tere hath chumme soneya

gentle reminder you can rise up from everything. you can recreate yourself. nothing is permanent. you are not stuck. you have choices. you can think new thoughts. you can learn something new. you can create new habits. all that matters is that you decide today and never look back.

There is a version of you in the future looking back at who you are now with kindness and understanding, feeling so proud of how hard you are fighting even though your struggles are so painful, feeling glad that you pulled through it with so much strength.

I love using “good catch”

I also say “thanks for the update” or “thanks for the head’s up!”

“I really appreciate the head’s up!” also a classic

If I haven’t gotten back to someone in a swift enough period (i.e. one work day max) I say “thank you for your patience. after some consideration, I have decided…”

don’t apologize for piddly things! 

thank you > sorry

I need to remember

thank you > sorry

Thank you for waiting for me > sorry for being late

Thank you for helping me/for your time/for listening to me > sorry for bothering you

Thanking someone when they do you a favour > apologizing for your existence

This is especially hard when you haven’t been taught that people need to respect your limits, but with a bit of practice you can absolutely get there!

i want to be inconvenienced by you. i want to wait for you, i want to hold your things while you do something else, i want to make adjustments to my plans to make space for you. someone at your side who takes up no space and has no needs of their own is not a person, but a shadow. i don't want a shadow, i want you. i want my life to be altered by your presence in it. please, inconvenience me.

maybe there is no best version of myself. just me, right now, vulnerable and tired and hopeful, willing to show up regardless of what it looks like.

“𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐀 𝐍𝐎 𝐋𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐒 𝐌𝐄; 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅 𝐈 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐃 𝐓𝐎 𝐁𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐋𝐅 𝐈 𝐀𝐌.”

Marya Hornbacher, Madness: A Bipolar Life

Sometimes I wonder if people are only kind because they are told that being kind leads to good karma and good things; so doesn’t that mean people are only kind because it benefits them? But then I remember a stranger running after me in the rain because I dropped some money, a cashier going the extra mile to help me with my things, a store manager helping when I didn’t have enough money on me and I think that kindness is a choice that we make but mostly it is a choice we make unconsciously; no ulterior motives whatsoever and most of the time our actions strive for good.

one thing i’ve learnt is that u can’t put your life on hold for that perfect idealized future moment. thats just condemning your present self to needless repentance and suffering. get that haircut now — not when you’ve lost x amount of weight. go get on that long drive out to the ocean NOW, not when u have that hypothetical daydreamy significant other by your side. you can’t save important life experiences for a self that ultimately doesn’t exist. all you have is you, right now, at this very moment. perfection is a myth anyway, just another perfect word for procrastination. please do not let your life wither away right before your eyes bc u were too busy putting it off

"If we wait until we're ready, we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives." -Lemony Snicket

Here's your daily reminder to be kind to yourself. Times are rough right now, but you've made it this far and I'm proud of you.

Be sure to drink some water, and eat some food, and maybe even wash your face. Your body does everything it can, so do something for it too. 💕

be kind. be ridiculously, radically, endlessly kind. be a part of someone’s good day. send nice thoughts, send positive vibes, send support and love and well wishes. be kind. so often we wish for tomorrow to be a good day when we are at our lowest. some sort of sign that it gets better. be a part of that better day for someone. the world does not magically decide that it will be softer on you today, tomorrow, the next day. and sometimes it starts with a message from someone else, maybe a little bit of inner strength to pull yourself up and take a shower, maybe a bit of sunlight makes the day better. but it’s these small things, these soft things that make a day better. so be kind. don’t ever think about being anything other than kind. be a part of someone’s good day because you don’t know how desperate they might be for it. 

may you find people who happily listen while you gush about your obscure interests. may you find people you feel comfortable and safe enough around to be your authentic self

Things that take time & many tries to get right:

not 2 be corny but. sometimes i think my purpose on this earth is to love people, make them laugh, be kind and share joy. that feels like enough to me sometimes

you can fall in love at 30. you can discover your true passion at 40. you can go back to school at 50. you can learn to draw, or paint, or sing at 60. relax. just because you didn’t do most, or any, of the things considered “young adult milestones” doesn’t mean you never will. there’s no time limit on happiness.

the intimacy of reading while someone you love sits close to you, reading their own book, being so comfortable with each other that it feels natural, like you’re truly home

truly the end goal is not "my close friends aren't annoyed by me and it's all in my head, they're my friends and they love me", it's "sometimes I do annoy my close friends, just as the people I love most will also annoy me sometimes, because this is normal, and we will continue to stay friends, and they're not going to want to immediately cut me out of their life if I do something annoying once in a while"