Narrator: Celeborn. Everyone wants to know why he seems not to have any facial expressions whatsoever.
Elrond: You really do not know? Well, it is rather simple. You see, he has to spend some time with family during the War of the Ring. Everyone has that one relative they would rather not see more than once every few thousand years.
Thranduil: I see him all the time, Elrond. I cannot help but see him. His wife glows in the dark. She is so bright, you can see them from Mordor. I am surprised Sauron has not gone blind.
Sauron: I’m good. I wear a specialty lens I got from LensCrafters of Barad-dûr. Goes from inside to outside in seconds.