must there be a title

hot take, but NFTs are actually exposing rich people so fucking hard. you can ignore people holding stock portfolios, yeah? you don’t know what people have invested in, and so you look at tony hawk or eric andre and you’re like, “they normally act cool and are chill people.” but NFTs? ah ah, NFTs are fugly and horrid, but every single fucking person with money is jumping on them because they have money to invest, and this is the new thing making money. it’s exposing the real class divide. at the end of the day, even eric andre or tony hawk or any other seemingly chill rich person wants a better stock portfolio over a better future for society. at best they let a broker or investment consultant tell them what’s making money and don’t pay any attention at all to what - exactly - is making them that money.

[Start ID. A screen cap of the Eric Andre show with text super imposed onto it in all caps that reads "ERIC ANDRE IS DOING NFTS. SORRY IF THIS IS HOW YOU FOUND OUT." End ID.]

[ID: a tweet by kids are still in cages @JoshthePagan "Facts."

There is a big image attached to the tweet that puts seven images of a sketch from the Eric Andre Show together like comic panels. The first six all show Eric Andre shooting a man, who is sitting on an armchair behind him. The only thing that changes is the way they are labeled.

In the first panel the man in the armchair is labeled 'Guatemala' and Andre is 'US backed coup', in the second 'Vietman' and 'US invasion', then 'Brazil' and 'US backed coup', 'Chile' and 'US backed coup', 'Cuba' and 'US sanctions and multiple coup attempts', 'Venezuela' and 'US sanctions and multiple coup attempts'.

In the last panel Andre is turned to the camera and the caption reads, 'Why would socialism do this?'

End ID.]

I agree john mulaney is probably an immortal akin to beings such as keanu reeves and jeff goldblum but he’s like a new born baby immortal who is looking at the long long expanse of a lifetime he has in front of him and is already tired

jeff golblum is thousands of years old and loving it. john mulaney was born in 1901 and ever since 1924 it’s gone downhill for him

So to be clear, the immortal timeline seems to be:

John Mulaney - early 20th century

Eric Andre - Probably 17th century or so.

Taika Waititi - Elizabethan age, probably hung out with Shakespeare

Keanu Reeves - We think sometime around Alexander the Great, but he seems to have just sprung up fully formed.

Jeff Goldblum - 100% Biblical times, may or may not be King Solomon.

Tommy Wiseau - Indeterminate, may be the first Homo Sapiens.