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My Only Talent Is Consistently Rolling Nat 20’s

@gossip-girl-of-middleearth

I go where my feet take me. They don’t know where we’re going either.
Gossip Girl | 22| She/Her
“Rest In Peace to all the bitches dying to be me.”
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In my Tony Stark eating a donut within a mega donut era

GIF by dadstarkk
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#fuck it we ball#the gods half-assed a hero’s journey for me but left me on the stove too long and now I’m a ‘lil crispy is all#I started so fresh to this adventure thing all wide-eyed and wondrous#now I have the casual flair of a 40-year-old Spider-Man using his powers to grab poptarts from the cupboard whilst sat on the couch#bear with me this hero business is exhausting okay#I’ve got a line of enemies piling up to be my arch nemesis#one is even missing an eye#I have the government and my hometown both after me#potential lovers down on one knee whilst I awkwardly scurry away after pointing at something fake in the distance to distract them#and let’s not forget the episodic events that happen so regularly that I’m convinced I’m in the tv show#oh and can’t forget the horrors#never the horrors#but hey it’s all good#my knees ache these days but the adventure continues#lord of the rings#the hobbit#lotr#the witcher#legolas#jaskier#joey batey#witcher#the amazing devil#marvel#Tony stark
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teamfaggins
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shinraalpha

i love how Gandalf invested in Hobbits in year one and has been pushing them ever since. Thorin, i hear you need help with a breaking and entering. Can I recommend one of these little cunts? Silent as fuck, trust me. Elrond my dude i know you're skeptical but these four chucklefucks just transported a weapon of mass destruction all the way here. Theoden, you've gotta get yourself a hobbit man, I've got a spare one here. Denathor you big prick, take a hobbit - literally this is the bottom of the range but listen to him sing. Beautiful little bastard.

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Where is everyone? 😭 Can all the lovely followers and moots I used to interact with back in the day interact with this post, I need to know if you’re all still alive cause it’s starting to feel like that one Jack Sparrow scene up in here

#WE’VE ALL AGED#LIFE HAS MOVED ON#WHERE ARE YOU ALL#lord of the rings#lotrdaily#lotr movies#the hobbit#elves#the amazing devil#the fellowship of the ring#the Witcher#witcher#Jaskier#gossip girl#xoxo gossip girl#Legolas#legolas x reader#lotr x reader#fellowship x reader#lotr x y/n#lotr x you
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