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Episode 5 spoilers!

Back in my thoughts again, you know the drill. A bit lengthy!!

I cannot stop thinking about this scene—how Steven clearly remembers that this was his room,

And how he remembers the exact thing he said during this part of the scene, which proves that he was, in fact, in control for at least a couple seconds.

BUT. He doesn’t remember anything from this moment forward. That’s why he wanted to see what their mother did to them, and that’s why Marc was set on getting him out of the room before he saw something that would severely taint his memories and what he knew of their childhood. At the same time, Marc knows EXACTLY what happened.

I’m positive that Steven dissociated at that moment and Marc took over. In general, he didn’t want Steven to remember what truly happened. It’s his way of making up to Randall/RoRo, I would like to believe. He treats Steven like the younger brother that he lost when he was a child. The one who loved drawing the one finned fish. The one who was always eager for adventure. The one who was screaming for help back in the cave.

Remember? His mother explicitly stated:

“Marc, what do you do? Keep an eye on your brother, okay?” And Marc is set on fulfilling that promise to Steven.

Marc let Steven keep all the good memories, while he himself lived through all of the bad ones, just so that he could protect him from getting hurt and feeling pain. Steven, his alter, who he considers to be his little brother.

That’s the reason why Marc was so adamant about simply telling Steven what had happened in that room at the top of the flight of stairs, so Steven wouldn’t have to watch the memory play out in front of him. Seeing what happened would definitely hurt more than just knowing what happened. By telling Steven himself, he would have control over what he would reveal to him, and how he would tell him.

That’s why Marc’s first thought when waking up in the Asylum was Steven. That’s why Marc never complained about fronting right after Steven was pierced by the weapons back in Mogart’s. That’s why Marc probably set up a line for Steven to contact “his mother”, and why Marc replaced Gus with another fish. That’s why Marc didn’t want Steven finding out about him in the first place.

Marc spent most of his life protecting and saving Steven the way he wished he could’ve protected and saved Randall. I am literally bawling over this.

Also ending this with another appreciation for Oscar Isaac because he’s a damn legend for the breathtaking portrayal of Steven AND Marc. He better earn awards for this series or I will riot.

Saw some Steven slander on the tl so buckle up again! Just wanna ramble about some stuff on my head 🤝 might be a long post, but maybe it won’t be, but welcome to my Ted talk, I guess!

There’s something absolutely endearing about Steven Grant. Actually, there are a lot of things endearing about Steven Grant.

It’s the way he’s absolutely passionate about Egyptian mythology, choosing to spend his sleepless nights reading about it, studying hieroglyphics and just anything available to expand his knowledge about the topic. He was concerned enough to tell Donna about the misinterpretation of the Ennead, choosing to still tell her about it even if he knew he’d probably get shot down the second he started talking.

It’s the way he cares so much about Gus, going as far as putting him in the first (and maybe the only?) clear container that he could find, his blender, and bringing him to the pet shop to just to ask if it was normal that he “grew another fin”. He loves the little guy so much, and he probably chose him specifically because he only had one fin and he genuinely wanted to help him.

Its the way he bought Crawley some food with extra pralines, even if the man just sits there and listens while Steven talks to him during his shift. Its the way he’s a vegan, abstaining from consuming meat products, but still respectful to those who don’t have the same ideals.

It’s the way that he doesn’t believe that he’s broken, even if he was losing days of his life for reasons he couldn’t quite understand. It’s the way he as strong enough to say that he needs help.

It’s the way he genuinely just wants to protect the people around him, even if it means getting himself locked up. Wanting to surrender the bag of illegal shit he found in the locker, how he spoke up against child murder when Arthur was explaining the whole situation with Ammit, how he was so set on protecting Layla despite just meeting her, and how he surrendered control to Marc so he doesn’t accidentally hurt anyone else around them.

It’s the way he knows that he’s capable and he’s always wanting and willing to show that he is capable.

It’s the way that he’s … Steven, you know?

((goat gif creds: stevenrogered))

This isn’t even everything but yeah I’m done rambling for now </3 I just love him so much n it’s soft hours for me 🤧 how could you NOT love him??

(Contains snippets from Episodes 1-2)

Let’s talk a little about Marc, shall we? A bit of an appreciation post because I just wanna let these things out, man. Buckle up if you wanna!

After he fronts, he always does his best to put everything back together so Steven feels like everything he did experience (given that he fronts suddenly) was just part of a dream?? Like.

That’s why Steven missed his date completely, because he genuinely thought it was a Friday, but in reality it was a Sunday. So that means Marc reset everything in his apartment so we’ll that Steven couldn’t tell he slept through until Sunday.

I’m also pretty sure Marc replaced Gus when he presumably passed while they were out on the Alps. Marc may have also set up a line for Steven so he could talk to his mother?? (Layla did hint that they don’t talk anymore in episode 2 🥲) He even did his best to comfort Steven and calm him down in the bathroom before fronting and saving them from the jackal in episode 1.

“You’re not gonna die. Let me save us.”

AND. In episode 2???? When Steven goes to their storage locker?? I could sob.

“I know you’re confused. You weren’t supposed to see any of this.”

He tried so SO hard to keep this part of their life away from Steven so he could have a seemingly normal life. He did. And when he couldn’t keep it from his alter, he told him the truth.

THE SUIT SCENE?? When Steven summoned the Mr. Knight suit instead of the ceremonial armor?? All he did was call it psycho Colonel Sanders but he didn’t fight him any more than that!!

And when Steven punched the jackal and sent it flying backwards?? The next time he was able to face Steven,

“That was a hell of a punch back there.”

IM GOING TO COMBUST. His nod?? The little smirk of approval, I dare to say??? HE KNEW Steven did pretty damn well for someone who just found out about all this shit.

And after he fronts and Steven is stuck inside as a reflection?

Yeah.

Just a couple of thoughts 💔

Ep 2 spoiler warning

hold on.

The broken mirror in this scene?? Steven hugging himself? Marc looking over at him with a bloody hand and a bottle of alcohol? Did Steven confront him again, causing Marc to lash out on the mirror again and drink to forget about whatever it was Steven was talking to him about??

“I will never give you a moment of peace. I promise.”

fuck.

Steven, Marc, Jake, Mr. Knight, Moon Knight AND Oscar Isaac share a birthday 🤝

the chokehold this video has on me 🧎🏽‍♀️ HE KNOWS

(video creds to poeskys on twitter)