 🟩

soap 🟩

corner spider ⬜️

​me but i would turn the corner spider setting on #spiderlover #spiderfan #spidersarecool #spider #spiders

everyone shut the fuck up and look at this snake named barcode

Everyone's thinking "witch" but the owl was actually going as a cowboy.

Iirc the original images are from years ago, and everyone was worried that the owl was actually stuck to the toy - but apparently the townspeople had seen him put it down to hunt and such, and then go back to pick it up again. Which straight up triples my enjoyment of this story.

This is my favorite Stanley Parable review

i'm fucking choking

making one of those "why i left the left" grifter videos but it's increasingly obvious i was exclusively hanging out with people who draw che guevara and fidel castro getting eachother pregnant and have based my entire conception of communism off of that

our server's weekly movie voting rules

War has changed.

It’s like every week something weird happens.

I can’t even begin to imagine how many episodes would be improved just by Picard giving a stumbling, awkward exposition of the episode’s plot to the crew

ALL episodes could be improved if we saw Picard’s awkward, stumbling exposition to the crew of what’s going on that episode. In fact, I really wanna see that.

“Attention crew, this is your captain speaking. You may notice my voice sounds different, and uh, long story short, I’m 12 again. Another transporter thing, we should really get that looked at. Anywhooo if a little blonde kid starts ordering you around, don’t ignore him, because it’s me. Ok. Bye.”

“Okay so, you may have noticed large parts of the ship transforming into some kind of Mayan temple, and Commander Data running around and talking in several different voices. We are aware of the situation and taking steps to restore things to normal.”

Oh man my poptarts leaked :c

I discovered the hammock!

(It has been there for the last year, he couldn't figure it out)

Outlines of two alligators that slept through the rain.

oh you're a cis woman? you look good i couldn't tell!