The Original Sparrabeth Shipper

Also:

This is so hysterical on so many levels, I love it..

This is Scrat the Ice Age squirrel in human form

there is no way to predict how this video will go

I have been reduced to tears

“A Valentine’s cream pie, from 1959”

“Mhmm”

“Now I can't think of anything better for valentine's day than a good old-fashioned cream pie!”

“We're going to want a nine inch. I know I do too.”

“If you've got one, don't just force it in. Be gentle.”

“This finished a bit early. Happens to the best of us.”

“If your hand gets tired, just keep going. I'm single so I'm used to it.”

“Next, a cup of cream, whipped! Some people are into that.”

“Now we get to top, that's always fun!”

“Mm! I like that! I like that, very sweet but I like it!”

Tia Dalma says that Jack Sparrow does not know what he wants but then when everyone was trying to guess what vexes all men he comes right out with it “a woman.”

Because he knows. He know it’s a woman that he wants.

Tiktok has surpassed tumblr LMAO

Baymax in the new Baymax! show buying pads for a girl who got her first period and getting help from people, including a trans man.

Some people are really mad about this, when he is literally a health care robot interested in people's physical and emotional needs.

My very sweet and VERY Catholic coworker: this new abortion law… they’re saying God doesn’t believe in killing the innocent babe to save the wicked mother…. Well I have some news for them about what he did to his own son.

Me: oh my god.

Her: honey. Exactly.

Again

How dare you leave this in the tags

マントリング

Mantling: It is a common position for raptors to put their wings and tail feathers to the ground and hunch their back or “Mantle,” to protect their prey from others.

okay but the fact that geralt (at least non-twn) does a rivian accent apparently fucking KILLS ME because of two possibilities: 

1. theatre nerd jaskier calling him on it fucking IMMEDIATELY bc it’s just. it’s bad. it’s so fucking bad. everyone’s just been too afraid to tell geralt. 

2. the accent is FLAWLESS, and geralt just drops it YEARS into knowing jaskier, who is then just >:O heY GERALT. WHAT IN THE FUCK. SIT DOWN. NO. SIT THE FUCK DOWN. EXPLAIN. EXPLAIN YOURSELF RIGHT FUCKING NOW.

okay but jaskier who wants to help with geralt’s potions finding it fucking INFURIATING to hear instructions, bc after so many years, geralt just knows how much of each thing goes in and no, geralt, “until it’s enough” is NOT a fucking measurement

people who dont live in eastern europe (like rly eastern, im talking east slavic/baltic countries) are really annoying with their posts huh. "im tired of living through historical events" WHAT exactly are you living through, josh, 18, from illinois?? what?

Is everyone ready for 2’s day?!

Reason for living

I can’t wait for 2/22/2222

sorry but this is absolutely sending me

This picture he posted after the video makes it even better