Tall Tales, Hearsay, and Absolute Lies

Ninja Terminator (Godfrey Ho, 1985)

While the Onion buying InfoWars is indeed extremely funny, very few of the posts I've seen commenting on the sale have mentioned that the families of the Sandy Hook victims apparently agreed to voluntarily reduce their lawsuit payout as part of a deal to ensure that the Onion would acquire InfoWars wholesale, rather than having the company broken up and auctioned off piecemeal, as the latter course could potentially have allowed some of those pieces to end up back in the hands of Alex Jones' cronies.

Like, yes, it is in fact very funny that InfoWars is now a wholly owned subsidiary of the Onion, but the real props go out to the Sandy Hook families who saw the opportunity and willingly gave up the additional millions of dollars that could have been realised by stripping InfoWars for parts in order to make that happen.

(EDIT: Fixed a sentence incorrectly suggesting that Clickhole is still affiliated with the Onion – it totally slipped my mind that they'd sold it back in 2020.)

ROBOCOP (1987)

robocop’s famous catchphrase

Girls Night (Mal's 31st birthday, April 17 2078).

Ronnie's been back with the Mox for a bit now so she has enough sway to convince Suze to let them have the whole bar for the birthday party.

Ronnie invited Mal's old mentor from the Afterlife, Rogue. Meanwhile Anna invited Hanako, the Girls' main benefactor and supplier of jobs, via Mal (among other things).

Everything was surprisingly civil and nobody got hurt.

Front (l - r): Anna, Mal, Ronnie Back(l - r): Veil and V

w/ @gibson-girlboss's OCs, Anna and Valerie

If you're having a bad day, just remember that it's going to be winter soon and imagine what will happen to all the Cybertrucks ❤️

Salt-rusted unprotected steel panels... Meltwater getting into poorly constructed and poorly isolated electronics... Stuck in snowdrifts that a real truck would have been able to deal with... Oh, those are indeed happy images. Yes indeed...

It's winter in the US is anything happening to all the cybertrucks

No snow here yet. Lots of Cybertrucks in my area, so I’ll keep an eye out.

Keep us updated I am so curious to see how they handle Normal Weather

There should be Cybertruck Winter, like Fat Bear Week. Where we see which cybertrucks fall first and which ones make it to the end in usable condition.

Dispatch from the far northern hemisphere and have witnessed a Cybertruck in the winter wilds.

We're early enough into the snow season in that the damage isn't obvious. My guess is that exposure to road salts are really going to destroy these ambulatory dumpsters, but we won't start to see that until spring. Road salt is difficult to impossible to get off in a regular car wash, and we know that Cybertruck can't handle even that.

On the one I saw, any metallic shine that the Cybertruck had was completely lost in a combination of cold winter temps, light street grunge, and lower ambient sunlight. It was the same color as my friend's early 2000s silver pickup truck. One of the big draws, imo, is that stainless steel panelling and to see it turn into the same shade of grey as one of the most popular truck colors twenty years ago would be disappointing to me. It's not special anymore.

Local Cybertruck enthusiasts who are salty dogs at winter driving have started vinyl wrapping their automotive basket cases. The trend seems to be to go from the door windows down, which gives them a beach cooler vibe that is similarly underwhelming.

They’re already having issues! The head lights are sunken in for some reason. This means there is a shelf to hold snow in front of the lights and block them.

Now, every car has to have the snow cleared off the headlights before you drive, but this is way worse. That shelf collects snow as you drive. People have to pull over and clear the snow off mid-drive because they lose their headlights.

WHY ARE THEY BUILT THAT WAY

Holy fucking shit of all the possibilities I did not see that one coming.

Hana-Rawhiti Kareariki Maipi-Clarke, the youngest MP in Aotearoa, starts a haka to protest the first vote on a bill reinterpreting the 1840 Treaty of Waitangi

oh to be a polar bear living in abandoned soviet weather station

Some road that goes somewhere, Kimmo Ojaniemi

North American B-25 coming out of final assembly to join others in outdoor assembly

(Alfred Palmer. 1942)

I need an evil wife

I love hotel breakfasts. You have shambling zombies who've managed to scrape together half a braincell, the morning people who've already done their yoga, and the most elegantly put together women you've ever seen, all staring with the same vague confusion at the unholy selection of food on offer.

yes all my favorite characters are desperate to be loved. no i don’t think that says anything about me

If you see this you’re legally obligated to reblog and tag with the book you’re currently reading