So sorry to do this to you all but. Jackles.

NO ONE knows how to use thou/thee/thy/thine and i need to see that change if ur going to keep making “talking like a medieval peasant” jokes. /lh

They play the same roles as I/me/my/mine. In modern english, we use “you” for both the subject and the direct object/object of preposition/etc, so it’s difficult to compare “thou” to “you”.

So the trick is this: if you are trying to turn something Olde, first turn every “you” into first-person and then replace it like so:

“I” →  “thou”

“Me” →  “thee”

“My” →  “thy”

“Mine” →  “thine”

Let’s suppose we had the sentences “You have a cow. He gave it to you. It is your cow. The cow is yours”.

We could first imagine it in the first person-

“I have a cow. He gave it to me. It is my cow. The cow is mine”.

And then replace it-

“Thou hast a cow. He gave it to thee. It is thy cow. The cow is thine.”

This is perfect and the only thing missing is that when “thy” comes before a vowel it’s replaced by “thine”, i.e. “thy nose” but “thine eyes.” English used to do this with my and mine too (and still does with a and an).

The second person singular verb ending is -(e)st. In the present tense, it works more or less like the third person singular ending, -s: 

The -(e)st ending is only added to one word in a compound verb. This is where a lot of people make mistakes:

NOT

If you’re not sure, try saying it in the third person and replacing the -(e)st with -s:

In general, if there’s one auxiliary, it takes the -(e)st ending) and the main verb does not. If there are multiple auxiliaries, only one of them takes -(e)st:

You can reduce the full -est ending to -st in poetry, if you need to drop a syllable:

In some common words–mostly auxiliary verbs, or what you might have learned as “helping verbs”–the ending is always reduced:

Sometimes this reduction takes the last consonant of the stem with it:

Or reduces the -st down to -t:

However! UNLIKE the third-person singular -s, the second person -(e)st is ALSO added to PAST TENSE words, either to the past stem in strong (irregular) verbs or AFTER THE -ed in weak (regular) verbs: 

This is different from the third person!

It’s not wrong to add -(e)st to a long Latinate verb in the past tense, but it’s unusual; it’s much more common to use a helping verb instead:

And a couple last things:

1.) Third-person -(e)th is mostly equivalent to and interchangeable with third-person -s:

HOWEVER! Third-person -(e)th, unlike -s but like -(e)st, can, sometimes, go on STRONG past-tense verbs:

This never happens with weak verbs:

And even with strong verbs, from Early Modern (e.g., Shakespearean) English onward, it’s quite rare. But you will see it from time to time.

2.) In contemporary Modern English, we invert the order of subjects and auxiliary verbs in questions:

If there’s no auxiliary, we add one–do–and invert that:

In Early Modern English, this process was optional, and mostly used for emphasis; all verbs could be and were moved to the front of the sentence in questions:

Do-support was also optional for negatives:

3.) Imperative verbs never take endings:

4.) Singular ‘you’–that is, calling a singular person by a plural pronoun–arose as a politeness marker; and ‘thou’ fell out of use because it eventually came to be seen as impolite in almost all contexts. In general, once singular ‘you’ comes into use, it is used for addressing

‘Thou’ is used for

It is safer to ‘you’ someone who doesn’t necessarily warrant ‘you’ than to ‘thou’ someone who does.

5.) And finally, that ‘ye’? That’s the nominative form of you–the one that’s equivalent to ‘I’ or ‘we.’ 

Any time you’re using ‘thou’ for the singular, the second person plural– ‘y’all’– declines like this:

I feel like Seattle replaced San Francisco at some point in the last ten years as a metonym for the gayest American city. San Francisco's got too much other shit going on anymore.

NPI licensing outside a downward-entailing environment! Some dialects have this. Is it everywhere or just in the scope of too much?

Hey OP, would you find this sentence grammatical:

"San Francisco's got a lot of other shit going on anymore"?

How about this one:

"San Francisco's got shit going on anymore"?

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue.

I have been waiting for this post all my life.

They are indeed purple, But one thing you’ve missed: The concept of “purple” Didn’t always exist.

Some cultures lack names For a color, you see. Hence good old Homer And his “wine-dark sea.”

A usage so quaint, A phrasing so old, For verses of romance Is sheer fucking gold.

So roses are red. Violets once were called blue. I’m hugely pedantic But what else is new?

My friend you’re not wrong About Homer’s wine-ey sea! Colours are a matter Of cultural contingency;

Words are in flux And meanings they drift But the word purple You’ve given short shrift.

The concept of purple, My friends, is old And refers to a pigment once precious as gold.

By crushing up molluscs From the wine-dark sea You make a dye: Imperial decree

Meant that in Rome, to wear purpura was a privilege reserved

For only the emperor!

The word ‘purple’, for clothes so fancy, Entered English By the ninth century

.

Why then are voilets Not purple in song? The dye from this mollusc, known for so long

Is almost magenta; More red than blue. The concept of purple is old, and yet new.

The dye is red, So this might be true: Roses are purple And violets are blue

.

While this song makes me merry, Tyrian purple dyes many a hue From magenta to berry And a true purple too.

But fun as it is to watch this poetic race The answer is staring you right in the face: Roses are red and violets are blue Because nothing fucking rhymes with purple.

Hirple - To limp or walk awkwardly

Cirple - An old Scots word for the hindquarters of a horse

“Roses are red, violets are purple,

My boner for you has caused me to hirple.”

…

DYING. I AM DYING.

Calling theshitpostcalligrapher! We need @theshitpostcalligrapher

@kiranovember u better buy this as a commission lmao

This post has evolved.

when i was a wee smeet i wrote my mom this poem:

roses are red

violets are violet

if i had a jet plane

i’d let you be the pilot

“Lol” hasn’t meant “laughing out loud” in like 15 years… it’s just a word now and more importantly it’s the perfect way to end a sentence lol

I'm fascinated by how the formatting of different social media sites affect how text is read.

For instance, a line break on Tumblr indicates a new idea.

But a reblog break indicates that time has passed.

You're trying to find a German Audiobook on Spotify?

You've come to the right place, cause I love looking for them!

Start here :

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/40cICWyKwr3dW30hm1urer?si=-rPCxBE2RU2kP6M-CYVMgw

Perhaps continue here :

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3xdgnLwG9NJuNi1Cx1Z9yP?si=DkR6bw68SRCkcYQkUHDysA

It's a list of Chapter 1s of German Audiobooks that are professionally recorded and available on Spotify!

I just found this today and immediately wanted to share. Reblog for other German learners!!!

Bruh, this is a veritable gold mine. Thank you OP! I am sending you the best psychic vibes - this is awesome. 

My pronouns in Latin are ista/istam not illa/illam. Please refer to me with all due scorn as the woman of the greatest shamelessness and audacity that I truly am.

Seems to be most closely related to Luwian, but specialists can't read it yet. It survived because the Hittites wanted to record religious rites in the original language. Thank you, Hittites.

Thank you, Hittites.

As someone who has actually studied the English language there's a common phrase about English that kinda annoys me because while it makes for a funny haha line it's such a gross oversimplification that it actually ceases to be funny. It's the one that goes "The English language is just three languages stacked on top of each other wearing a trenchcoat" or something to that effect.

I'm not going to go into detail as to why that sentence is inaccurate, just take my word for it as a person with a master's in English. I suggest we withdraw this expression from usage and replace it with the much more accurate "The English language is a dirty little slut that loves it when other languages cum big loads in it"

You know what Tumblr, I don't think this one deserves to be found

Alice Te Punga Somerville, Always Italicise: How to Write While Colonised - Kupu rere kē

a shark meets a tuna

the shark says "hi, fish"

the tuna says "what should we do, fish?"

the shark says "it's your choice, fish"

the large pen turns to the small pen and says "crayon"

what do you call a cookie under a tree? a shadowy place

what language do you speak in a sauna? swiss-german

no matter how dense you are, Goethe was a poet

the plural of radish is horseradish

what do you do when you drink coke and beer? you collapse

two magnets meet and one says "I don't know what to wear today"

what do CEOs drink? tapwater

they should have a word called Presterday which means the day before yesterday .

Vorgestern

Anteayer 

завчера

förrgår

Predvčerajšnjem

پرسوں

przedwczoraj

προχθές

మొన్న

předevčírem

aizvakardiena

užvakar

Anteontem

おととい

Позавчера

eergisteren

שלשום

the lesson here is that modern english is a stupid language

прекјуче/prekjuče

முந்தா நேற்று

परह्यः

In linguistics, a filler is a sound or word that is spoken in conversation by one participant to signal to others that he/she has paused to think but is not yet finished speaking.  These are not to be confused with placeholder names, such as thingamajig, which refer to objects or people whose names are temporarily forgotten, irrelevant, or unknown.

Remember that this stuff is really important for fluency of speech. I’ve encountered a bad attitude among language teachers before: “we don’t teach filler words, because that’s not “normative” vocabulary, and it encourages students to sound unsure.”  But that’s so, so wrong.  

All people use filler words in conversation and even in formal settings.  It’s a way to keep the flow of speech when the train of thought pauses; it holds the audience’s attention and actually helps maintain clarity of thought.  What’s more, these words are instrumental for language learners, who need to pause more often in their speech than native speakers.  Allowing them to pause without breaking into their language (saying a filler word in their language) or completely breaking the flow of their speech allows them to gain fluency faster.

My high school Japanese teacher did it right: “etto” and “anou” were in the second lesson.  Teach filler words, people!!  And if you’re studying a language and don’t know them, look at this list!!  It has a lot!