move, bad martini!

fanart on here is so generous i have seen these men and well they do not look like that

me at the club: do you have pursuit ~ lying coldly from ace attorney investigations: miles edgeworth

if someone asked me a week ago what georgia, pennsylvania, nevada, vladimir putin, and the tv show supernatural all had in common, i don’t know what my answer would have been but it would not have been november 5th 2020

being younger than your fave characters and then eventually becoming older than them is such a weird feeling

i dont watch game of thrones but for everyone who does i’m so sorry

The clown epidemic we had in 2016 was camp

the idea of straight women breaking down with their stylists because they’re so incapable of grasping the concept of camp and all they want to do is wear their silk sheath gowns…. as if anna wintour and andrew bolton are at the entrance to the red carpet with crossbows ready to snipe anyone who dare look plainly pretty….. actually yeah anna wintour grow a spine and murder a jenner in front of the met 

Coming-of-age stories would be far more interesting if they weren’t so…white. I’m sorry, but as a first generation immigrant, the stories of teenage girls lashing out at 15 with their parents coddling them/putting up with their behavior just isn’t realistic for kids of color….it’s such a different relationship and dynamic to be in a household that just outright dismisses any mental health issue. I’m not defending that whatsoever, it’s just that coming-of-age stories would be so much more entertaining if they weren’t so white and almost impossible to relate to

stop making jokes. comedy peaked with phineas and ferb.

stop making songs. music also peaked with phineas and ferb

whoever invented chess wasn’t fucking around when they made knights. everything moves in straight lines different ways. simple enough. now there’s a horse that jumps over people in an L shape. thrill ride for the 16th century gamer

i want a wasteland, baby! poster in my room so i can be jason from the good place and whenever something shitty happens i can just lean my forehead against the paper and go “oh hozier, we’re really in it now”

softly, but with feeling: hozier

John Mulaney’s next bit: I was walking down the carpet at the Oscars and everyone started cheering, I thought I had finally made it. Then I looked around and there was Captian fucking America.

I literally heard that in his voice

“my battery is low and it’s getting dark” is so hauntingly human, so crushingly lonely. I can’t articulate the deep, profound ache that sentence evokes. It’s acceptance and defeat and terror and sadness all at once, all from one tiny machine we asked to explore the stars for us.

John Mulaney needs to make another Netflix special cause I already memorized all of his work

jameela jamil is like the only famous person i’ve seen that actually Cares about the way girls are being manipulated. celebrities preach and preach about the body positive movement until it’s time to sell fitness tea on their instagram, or until promoting an extremely unhealthy ideal becomes profitable for them in some way. it’s so gross to spew bullshit about self love to an audience of impressionable young people and then in the very next post demand that they buy x product in order to not be hideous lol