i’m dying at the ratio of re/quote tweets to likes

A-List????

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

If I were tumblr famous this would be a smash hit

It’s practically 2014 and you guys still don’t know how to google if an article is real or not before giving it 100,000 notes

it used to be 2007 you know

All the adults should put in the tags how old they were in 2007

I was a foetus. Not even born yet.

I turned 5 in December of 07

now for the ultimate test. go to this website. set it to randomly generate ONE pokemon. all generations. all types. whatever it generates? thats you as a pokemon forever. what you get is what you get. NO RE ROLLING. now. who are you? i got goomy :^)

YAYY I GOT WOOLOO

Eevee!

Wait do I get to evolve or…

what the fuck?

I can’t believe hatecrimes MD is real

this sucks so bad i need to [remembers suicide jokes only worsen my mental health] put on the best talent show this towns ever seen

mark my words . Mark . My Words. give them back .mark

you may have heard of wilson wednesday, house thursday, and foreman friday. now get ready for taub tuesday.

don’t!!! fake!!!! your!!!! interests!!!! to!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

don’t!!! bury!!!! your!!!! interests!!! to!!!!! make!!!! someone!!!! like!!!!! you!!!!

don’t!!! go!!! wasting!!! your!!! emotion!!! lay!!! all!!! your!!! love!!! on!!! me!!!

don’t!!! go!!! chasin’!!! waterfalls!!! please!!! stick!!! to!!! the!!! rivers!!! and!!! the!!! lakes!!! that!!! you’re!!! used!!! to!!!

me, as i force a dollar bill into the self-checkout machine: thats right…..good boy……vore president washington

im begging all of you to stop reblogging th is

what if i just rest my eyes for a second

what if i just check out whats going on under this cozy blankie for like a minute. two minute

oh no