Hi Heather,
I’m 15-years-old. There is a guy that I’ve liked for quite some time, about two years to be exact. He goes to my school and when I first met him, he was all I ever wished for in a boy… kind, amazing sense of humor, good looking, and a bit cocky. We became very good friends (still are) and I think that at some point he even liked me a bit, but then he got into this “f*ckboy” phase. Soon, all of the boys, him included, only cared about making out, having sex, sexting, and who got the most girls. He has had a few girlfriends who are all shallow but gorgeous, and one is older. He is pretty experienced when it comes to sexual stuff, even though he’s still a virgin. I, on the other hand, have never kissed a boy, not even a peck on the lips. I’ve never had a boyfriend, which I know isn’t bad or something to be ashamed of. Obviously some guys call me a prude, but I couldn’t care less.
A year has passed, and he has completely changed. I’ve had my doubts about him, but he did change. At a recent party, he was a little tipsy and he confessed to me that he wanted to kiss me. The thing is, it’s not that I don’t want to kiss him, I’m just literally TERRIFIED of doing it. My fear of kissing wrong or bad is slowly but surely ruining my chances with this guy. I have this fear in my head that even if he told me it didn’t matter to him if I were bad, he would still secretly judge me. I really want my first kiss to be with this guy, but I’m so scared I don’t know what to do. I’m afraid of being a bad kisser. What can I do to overcome this fear?