The Brat | [Ivar the Boneless x Reader]

❛ pairing | king Ivar x wife!Reader

❛ genre | drabbly bits

❛ summary | he loves the blood, you hate the blood. but you do so love him. maybe he can persuade you.

❛  warnings | mentions of violence, sexual themes, fulfilled request, king!ivar.

Ivar reeks.

And he loves it. Whether fresh from the battlefield or dealing with insurrections at home, he loves the scent of iron. It embodies his accomplishments, a cruel overcoming of the sort of men who would have mocked him if not for his noble father. They all cried Ragnar when they encountered there could be so-- so much worse. 

He was worse. 

And so, blood-soaked, battle-worn, and revved up-- he looked for his honeysuckle. His sweet honeysuckle who just so happened to detest the scent of blood tacked against his skin. As he pushed apart the flaps of the tent, he spotted your face furrowing. Ah, yes, another fight to be won. 

“Ivar,” you hissed. “Why bother washing in the stream if you are only going to wipe the blood off your eyes?” 

He cackled and brought his bloodied war hammer to scratch the side of his head. Then, moving forward, he dropped his weight on his crutch with every step. “So I can see. The blood blurs my sight, my sweet. And I am but a lowly--” 

“It also reeks.” 

“An unfortunate consequence.” 

Once More, My Sweet | [ivar x reader]

❛ pairing | ivar x reader

❛ type | skankery drabble

❛ request | can we discuss ivar potentially having a crying kink 👀 like he just savours the feeling of tears against his shoulder or seeing them stream down your cheeks knowing he made you feel that good 👀

❛ tags | gentle ivar, fingering, slight skankery, just what i want in life

❛ sy’s notes | oh, to be a thrall.

It’s not that he’s particularly inexperienced.

Rather, King Ivar had to be careful about who he amused himself with. The best course of option was a quiet, gentle girl. Not the sort of conniving woman who had loose legs and looser lips. 

soft kisses | ivar x reader

Christmas is a pointless Christian holiday.

Ivar, for one, does not approve of it. He despises the little angel that once sat on top of a crispy fake tree before he replaced it for a gaudy star. He despises the tree itself. Not for anything egregious it did, but the whirling bullet that was your kitten scaling the thing. There was though, one tradition that seemed to perk a smile on his grinchy growly mouth.

When the doorbell would sing all through the house and only his mind was stirring with the work he had to do inside the house. He’d snatch the wheels of his wheelchair and soar through the house. You were just outside-- with bags of knickknacks little and large-- stubbornly beeping the door over reaching for your key.

He’s well used to it, of course, that’s how it will always be. Christmas was, in a word, non-negotiable.

Drabble: An Accident | [King!Ubbe x Earl!Reader]

❛ pairing | king ubbe x earl reader

❛ type/request | drabble; smut : how ubbe react to his wife/partner/girlfriend jealous or upset after a 3some?

❛ summary | it’s not often he fucks up, but he pisses you off when he does.

❛ tags | verbal arguments, polygyny, public sex, being watched, angry!reader, pregnancy reference (not reader), slight jealousy, bye bye soap. 

❛ sy’s notes | i bear ubbe smut because that’s the only time i write ubbe. a little bit apprehensive as it’s just a simple, plain fic that i wrote a few days ago.

An accident, he said.

You wash his clothes, smashing the bar of soap across clothes battered with dirt and stains and wringing them clean. In distaste you toss his clothes over a branch beside your own and start the trek back down into the stream to clean yourself after a long session of cleaning. It was at the water's edge that you found him sitting with his arms crossed upon a crumbly rock. He shifts.

“Please,” you flick your hand at him, swirling it into a tumbling spiral and snatching a soap of Rus honey by his side. “Don’t bother to get up, your highness, my sweet Ubbe. I would hate to disturb you.”

“It was an accident,” he rasps.

“You’ve said that. But many things are accidents. You, my love, were one great big accident: an accident for Ragnar and an accident to me.”

One For Her I: Five Marks

❛ pairing | ivar x reader, past!freydis x ivar, past!katya x ivar

❛ type | double shot (?)

❛ summary | he never does break a promise. but maybe, somethings are out of his control. alcohol is an easy fix to his problems-- until it isn’t.

❛  tags |  alcoholic, female infertility issues, mention of miscarriage, mention of stillborn, child death, older!ivar, older!reader, will be a family!oriented fic, stepsons: sigtryggr and baldur, depression and withdrawal (reader), magical elements, light alcohol forgetfulness, housewife, verbal arguments and fighting

❛ requests | Hello! Are requests here open? If so, can I get Ivar!Reader where she hates when he's drunk? Thank you!

Can I request 94 and 90 for the angst prompt list with Ivar? Somethings where him and his wife keep losing babies or they are born and die and when they finally have a healthy baby after trying so hard it is born with Ivar’s legs? I want to cry please and thank you.

❛ sy’s notes | hello again. this little fic is very dense, so if you’re triggered by anything i’ve tagged, please be careful when reading.

He’s always been Viking. 

And he’s always been trouble, you remind yourself. Despite that, somehow, you stood with a ring screwed on your finger and as he sits there, on his father’s throne, you’re reminded of that. 

Hvitserk slumped off the mead bench and someone would have to put him to bed. You supposed, that night, it would have to be you. You gathered the thralls, drew the Hvitserk’s spare bed down from the chains upon the wall, and stripped him of his clothes, muddled with the stench of puke and alcohol. 

Yes. Festivals, you could do without.

Mistakes Were Made III: Double Trouble

❛ pairing | ivar x reader, past!freydis x ivar (not in this chapter)

❛ type | multi

❛ summary | he doesn't know when to shut up.

❛  tags | sperm donor fic, general argumentative banter between characters, new characters appear, "fat" talk, Ivar being a bit of an ass,

❛ sy’s notes | hi everyone! i've lost my tag list for some reason, so I've tagged a few people.

There are 621 sperm donors at his company.

Therefore, 621 choices to choose from. If Maoise thought he was spying, on what he loathes to think is you, there are still 620 other choices in the company. 254 have blue eyes like his. Besides, he doesn’t really know which company you went with. As you sat there, looking up at the waiter with eyes too kind for any other man, he reminded himself of that.

“What’re you looking at?” you’d snap.

He glances at you behind his rounded sunglasses, dark with the morning light. He’d chew on his lip, searching for the right answer to your unfortunate question. “Why is it that when other men talk to you, you act like an angel? When I do, you’re a bitch.”

“Such a gentleman,” you quip back. You sit a moment, and think because your eyes quiver as you look off to the distance. Then, biting your lip, you sigh. “It’s how I keep up with you.”

“Me?” he’d prod.

“You’re not exactly the kindest boss in town that I could choose from.”

Bad Poet | [ Hvitserk x Reader ]

❛ pairing | hvitserk x reader, hvitserk/ivar [platonic brother spats]

❛ type | drabble

❛ summary | you know hvitserk gets around-- even without ubbe.

❛ tags | verbal arguments, hvitserk has a crush, ivar is an ass.

❛ sy’s notes | hi. i’m still around; just kind of... tired. i’ll write some snippets, i think.

Hvitserk isn’t exactly the smartest of the Ragnarssons.

You wove a band of leather into your hair as you listened, carefully, and quietly to the brothers at their table. “What kind of poetry is that,” Ivar chided to his brother, tracing the lines of Hvitserk’s drawing tablet. “She won’t want to hear this. Tell her she has pretty eyes.”

“Everyone must tell her that.”

“Who is everyone?” Ivar mocked. “She has no suitors this summer. I paid them off just for you, br--”

You glanced up from your work, catching eyes with Ivar’s bobbing head.

“Shht!” Hvitserk thumped his fist on the table. “Why don’t you shut up?”

“Is she stupid? I’m sure she knows, Hvitserk.”

Say Your Piece III: Pay Up | [ Hvitserk x Reader ]

❛ pairing | modern artist!hvitserk x plus size writer!reader

❛ type | multi

❛ summary | he’s not sure if he’s dreaming-- or if it’s all true. he’s teetering off the thin line of his sanity.

❛ tags | verbal arguments, nsfw scene, dream scenes, suicidal ideation, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, stalker lady, break ups.

❛ sy’s notes | please read my tags.

His dreams were craggy and dark, full of incomprehensible shapes, swirling and drawing him deeper and deeper in, until he’s sure that something might eat him up whole. Like a river monster crocodile god-- in the shape of his wretched book agent whose pursed thin lips left stains that he could never wash off. He didn’t want it, he told himself he couldn’t want it. A sudden and wonderful pressure snatched him from his dreamscape, sent him spiraling back down to the living, where he lay in perfumed pastel blue sheets.

“What the fu--” he might have finished that off, if not for the wonderful pressure crushing his hips. As the haze solidified into definite shapes he finally made out your lovely shape sitting on his belly. The soft satin blue of lingerie. He recognized the scalloped edges of lace. He always imagined it would look like an angel on your skin, sheer and brilliant, and there it was in front of him. Or-- your beautiful ass was, anyway. “Baby girl?”

Itty Bitty | [Hvitserk x Thin!Reader]

❛ pairing | hvitserk x reader

❛ type | drabble

❛ summary | hvitserk likes seeing you all dressed up. but-- he can be a bit stupid about it sometimes.

❛ tags | self confidence issues, thin!reader, creamy is not meaning white so don’t come at me, hvitserk being kinda insensitive, but he’s trying, no smut

❛ sy’s notes | [birthday anon here!] Could you do a one shot with Ivar or Hvitserk x reade where the reader has been trying to love her breasts (they are really small) and is doing fine but is not 100% confident yet so when the things heat up between them she tries to tell him she's afraid that he'll laugh at her, then things go fluffy and smut.

happy birthday anon! I made this request a bit ago but i’ve been frustrated with the ending. No smut here-- but maybe some implication. It didn’t seem to fit.

Hvitserk likes being in dressing rooms. 

He sits patiently in the back of a maze of a dressing room. The pale doors all look the same, doors thrown wide, an array of clothes hanging off silver knobs in wait for an overworked and underpaid woman to come to collect them. He doesn’t blame her for not giving a shit who came in and out of the dressing room. 

Which is how he came to sit on the bench with a smile ear to ear. His lap was a mix of hangers and rejected pieces; eight of them, actually. Bjorn was finally getting married to an amazon woman. No, but really, she engulfed all the family’s women. Her patient, warm smile told him all he needed to know about Gunnhild. She was too good for Bjorn. 

“Like it?” he asked, leaning forward, semi-hard, and waiting for the next reveal. He picked this dress. A plain white dress with a plunging neckline to show your smooth skin. From tits to the navel, Hvitserk couldn’t wait to see it. 

“I’m falling out. If that’s even possible.”

Mine, Mine, Mine | [ Ivar x Reader, Domestic Fluffs ]

❛ pairing | King!Ivar x Queen!Reader

❛ genre | drabble

❛ summary | it’s hard work, appeasing everyone. after he comes home from raid, he just has one question.

❛  warnings | needy, moody, sassy reader, jealousy (reader), he’s just trying to keep up, mention of raid and kidnapping and all that entails.

❛  sy’s notes | hello, hello. after a bit of a health scare and some high-level school stress, i’m back. request from @whenimaunicorn for hand-holding under the table except this reader wasn’t nearly as sweet as i thought she would be and ended up being a moody bitch. 😂

 Crowds filter into his great hall. They want his gold, to hear of his stories, his speeches that will be sung from the lips of a hundred skalds one day—another busy day at the crown of Kattegat’s throne. You move to the chair where you oversaw the depths of Kattegat’s problems while he was away, a timely revolt, and the outlaws you dragged into the sea.  

He smells of sweat and sea salt. He’s left you waiting out at the shore for his flag so long. Then finally, he’s home. The men after glittering pounds of gold, sprawled across the table in front of the throne. The glittering gold on the table has dwindled down to nothing but scraps of bracelets. The women-- oh, you know how they stare, longing that one cherished kiss at the end of his speeches.

It was yours tonight. Like it always should be. You trace the place his lips were, revel in his lasting kiss, and feel his eye settle on you. For just one moment in the lasting moment of this hideously long day, it was okay. Your cheeks fill with a youthful warmth, embarrassed by his eye on your pursed lips. Your hand drops, swirling around the head of a seat his mother sat on once too.

“What is it?”

It’s almost routine, the way his calloused fingers trail over your knuckles. He gingerly caresses the top of your fingers, slipping between the spaces of your knuckles, grazing over and over again until he finds the confidence to hold your hand.

“Did you miss them?” he asks.

Say Your Piece II: Heart Breaker

❛ pairing | hvitserk x reader, hvitserk x ?

❛ type | double triple? shot, mistakes were made au

❛ chp summary | after the reader says she doesn’t want hvitserk; he makes a bad decision. it gets worse from there.

❛  tags | plus size reader, verbal arguments, extreme social anxiety, extreme body insecurity, drinking, hateful words, illustrator hvitserk x writer reader, mention of infidelity, shame, OCs, sexual frustration, blackmail, cheating mentioned, verbal abuse, sexual blackmail, poor communication? it’s more likely than you think. tags to be added.

❛ request | So Hvitserk request (you a asked for it 😂) Remember the Little Lovers event and the self-conscient plus size reader who didn’t want to have sex ?Well I didn’t get the sex lol. I want my Hvitserk to show a woman how her body is enjoyable. Thank you 😊 for @alicedopey

❛ sy’s note | i’ll eventually get you your sex scene, DAMN IT.

He wakes with a blaring headache caused by a stream of fresh morning light against his soft cheek. He pulls his arms around you-- or, what he thought was you, as the moment he does so, he knows it’s wrong. Where soft folds and overflowing breasts were, he finds thin limbs and small breasts.

It’s not your body-- he realizes all at once. The high rise apartment that overlooked the city wasn’t, either. It was the fruit of an accomplished older woman, whose many books hovered on a white shelf beside a white bed. Everything in the room holds the same pure standard. He flings himself from the bed, his naked ass colliding with a nightstand. The items ripple over the surface and settle into new positions. The woman pushes up, dragging the painfully monochrome white fluffy sheet to cover her flat chest. 

“Hvitserk?” 

Erika, in all her sharp-eyed glory, stares right back at him. Vomit spins up his throat, incited by the affection by with her eyes considered him. Hvitserk scrambles over the perfectly plain hardwood floors, upchucking up what’s left of his agitated stomach after his pathetic night out on the town. 

“Hvitserk!”